What to Do Before I Do: The Modern Couple's Guide to Marriage, Money and Prenups

242 Pages·2004·0.77 MB·English

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What to Do Before “I Do” takes the potentially unromantic idea of a
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◆ Can your wife claim your premarital property in a divorce?
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People often enter marriage with only a vague understanding of their
partner’s financial status. Even if you decide against a prenuptial oo
agreement, after reading this book, you will realize how important it
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is to go into a marriage with your eyes wide open. the modern couple’s guide to
marriage, money and prenups
Reference/Weddings $14.95 U.S./$22.95 CAN C
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SPHINX® PUBLISHING d
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ANIMPRINTOFSOURCEBOOKS, INC.® r
NAPERVILLE, ILLINOIS C N i Nihara K. Choudhri
www.SphinxLegal.com UP A
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W hat to D
Before
“I D ”
the modern couple’s guide to
marriage, money and prenups
By Nihara Choudhri
Attorney at Law
S P
PHINX® UBLISHING
ANIMPRINTOFSOURCEBOOKS, INC.®
NAPERVILLE, ILLINOIS
www.SphinxLegal.com
Copyright © 2004 by Nihara K. Choudhri
Cover and internal design © 2004 by Sourcebooks, Inc.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or
mechanical means including information storage and retrieval systems—except in the case of brief
quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews—without permission in writing from its pub-
lisher, Sourcebooks, Inc.®Purchasers of the book are granted a license to use the forms contained
herein for their own personal use. No claim of copyright is made in any government form repro-
duced herein.
First Edition: 2004
Published by: Sphinx®Publishing, An Imprint of Sourcebooks, Inc.®
Naperville Office
P.O. Box 4410
Naperville, Illinois 60567-4410
630-961-3900
Fax: [phone]
www.sourcebooks.com
www.SphinxLegal.com
This publication is designed to provide accurate and authoritative information in regard to the sub-
ject matter covered. It is sold with the understanding that the publisher is not engaged in render-
ing legal, accounting, or other professional service. If legal advice or other expert assistance is
required, the services of a competent professional person should be sought.
From a Declaration of Principles Jointly Adopted by a Committee of the
American Bar Association and a Committee of Publishers and Associations
This product is not a substitute for legal advice.
Disclaimer required by Texas statutes.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Choudhri, Nihara K.
What to do before "I do" : the modern couple's guide to marriage, money,
and prenups / Nihara K. Choudhri.-- 1st ed.
p. cm.
Includes index.
ISBN 1-57248-451-9 (pbk. : alk. paper)
1. Husband and wife--United States--Popular works. 2. Marital
property--United States--Popular works. 3. Antenuptial agreements--United
States--Popular works. I. Title.
KF524.Z9.C47 2004
346.7301'664--dc22
2004020861
Printed and bound in the United States of America.
VP — 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
DEDICATION
To Trin, with love.

Contents
INTRODUCTION . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ix
A QUICK NOTE TO READERS . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . xiii
CHAPTER ONE. FOR RICHER, FOR POORER:
DEBT AND THE MARRIED COUPLE . . . . . . . . 1
The Deal with Debt
Know What You are Getting Into
Joint Debt
Marital Debt
Tax Liability
CHAPTER TWO. FOR BETTER, FOR WORSE:
TILL DIVORCE DO US PART . . . . . . . . . . . 13
The State of Divorce
The Grounds for Divorce
The Basics of Marital Property Division
Understanding Marital Property
Understanding Separate Property
The Division of Marital Property
Special Categories of Marital Property
Spousal Support
CHAPTER THREE. TILL DEATH DO US PART:
PRENUPS AND ESTATE PLANNING . . . . . . 55
An Overview of Estate Law
Dying Without a Will
When Your Spouse Can Rewrite Your Will
Life Insurance
QTIP Trusts
CHAPTER FOUR. WRITING YOUR OWN VOWS:
THE PRENUPTIAL AGREEMENT. . . . . . . . . 69
The Upsides of Prenups
The Downsides of Prenups
When You Should Seriously Consider a Prenup
CHAPTER FIVE. DOING IT RIGHT:
SEVEN RULES FOR A
ROCK-SOLID PRENUP . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 91
Rule #1: Put your prenuptial agreement in writing and make sure
you and your spouse-to-be both sign it
Rule #2: Hire a lawyer to advise you on your prenuptial agreement
and make sure that your spouse-to-be does the same
Rule #3: Provide your spouse-to-be with the complete details of
your personal finances and ask for the same in return
Rule #4: Do not force your spouse-to-be to enter into a prenuptial
agreement
vi what to do before I do
Rule #5: Take care of your prenuptial agreement well in advance of
your wedding
Rule #6: Make sure that your prenuptial agreement is fair to your
spouse-to-be
Rule #7: Update your prenuptial agreement regularly during your
marriage
CHAPTER SIX. ANATOMY OF A PRENUP:
TOPICS TO CONSIDER. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 103
Divorce Provisions
Death Provisions
Money Management Provisions
Insurance Provisions
Lifestyle and Other Miscellaneous Provisions
CHAPTER SEVEN. PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER:
A SAMPLE PRENUPTIAL AGREEMENT. . . . 129
An Introduction to Zack and Skye
Zack and Skye’s Financial Disclosure
The Terms of Zack and Skye’s Prenuptial Agreement
The Final Document: Zack and Skye’s Prenuptial Agreement
CHAPTER EIGHT. AFTER THE HONEYMOON:
A POSTSCRIPT ABOUT POSTNUPS . . . . . . 169
When to Consider a Postnup
GLOSSARY. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 173
APPENDIX A. STATE-BY-STATE SUMMARY
OF PROBATE LAWS. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 187
contents vii
APPENDIX B. STATE-BY-STATE SUMMARY
OF DIVORCE LAWS. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 199
INDEX. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 217
ABOUT THE AUTHOR . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 223
viii what to do before I do
Introduction
When a date has been set and the invitations have been ordered, the
last thing most couples have on their minds is the legal and financial
side of marriage. Who will be responsible for the tax bill? What hap-
pens if one of you dies without a will? How will the house be divided
in the event of a divorce? Almost no one—not even the most hard-
nosed lawyer—enjoys thinking about debt, divorce, and death when
wedding bells are chiming.
Like it or not, however, marriage is as much a legal and financial
relationship as it is a romantic one. Once you walk down that aisle and
exchange your vows, you and your soon-to-be spouse will have a whole
new set of rights and responsibilities with respect to one another that
you did not have before. Most people, however, do not learn about the
legal and economic side-effects of marriage until the unexpected
happens—when it is far too late to protect themselves or the people
they love. Many people would have done things very differently had
they known of the legal and financial consequences of marriage before
tying the knot. Look at some of the following examples.