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Practicing Narrative Mediation Loosening the Grip of Confl ict John Winslade Gerald Monk ffffiirrss..iinndddd iiiiii 77//1100//0088 44::2255::3322 PPMM ffffiirrss..iinndddd iiii 77//1100//0088 44::2255::3322 PPMM Practicing Narrative Mediation ffffiirrss..iinndddd ii 77//1100//0088 44::2255::3311 PPMM ffffiirrss..iinndddd iiii 77//1100//0088 44::2255::3322 PPMM Practicing Narrative Mediation Loosening the Grip of Confl ict John Winslade Gerald Monk ffffiirrss..iinndddd iiiiii 77//1100//0088 44::2255::3322 PPMM Copyright © 2008 by John Wiley & Sons, Inc. All rights reserved. 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Jossey-Bass books and products are available through most bookstores. To contact Jossey-Bass directly call our Customer Care Department within the U.S. at 800-956-7739, outside the U.S. at 317-572-3986, or fax 317-572-4002. Jossey-Bass also publishes its books in a variety of electronic formats. Some content that appears in print may not be available in electronic books. Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Winslade, John. Practicing narrative mediation : loosening the grip of confl ict/John Winslade, Gerald Monk. — 1st ed. p. cm. Includes bibliographical references and index. ISBN 978-0-7879-9474 -7 (cloth) 1. Confl ict management. 2. Mediation. 3. Storytelling. 4. Discourse analysis, Narrative. I. Monk, Gerald, date. II. Title. HM1126.W58 2008 303.6'9—dc22 2008018496 Printed in the United States of America first edition HB Printing 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 ffffiirrss..iinndddd iivv 77//1100//0088 44::2255::3322 PPMM Contents Preface vii 1 How to Work with Confl ict Stories: Nine Hallmarks of Narrative Mediation 1 2 Negotiating Discursive Positions 40 3 Tracing Discursive Positioning Through a Conversation 64 4 Working with Cultural Narratives in Mediation 99 5 Divorce Mediation and Collaborative Practice with Chip Rose 129 6 Outsider-Witness Practices in Organizational Disputes with Allan Holmgren 166 7 Employment Mediation with Alison Cotter 185 8 Restorative Conferencing in Schools 215 9 Confl ict Resolution in Health Care 242 Epilogue 283 References 289 About the Authors 299 Index 303 v ffttoocc..iinndddd vv 77//1100//0088 44::2255::4499 PPMM For Michael White (1948–2008) In appreciation for his incalculable contributions to the development of narrative practice ffbbeettww..iinndddd vvii 77//1100//0088 44::2233::4411 PPMM Preface In 2000, we published N arrative Mediation: A New Approach to Confl ict Resolution. This new book began with the idea that we might update that text. However, as we discussed with Jossey- Bass the idea of a second edition containing a number of revisions and also new concepts growing out of our experience over the last seven years, it rapidly became clear that we were talking about more than a few changes and additions. The idea of preparing a completely new text was the logical result. This book is the result of that decision. This book covers new ground in several directions. One direc- tion has led us to examine the development that has been taking place in narrative practice in general in the last ten years. In particular, we have drawn from the wide fi eld of practice of narrative family therapy and community work. In addition, a growing number of practitioners have taken up the practice of narrative mediation, and we have sought to represent that growth through inviting some of these practitioners to participate in writing this book. Finally, we have considered the development that has occurred in our own work through the teaching and practice we have undertaken in the last ten years. When we wrote our 2000 book, we were both living in New Zealand and had been doing mediation primarily in family and organizational contexts. Since 2000, we have both, at different times, relocated to California and widened our familiar domains of practice. Many of the developments recorded here derive from the widening of our contexts of reference for the practices discussed. We have also taught confl ict resolution practice to students in a number of different universities: the University of Waikato in New Zealand; San Diego State University, California State University - San Bernardino, and California State University- Dominguez Hills vii ffpprreeff..iinndddd vviiii 77//1100//0088 44::2266::2288 PPMM viii Preface in the United States; and the Conrad Grebel University College at the University of Waterloo in Canada. In addition to teaching these formal courses, between us we have taught workshops at many sites in many countries: New Zealand, the United States, Australia, Canada, the United Kingdom, the Netherlands, Austria, Denmark, Sweden, Cyprus, Russia, and Israel. The more we teach about narrative mediation, the more we explore the ideas involved and learn from the responses of workshop participants, who ask questions, probe our assumptions, query cultural leanings, get excited about different aspects of this approach, and often apply concepts in different arenas of practice. All this is both grat- ifying and stimulating. It also works on us to develop our own understanding of what narrative mediation is about. In pursuit of constant improvement in the clarity of our teaching, we have designed new teaching tools and exercises, and the practice has changed in our own minds along the way. To us it has seemed to become simpler and clearer, and we hope that is the experience of workshop participants. In the general fi eld of narrative practice, the work of Michael White and David Epston continues to be important, and there are many others who have thrown their lot in with the narrative movement and contributed to what is now a robust and growing literature. In this book Michael White’ s notions of the a bsent but implicit (discussed in Chapter O ne ), d ouble listening (Chapter One ), and o utsider-witness practices (Chapter S ix ) are examples of concepts that we have drawn from new developments in narrative family therapy work. From the work of Bronwyn Davies and Rom Harr é , among others, we have featured the notion of working with discursive positioning, which was mentioned in our 2000 book but not with the same degree of elaboration as here. John’ s own work on a thesis for his PhD degree (completed in 2003) applied the idea of discursive positioning to mediation practice. Some of his thinking has been published in article form and now this book draws more extensively on his work. Our book is also indebted particularly to the collaboration of Wendy Drewery and her inspi- ration and theoretical groundwork. She was also the chief super- visor for John’ s PhD degree study at the University of Waikato. John is also grateful to Terry Locke for his perceptive support and careful attention to John ’s work on the PhD degree project. ffpprreeff..iinndddd vviiiiii 77//1100//0088 44::2266::2288 PPMM