The Actor's Way: A Journey of Self-Discovery in Letters

249 Pages·2006·1.89 MB·English

by  Benjamin Lloyd

The
Actor’s
Way
A Journey of Self-Discovery in Letters
BENJAMIN LLOYD
© 2006 Benjamin Lloyd
All rights reserved. Copyright under Berne Copyright Convention, Universal Copyright
Convention, and Pan-American Copyright Convention. No part of this book may be reproduced,
stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form, or by any means, electronic, mechanical,
photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without prior permission of the publisher.
09 08 07 06 05 5 4 3 2 1
Published by Allworth Press
An imprint of Allworth Communications, Inc.
10 East 23rd Street, New York, NY 10010
Cover design by Derek Bacchus
Interior design by Sharp Des!gns, Lansing, MI
Page composition/typography by SR Desktop Services, Ridge, NY
Cover Photo : www.paulgodwin.com
ISBN: 1-58115-447-X
ISBN: 9781581158281
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Lloyd, Benjamin, 1962– The actor’s way:
a journey of self-discovery in letters / Benjamin Lloyd.
p. cm.
Includes bibliographical references and index.
ISBN: 1-58115-447-X
1. Actors–New York (State)–New York–Fiction. 2. Acting teachers–Fiction. 3. Theater–Fiction. 4.
Self-realization–Fiction. 5. New York (N.Y.)– Fiction. I. Title.
PS3612.L554A28 2006
813'. 6–dc22
2006011283
Printed in Canada
TABLE OF CONTENTS
Winter into Spring: Recovery With introduction by Linda Berkowitz
Letter Dec. 26 ‘04: Andy to Alice A cry for help
Letter Jan. 5 ‘05: Alice to Andy On alcoholism, Andy’s history,
narcissism and the wounded actor
Letter Jan. 11: Andy to Alice On his N.y. actor’s life, Winter’s Tale,
Times Square and the insanity of light, the offer to teach
Letter Jan 20: Alice to Andy On Quakerism, memories of her life in
N.y., actors as commodities, teaching, actors and directors, the
“family paradigm”
Postcard Jan. 28: Andy to Alice
Letter Feb. 7: Andy to AUce Memories of Alice teaching, getting fired,
teaching from a book, Keeshan quote, Andy’s history
Letter Feb. 15: Alice to Andy Family paradigm, from pain to creativity,
finding help, on textbooks, questions for the acting teacher, not what
you teach but who you are
Letter Feb. 25: Alice to Andy The Quad described, Alice’s childhood,
Edith introduced
Postcard Mar. 1: Andy to Alice
Postcard Mar. 10: Alice to Andy
Letter Mar. 20: Andy to Alice Actors and directors, judgment, therapy,
meetings, Alice’s teaching questions answered, Stanislavsky, Mamet,
and Bates 38
Letter Apr. 1: Alice to Andy Meetings, Quakerism, vocal ministry, anti-
aesthetic bias in religion and academia, Alice’s family history, spiritual
struggle and sacrifice
E-mail Apr. 3: Maya to Andy
E-mail Apr. 3: Andy to Maya Poem
Letter Apr. 6: Andy to Alice Meetings, knowing your teachers
Letter Apr. 10: Alice to Andy Life at the Quad, how to use
Stanislavsky, his books explained, spirituality and Stanislavsky’s Rays
Postcard Apr. 20: Alice to Andy
Postcard May 10: Alice to Andy
Letter May 15: Andy to Alice Meetings and meetings, questions for
Alice, classroom ritual and Rays, laughter and teaching, exercises
versus scenes, too much talking, commercial audition, Dust, acting
and community, coming to Pennsylvania
Letter May 21: Alice to Andy On writing letters, Andy’s questions
answered, her disease explained, Mamet and Bates
Letter May 23: Andy to Alice His vision in Meeting for Worship
Summer: Study
Workshop Handout: The Four-Fold Way (Arrien)
Workshop Observation: June 8 Student feedback, defining context,
talking too much, exercises versus scenes, touching
Letter June 12: Barbara to Alice Application of The Four-Fold Way,
request for tenure advice
Letter June 14: Andy to Alice On seeing Alice again, on the elderly,
Romeo and Julie
Workshop Observation: June 17 Teacher’s position in the room,
immediacy, length of scenes, on side-coaching, teaching and
performing
Letter June 18: Alice to Barbara Alice’s tenure experience
Rehearsal Notes June 20: Romeo and Juliet, the read-through at the
Quad using Andy’s “age-reversed” concep
Letter June 25: Alice to Andy An apology, on rehearsal room
etiquette, on enforced cheerfulness
Letter June 27: Andy to Alicey An apology, on actors and directors
Postcard July 1: Andy/Maya to Alice
Letter July 3: Andy to Alice Worried about Alice, approach to Romeo
and Julie
Workshop Handout: How to Rehearse a Scene for Class (Fallon)
Letter July 7: Barbara to Alice Response to Alice’s tenure experience,
on isolation in academia, the narcissistic actor, Heavenly Creatures,
Dasha from An Actor Prepares, working on plays not scenes, youth—
narcissism—pop culture
Workshop Handout: Questions and Vocabulary (Lewis)
Workshop Observation: July 10 Response to Barbara’s handout,
simple language, the narcissistic teacher, response to Andy’s handout
Workshop Handout: Alice’s Recipe for an Acting Class (Jones)
Letter July 15: Maya to Alice Request for help, Andy and NYC
Letter July 17: Alice to Andy Observation of Andy coaching, working
with nervous students, working with actors who reach for emotion,
relationship of empathy for character to expression of feeling,
coaching actors through the release of feeling, de-emphasizing the
feelings in feedback, crying and the bag of tricks, feelings as rays,
Romeo Geriatric
Letter July 17: Alice to Barbara Alice’s tenure mistakes, taking leave
of the workshop
Letter July 21: Andy to Alice Crying as badge of honor, relationship of
feelings to being witnessed, Romeo Geriatric, family concerns,
thinking of moving
Letter July 27: Alice to Andy Saturn returns, divine messages, the
Hungry Ghost, on Philadelphia versus New York, queries for Andy
Excerpt: Romeo Geriatric
Review Aug. 4: Romeo Geriatric
Postcard Aug. 15: Andy to Alice
Fall into Winter: Faith
Excerpt: Dust
Letter Sept. 7: Alice to Andy Artists working together over time,
critique of Dust
Letter Sept 12: Andy to Alice Reputations, response to Alice’s critique,
bad rehearsal, doubts about Philadelphia
E-mail Sept. 12: Kamran to Andy
Letter Sept. 14: Alice to Andy On reputations
Letter Sept. 16: David Fallon to Andy Check enclosed
Review Sept. 18: Dust
Note card Sept. 20: Andy to Barbara Haverford Inquiry, Dust invitation
Letter Sept. 22: Alice to Philadelphia Inquirer (unpublished) On
criticism
Letter Sept. 29: Linda Berkowitz to Alice Best wishes
Letter Oct. 6: Alice to Linda Hold me in the Light
E-mail Oct. 12: Andy to David His life in Philadelphia, Philadelphia
versus New York, a new paradigm for the actor—the Citizen Actor, an
invitation
Letter Oct. 12: Barbara to Andy Haverford information, Rilke quote
Note Oct. 15: Andy to Maya On Rilke
Letter Oct. 15: Maya to Alice Bill Irwin and the two George Foxe
E-mail Oct. 22: Andy to Linda Drama Therapy described, Beyond
Therapy, wanting affirmation, the man on the street
Opening Statement, application for Tenure and Promotion to
Associate Professor of Theatre, Haverford College, by Barbara Lewis
On the virtues of the actor and role of creativity in an institution of
higher learning
Letter Nov. 3: Andy to Alice Doubt and worry
Note card Nov. 5: Edith Murphy to Andy Bad news
E-mail Nov. 10: Maya to Marie Pelli Andy’s slip
Letter Nov. 18: Andy to Alice (never sent) A rant with three poems
E-mail Nov. 20: David to Andy Arrival information
Transcript Nov. 25: Alice and Edith in Springfield Hospital On chaos
versus order, faith versus practice, Alice and Sarah, Alice’s mother, on
authenticity, Alice’s prophecy
E-mail Dec. 8: Maya to Marie Cell phone on stage, on family
Transcript Dec. 22: Andy’s ministry at Meeting for Worship in
celebration of Alice Jones
Note card Jan. 5th ‘06: Sarah/Alice to Andy
Afterword by Benjamin Lloyd
Appendix Several exercises described
Bibliography and Works Cited
About the Author
Index
Winter into Spring
RECOVERY
The following are a series of letters between my son Andrew Fallon
and his former teacher, Alice Jones, with other letters and documents
interspersed chronologically. I am grateful to the executor of Alice’s
estate, her sister Sarah Shelly, for permission to publish Alice’s letters
here. My gratitude goes as well to Andy, for being open to this project,
and for all of his assistance in gathering letters and other documents.
One of the aspects of their correspondence that fascinates me is that it
was, at Alice’s insistence, almost entirely handwritten. Without the benefit
(or curse) of the editing properties of computers, Andy’s and Alice’s edits
are visible in the form of crossed out words and phrases. I have left these
intact, sensing that there is something as revealing about what was
almost written as there is in what was finally written. I also include
occasional addenda in the margins of letters. The only editing I have
done is correct some spelling errors. With Andy’s help, I have footnoted
some theatrical phrases or concepts that were clear to him and Alice, but
might not be for a wider audience. I have done the same with some
Quaker ideas, with Sarah Shelly’s assistance. Later, as I include other
authors, I have tried to be true to the difference between handwritten
letters and other types of correspondence, like e-mail. Over the nearly
year-long exchange of their letters and postcards, Alice’s handwriting
went from a graceful, classical script to a nearly illegible shadow of its
former elegance. I occasionally guessed at words I wasn’t able to
decipher. These guesses are in brackets.
The book these letters and documents create is hard to pin down. But
at the center of it is a gesture: the reaching out of a young artist to an
older one, then a grasping of hands, resulting in discoveries about acting,
teaching, and the Life of the Spirit. It was an extraordinary year for all of
us. At the very least, it has brought me closer to my son. I hope you find it
as interesting as I did.

—Linda Emlin Berkowitz
Newton, Massachusetts July, 2006