The Happiness Tree PDF
Preview The Happiness Tree
THE HAPPINESS TREE by Shane Eric Mathias FORWARD What is Happiness and How Can You Attain It? About Your New Book and it's Author What is the Happiness Tree? How Your Happiness Tree is Organized The 7 Key Roots Like an Ancient Oak Getting Acquainted with the Limbs of Your Happiness Tree LOVE 1. Friendship Trust Empathy Dependability Respect The Canopy of Friendship 2. Family Connection Heritage Acceptance The Family Canopy 3. Relationships Understanding the Dual Nature of Self Self Esteem The Canopy of the Self Intimacy Touch Boundaries Integrity The Question of Marriage When Relationships End The Relationship Canopy HEALTH 1. Mind Management Balance Recovery What is Grief? Is it Grief or Depression? Expansion The Canopy of Expansion Fulfillment The Canopy of Fulfillment 2. Body Food, Water, Digestion / Elimination Shelter, Safety & Security, Sleep, Managing Stress Exercise, Sex The Exercise Canopy The Body Canopy FREEDOM 1. Truth Solitude and Self Awareness Freedom from Deception The Truth Canopy 2. Resource Control and Personal Discipline Building and Maximizing Income What is Resource Control? The Resource and Discipline Canopy 3. Connection to Nature The Essential Source of Everything World of Wisdom, Wonder and Mystery The Nature Canopy (The Importance of Spirituality) PURPOSE 1. Creativity Expression Contribution Achievement and Recognition The Creativity Canopy 2. Generosity Forgiveness Patience Mentorship The Generosity Canopy 3. Self Mastery Learning and Growth Adapting The Self Mastery Canopy Bringing it All Together • How to Live Well and Find Happiness at Any Age Adolescent Adult Senior • Maintaining Health and Happiness in Our Rapidly Evolving Society Copyright Statement The Happiness Tree By Shane Eric Mathias Published by Shane Eric Mathias on Smashwords Copyright 2016, Shane Eric Mathis Smashwords Edition, License Notes This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com or your favorite retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author. THE HAPPINESS TREE FORWARD WHAT IS HAPPINESS AND HOW CAN YOU ATTAIN IT? Well, certainly one flawed concept we have all grown up with is that someday "we will all find happiness". Happiness is not like found money, that just fell out of someone's pocket, nor should it be. Because reaching this all important destination in your personal journey is not something that should be left to chance. It's a nice illusion to think that we can just sit back and one day, the right person, the right job, indeed the perfect life will just fall out of the sky and we'll live happily ever after. But as you will learn, happiness requires action on your part. It is a state of mind that is nurtured and cultivated. The good news is, it's not just a matter of luck: YOU are actually in control. Therefore happiness is well within your grasp, whatever your circumstances or age. Happiness is perhaps most clearly defined by what it is not, rather than what it is. Happiness differs from it's related emotions excitement, elation and bliss, which though potentially more intense, are short-lived emotional states. Also, it's a common mistake to associate one's happiness with certain events, such as becoming wealthy, or taking a cruise. But while these events may "make you happy" initially, they do not necessarily create happiNESS, which is really a cultivated way of life, rather than an emotion. It is a state of mind which ideally, we should expect to return to when the clouds of adversity have begun to clear. Let me say that again: Happiness is a cultivated way of life, rather than an emotion. A state of mind which we should expect to return to when the temporary clouds of adversity have begun to clear. That is a profound statement, because like most of you, for many years, I found my level of happiness ebbing and flowing with the changes in my life, changes over which I seemed to have little control. This sense of one's life being chaotic and out of control creates tremendous insecurity, because from one minute to the next, one may experience joy and then sadness: with emotions shifting like sands in the wind. This lack of emotional continuity can drive us to make poor decisions in an effort to address what we may feel is "missing" in our lives. Chasing short term pleasures may placate our lack of fulfillment in the short term, but usually the payback exceeds whatever may have been gained by the action. And once the initial flush of excitement is over, you're usually right back where you started from. Why is this? Because the fundamental underpinnings of sustainable happiness were not in place. Meaning, if we base our happiness on always being young, gorgeous, successful, wealthy, busy or popular, we will be disappointed most of the time. So, what is the key to living with the reality of our life as it is right now while still experiencing true, sustainable happiness? Follow me as we explore your Happiness Tree in detail and find the definitive answer to that question, together. About Your New Book and it's Author Hello, I'm Shane Mathias. I am just a ordinary guy, who is attempting to live my life in an extraordinary way. I am not a conventional academic, but rather a keen observer of human nature. And what you have before you is the result of my having lived my own life as a sort of ongoing experiment, researching the evolution of my own happiness and then extrapolating that to achieve a greater understanding as to why happiness is at once so essential to the human experience and yet, seemingly elusive The Happiness Tree is a fresh, new look at the "anatomy of happiness". It is not based on any religion, faith, cult, organization or unseen spiritual force. It is a practical, step by step guide that defines happiness and explains how you can create and sustain it. Rather than focusing on what makes people emotionally sick and then trying to figure out how to fix them, it seems to me it's more useful to discover what makes people happy and keeps them that way. Can you imagine what might happen if our nation, indeed our world, suddenly began experiencing an epidemic of happiness? The murder rate would plummet, international conflict would become relegated to the history books, spousal abuse, rape, theft and crime in general would all but disappear. And the resources spent on police forces and military budgets could be redirected to address the many health, wealth and environmental issues that plague us today. What I will never know is how my life might have been different had I acquired this wisdom earlier. But now, at fifty-something, I do believe it takes all of us a while to figure this life thing out. What I don't believe is that everyone must struggle and sacrifice alone in the dark in an effort to earn contentment and serenity, at the risk of possibly living without it. It is possible to quickly shift your perspective on and your relationship to yourself and the world around you and begin experiencing a sustainable happiness today. Yes, I now know that you can grow your own happiness, that you and you alone are the tender of your happiness garden and to a large extent, in control of the bounty it produces. So many of us learn by making mistakes… sometimes repeatedly, but that is a costly game filled with stress, fear, disappointment and wasted time. What if instead of taking a leap of faith, you could proceed with confidence, towards a meaningful life? Becoming a functional, healthy and happy person in weeks, rather than years. Too lofty an aspiration? I say not! What you have before you is a direct result of my having challenged the preconceived notions, fears, biases and flawed approaches that for years led me astray, negatively impacting my health, emotions and relationships. Having reached an extremely low point in my midlife, I knew I would have to throw out all the old patterns and coping strategies to learn once and for all, how to find a deep, sustainable happiness: one that would not depend on any one, or any thing, other than myself. And what I discovered is truly remarkable: a formula for life satisfaction that I believe anyone, man or woman, can follow, to improve any or all areas of their life. And as you will learn, it depends on you tending your "Happiness Tree" on a daily basis. And as you do, your tree will continue to grow deeper roots and more branches, expanding it's canopy throughout your life and beyond. And during that process, you and you alone will be in control, empowered by the new habits and attitudes that you learn and practice. What is the Happiness Tree? The Happiness Tree is a way of visualizing the anatomy of happiness as one would view a family tree, to understand how each component is related to the whole. Just as science has mapped the human genome to understand the very code that supports life itself, it stands to reason that Happiness (a condition so fundamental to the human experience that it is synonymous with "quality of life") can also be broken down into it's elemental parts and then reassembled into a system for understanding and creating a successful life. How Your Happiness Tree is Organized Your Happiness Tree is comprised of the Trunk, Limbs, Branches, Canopy and Roots. The descriptions of each are as follows: The Trunk of your Happiness Tree represents You and Your life. The Limbs, are the major supporting members, of which there are four: Love; Health; Freedom and Purpose. These are the macro areas of your life you must focus on and work to improve, in order to create and sustain happiness. The Major Branches emerge from and yet are supported by the four Limbs. And the healthier each of these branches are, the stronger their related limbs become. Emerging from the Branches are the Subordinate Branches: in this case, Self is shown as a form or experiences of Relationship. As you can see, Subordinate Branches are the ways that one can express or experience the quality of the Parent, or Major Branch. For an example, the Subordinate Branch Self, emerges from the Major Branch, Relationship The Self is an essential type or experience of Relationship. Others would be: Intimacy Touch Boundaries Integrity The Canopy embodies the highest Human aspiration, “Self Integration”. It is from this Self Integration that qualities like Confidence, Skill, Humility, Compassion, Understanding, Wisdom and Integrity will arise. These are not qualities that you are necessarily born with, they must be learned, developed, practiced and eventually expressed through your “Higher Self” to the world around you. Note: Almost all the fine branching systems of your Happiness Tree will terminate in a Canopy. There is a dual goal of this section: A. To review the foregoing information to ensure a complete understanding.
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