Sacks- I Have Something To Tell You

2010·11.4 MB·English

by  Joseph Baruch Sacks

“I Have Something to Tell You”: The Importance of Articulation
of Acknowledgment and Admission and the Life Journey
A Meditation and Commentary on Psalm 32
A Professional Project
Presented to the Faculty
Claremont School of Theology
In Partial Fulfillment
Of the Requirements for the Degree of
Doctor of Ministry
By
Joseph Baruch Sacks
May 2010
@2010
Joseph Baruch Sacks
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
This professional project completed by
Joseph Baruch Sacks
has been presented to and accepted by the
faculty of Claremont School of Theology in
partial fulfillment of the requirements of the
Doctor of Ministry
Faculty Committee
Marvin A. Sweeney, Chairperson
Tammi Schneider
Dean of the Faculty
Susan L. Nelson
May 2010
ABSTRACT
“I Have Something to Tell You”: The Importance of Articulation
of Acknowledgment and Admission and the Life Journey
A Meditation and Commentary on Psalm 32
by
Joseph Baruch Sacks
This project finds the growing neglect of Psalms, within the Jewish
community for personal reflection, communal study or personal prayer in favor of
other types of material: contemporary writers of various faiths for personal
reflection and rabbinic literature for communal study chosen usually to begin
discussion of a particular social issue. Psalms used in prayer are either glossed
over or celebrated musically with little or no attention given to the psalm’s
meaning.
This thesis tries to show how Psalms served as the popular mental health
readers of its day through study of one particular psalm, Psalm 32. This psalm
posits that human beings grow and evolve through a three-stage process: one,
awareness that one’s personal anguish is not primarily medically-based
(although one may exhibit physical symptoms) but emotionally- and spiritually-
based; two, that one must undergo serious self-reflection that leads to verbal
sharing with all appropriate others, including G!d (however understood); and
three, that upon doing so, one not only feels an immediate sense of release and
relief but starts to live more joyfully, a path that reaches an apex of sort in one’s
ability to rejoin community and contribute to it by sharing one’s journey and
supporting others in theirs. This process is one that needs renewing throughout
one’s life journey, and the more one lives faithfully in response to this call, the
more one can live with deep satisfaction and gratification for the gift of life.
This thesis serves as a “Meditation and Commentary” by letting the biblical
text itself and the presumed psalmist (distinct from the author) speak of the
psalmist’s life. This meditation and commentary stick close to the text but try to
focus on the spiritual moment and its implications even while remaining in
conversation with biblical scholarship, classical and current.
The thesis will demonstrate the universal applicability of the psalmist’s
journey by making an analogy to two distinct groups of people: those discovering
that they have an addiction and must struggle toward recovery, on the one hand,
and those discovering that their sexual orientation or gender identity do not fit
societal “norms” and struggle to come out to live more fully and joyfully.
Finally this project attempts to show that the process for an individual
within a community may serve as an analogy to the process that communities
within a society may need to undergo.
Acknowledgments
I am deeply grateful to the Claremont School of Theology for affording me
the opportunity to learn within the warm community and open environment where
I could grow personally, intellectually and spiritually.
I particularly wish to acknowledge Marv Sweeney, professor, mentor,
guide and friend who continues to challenge and inspire me as a model not only
of erudition, caring, humility, and humor, but, above all, a model mensh. He
engaged me encouragingly and helpfully throughout my time here, inside and
outside of the classroom and headed my Academic Committee for this project,
particularly with the biblical scholarship that I attempt herein.
Tammi Schneider taught a number of classes that have helped me
tremendously in engaging the biblical text, and she graciously served as a
member of my Academic Committee, offering her genial and genuine support
and her always germane feedback on this project, particularly with my thinking
through the linkages to worship and spirituality.
Kathryn Greider served as a reader, and she particularly challenged me to
reflect more deeply on the psychological aspects of this project and on the
applications I have tried to make. Her attention to detail and to argumentation
were especially helpful for me to bring more of the threads together.
My colleague and friend Eli Shochet of the Academy for the Jewish
Religion, California (AJRCA) also read an early draft of this project. He offered
me cogent feedback regarding the interplay of the personal and the scholarly
within this paper, and he particularly inspired me to locate the relevant voices
among the medieval Jewish philosophical masters.
The registrar, Jennie Allen, went above and beyond in her encouragement
and help in ensuring I complete not only this project but this program. Her grace
and patience are Jobian.
My close friend Fran Lande gave of her indefatigable support and was
always generous with her ears, head and heart to help me think through various
ideas I struggled with on many aspects of this project.
Elaine Walker warmly gave of her time, offering me her considered
feedback on the mechanics of research.
My mother, Rebecca Sacks, has unconditionally offered her love, support
and encouragement in all I do, including all my efforts at CST and, especially,
with this project.
Of course I bear full responsibility for all aspects of this project.
Finally I must acknowledge my life partner, Steven Karash, who, in his
special way, prodded me and encouraged me. He and our son Evan tolerated all
the time I invested in this project, and they celebrate its completion for all the
right and for all the obvious reasons.
Table of Contents
Chapter Page
1. Introduction: The Need for Extended Reflection on Psalm 32..........................1
My Connection to Psalm 32.........................................................................1
This Paper—Why and What........................................................................3
This Paper’s Organization...........................................................................7
A Preliminary Note on Language................................................................8
My Admission Matters—Translation of Psalm 32.....................................13
2. Explaining the Psalm as a Whole: Mechanics Contribute to Meaning............16
Importance of Psalm 32.............................................................................16
Psalm Type................................................................................................17
Structure....................................................................................................20
3. Looking Back on the Journey (Vv. 1-2):
From Awareness to Admission to Forgiveness................................................22
L'David......................................................................................................22
Maskil/A Life Lesson.................................................................................22
Ashrei/Evolving people..............................................................................27
Questions to ponder:.......................................................................36
Ashrei...lo avonJEvolving People...accounts no distortion.......................36
Pesha... Chet.. .A von/Defiance... Off T rack... Distortion............................37
N’sui...k’sui...lo yachshovAtfted...back on track...accounts no................40
Excursus 1: Cain and Our Psalmist..........................................................41
N’sui-pesha, k’sui chata’ah...lo yach-shovlo avonMhose defiance
is lifted, whose life is back on track...accounts no distortion....................46
Excursus 2: Abraham and Our Reputed Psalmist.....................................49
V’ein b’rucho r’miya/iand whose life-spirit contains no deceit....................51
4. The Three Stages of the Psalmist’s Journey (Vv. 3-7)....................................59
Stage 1: Getting to Awareness (Vv. 3-4)...................................................60
Balu atsamay/My bones atrophied........................................................... 68
Hecherash-ti.. .b’sha-agati kol hayomA kept silent...
while I grumbled, constantly.................................................................69
Ki yomam valayla tich-bad alay yadecha/
For day and night Your Hand weighed on me......................................71
Hafach I’shadi/My vitals dried up..............................................................72
B’charvonei kay/fz/feummer’s torridity.......................................................74
Stage 2: Getting to and Offering
Acknowledgment/Admission (V.5).......................................................75
Excursus 3: Adam and Our Psalmist........................................................83
Va-avoni lo chisiti/My distortedness I do not hide.....................................89
AmartiA hereby declare.............................................................................90
Ode aleiA admit..........................................................................................95
P’sha’ayAAy defiances...............................................................................96
Avon chatati/The distortedness of my straying.........................................96
Selah/........................................................................................................98
Excursus 4: The Artistry of Acknowledgment—
Abraham, Our Psalmist and Moses.....................................................98
The importance of verbal articulation: The Work of Milgrom...................101
Verbal Articulation and Jewish Tradition.................................................104
Written Articulation: The Work of Dr. James Pennebaker......................111
Indirect Admission: Verbal or Written......................................................113
How Much Admission Is Appropriate to Make?
Yoma, Ashamnu and Al Chet, and Psalm 19..........................................119
Questions to ponder:.....................................................................131
Stage 3: Sharing the Feeling (Vv. 6-7)....................................................132
A/-zofrTherefore.......................................................................................134
Yit-pallelA.et (the kindness-seeking) examine their lives........................136
Cbas/cMdndness-striving..........................................................................137
L’eit m’tsoAat the moment of discovering.................................................138
Rak/Truly..................................................................................................142
Mayim rab/m/hiighty waters.....................................................................143
Ata seiterli/You are a hiding place for me...............................................146
Mi-tsar tits-reini/From narrow straits You release me..............................147
Excursus 5: The Intertextuality of Psalms 31, 32 and 27.......................150
Ranei falet/euphoric refrains of rescue...................................................154
5. The Call to Community (Vv. 8-11)................................................................156
The Encouragement to Others (Vv. 8-10)...............................................156
Askil-cha v’or-cha.. .i-a-tsa/share, offer, will not close.............................157
DerachAhe path.......................................................................................159
Psalm 32 and Psalm 1.............................................................................160
i-a-tsa alecha einiA will not close an eye to your life...............................164
Al tih’yuA,So) do not be............................................................................169
K’sus k’feredAike a horse or mule............................................................170
Al tih’yu k’sus k’fered...k’mv eilecha/So do not be like a horse or
mule...otherwise, not nearing you......................................................170
bal k’rov eilecha/othemse, not nearing you...........................................171
Rabim mach’ovim la-rasha/
Mighty are the sorrows of the wayward...................................................174
Excursus 6: Waywardness and Society..................................................177
Chesed y’sov’venuAov\ng kindness surrounds them...............................179
Our Psalm and the Thirteen Attributes of G!d.........................................180
Admission, Faith and Trust......................................................................186
Trust and Loving Kindness......................................................................192
Questions to ponder:.....................................................................195
The Closing Call to Rejoice: A Motivational Chant (V.11)........................196
Excursus 7: Psalms 32, 33, 97 and Yom Kippur:
The Exemplary and the Upright.........................................................198
6. The Psalmist’s Journey is Everyone’s Journey: Specific Applications...........206
First Application: The Psalmist and the Addict.......................................208
Second Application: The Psalmist and the Coming Out Process
forGLBT persons................................................................................212
7. The Psalm/ist and Community.......................................................................217
Communal Use of the Psalm...................................................................217
The Psalmist’s program..........................................................................219
Index of Hebrew Biblical Passages....................................................................222
Index of Other Sacred Writings..........................................................................227
Index of Authors................................................................................................. 228
Bibliography.......................................................................................................230