How to Live Well with Chronic Pain and Illness: A Mindful Guide PDF
Preview How to Live Well with Chronic Pain and Illness: A Mindful Guide
How to Live I/Vell with Chronic Pain 42261171a HOW to Live Well wit/9 Chronic Pain and Illness A MINDFUL GUIDE Toni Bernhard Wisdom Publications 199 Elm Street Somerville, MA 02144 USA wisdompubs.org © 2015 Toni Bernhard All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means, elec- tronic or mechanical, including photography, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system or technologies now known or later developed, without permission in writing from the publisher. Library of Congress Cataloging—in-Publication Data Bernhard, Toni. How to live well with chronic pain and illness : a mindful guide / Toni Bern— hard. pages cm ISBN I—6I429—248-5 (pbk. : alk. paper) I. Chronic diseases—Social aspects. 2. Chronic diseases—Psychological aspects. 3. Chronically ill—Care. I. Title. RA644.5.B48 2015 616’.O44—dc23 2015006367 ISBN 978-1-61429-248-7 ebook ISBN 978-1-61429-263-0 1918171615 5 4 3 2 1 Cover design by Phil Pascuzzo. Interior design by GopaSCTedz, Inc. Set in Sabon LT Pro 10.8/ I 6. Wisdom Publications’ books are printed on acid-free paper and meet the guidelines for permanence and durability of the Production Guidelines for Book Longevity of the Council on Library Resources. This book was produced with environmental mindfulness. We have elected to print this title on 30% PCW recycled paper. As a result, we have saved the fol- lowing resources: 33 trees, 2 million BTUs of energy, 2,84 5 lbs. of greenhouse gases, I 5,4 30 gallons of water, and 1,03 3 lbs. of solid waste. For more infor- mation, please visit our website, wisdompubs.org. MIX Printed in the United States of America. Paper from F S C responsible sources Wham FSC° 6011935 Please visit fscus.org. For my children Jamal and Mara... Generous Kind-hearted Honest Dependable. You can count on me. I can count on you. You have made this a good life indeed. ~ e + r e x s s w Table of Contents Introduction: Making Peace with a Life Upside Down I . Skills to Help with Each Day Educating Family and Friends I . about Chronic Pain and Illness P Letting Go: A Not-To-Do List for the Chronically Ill Asking for Help Can Be Your Gift to Others 9-5 Developing the Confidence to Say No 29 When the “Want Monster” Whispers in Your Ear 35 Complaining Is a Recipe for Suffering 39 Dealing with Tough Choice after Tough Choice 45 The Many Benefits of Patience 55 9. Cultivating Kindness 63 II. Mindfulness: Potent Medicine for Easing the Symptoms of Chronic Illness Io. Mindfulness Can Ease Physical Suffering by Easing Mental Suffering 71 xi II. Mindfulness Practices That Address Physical Discomfort 77 Formal Mindfulness Meditation Can Help 12.. Your Mind Help Your Body 87 III. Responding Wisely to Troubling Thoughts and Emotions Breaking Free from Stressful Thinking Patterns 13 95 When the Blues Come Calling 101 I4 Surviving a Bad Mood with Grace 107 15 16 Shedding the Burden of Embarrassment 113 IV. Special Challenges 17. Invisibility: When You Look Fine to Others 121 18. When You and Those You Love Are in Conflict 129 19. The Special Difficulties Faced by Young People Who Are Chronically Ill I39 Maximizing Your Chances of Success at the 2.0. Doctor’s Office 151 Sick Upon Sick: Handling an Acute Illness 2.1. While Chronically Ill 159 22. The Pesky Issue of Sleep I65 23. Longing for That Pre-Illness Life 169 24. The Uncertainty of It All I77 25. Taking Care of the Caregivers 187 V. Isolation and Loneliness 26. Quotations and Reflections on Loneliness I99 27. Healing Loneliness through Mindfulness 205 28. Coping with Isolation During Holidays and Other Gatherings 213 xii How to Live Well with Chronic Pain and Illness VI. Enjoy the Life You Have 29. Beware of “Good Old Days Syndrome” 223 3o. Why Not Me? 227 31. Don’t Let Envy and Resentment Keep You from Enjoying the Life You Have 231 32. Slow Down and Savor Life 241 Appreciating the Wondrousness of the Human Body 33- 7-47 VII. For Family, Friends, Caregivers, and Anyone Concerned about Chronic Illness 34. Setting the Record Straight about Chronic Illness 253 35- What the Chronically Ill Hope Others Will Understand 263 36. “Oh No! ”: What the Chronically Ill Hope Others Won’t Say 271 “Thank You!”: What the Chronically Ill Hope 37- Others Will Say 281 38. What’s in a Name? The Harm Caused by Mislabeling Medical Conditions 287 Letting Go: A Not—To—Do List for Caregivers 39' 2-95 40. Lessons for the Healthy from the Land of the Sick 301 VIII. Last but Not Least 41. True Confessions 315 42. My Heartfelt Wishes for the Chronically Ill '32-5 Afterword 333 Acknowledgments 335 About the Author 337 Table of Contents xiii
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