TillWeHaveFaces:AMythRetoldbyC.S.Lewis(1956) Стр. 1из146 TILL WE HAVE FACES: A MYTH RETOLD by C.S. LEWIS (1956) (version 2.0) Loveistooyoungtoknowwhatconscienceis TOJOYDAVIDMAN PART ONE ONE Iamoldnowandhavenotmuchtofearfromtheangerofgods.Ihavenohusbandnor child,norhardlyafriend,throughwhom theycanhurtme.Mybody,thisleancarrionthat stillhastobewashedandfedandhaveclotheshungaboutitdaily withsomanychanges, theymaykillassoonastheyplease.Thesuccessionisprovidedfor.Mycrownpassestomy nephew. Being,forallthesereasons,freefromfear,Iwillwriteinthisbookwhatnoonewhohas happinesswoulddaretowrite.Iwillaccusethegods,especiallythegodwholivesonthe GreyMountain.That is,Iwilltellallhehasdonetomefromtheverybeginning,asifIwere makingmycomplaintofhimbeforeajudge.Butthereisnojudgebetweengodsandmen, andthegodofthemountainwillnotanswerme.Terrorsandplaguesarenotananswer.I writeinGreekasmyoldmastertaughtittome.Itmaysomedayhappenthatatraveller fromtheGreeklandswillagainlodgeinthispalaceandreadthebook.Thenhewilltalkofit amongtheGreeks,wherethereisgreatfreedomofspeechevenaboutthegodsthemselves. Perhapstheirwisemenwillknowwhethermycomplaintisrightorwhetherthegodcould havedefendedhimselfifhehadmadeananswer. IwasOrualtheeldestdaughterofTrom,KingofGlome.ThecityofGlomestandsontheleft handoftheriverShennittoatravellerwhoiscomingupfromthesouth-east,notmorethan aday'sjourneyaboveRingal,whichisthelasttownsouthwardthatbelongstothelandof Glome.Thecityisbuiltaboutasfarbackfromtheriverasawomancanwalkinthethirdof anhour,fortheShennitoverflowsherbanksinthespring.Insummertherewasthendry mudoneachsideofit,andreeds,andplentyofwaterfowl.Aboutasfarbeyondthefordof theShennitasourcityisonthissideofityoucometotheholyhouseofUngit.Andbeyond thehouseofUngit(goingallthetimeeastandnorth)youcomequicklytothefoothillsof theGreyMountain.ThegodoftheGreyMountain,whohatesme,isthesonofUngit.He doesnot,however,liveinthehouseofUngit,butUngitsitstherealone.Inthefurthest recessofherhousewhereshesitsitissodarkthatyoucannotseeherwell,butinsummer enoughlightmaycomedownfromthesmoke-holesintherooftoshowheralittle.Sheisa blackstonewithoutheadorhandsorface,andaverystronggoddess.Myoldmaster,whom wecalledtheFox,saidshewasthesamewhomtheGreekscallAphrodite;butIwriteallthe namesofpeopleandplacesinourownlanguage. 16-May-06 TillWeHaveFaces:AMythRetoldbyC.S.Lewis(1956) Стр.2 из146 Iwillbeginmywritingwiththedaymymotherdiedandtheycutoffmyhair,asthecustom is.TheFox—buthewasnotwithusthen —saiditisacustomwelearnedfromtheGreeks. Batta,thenurse,shoremeandandmysisterRedivaloutsidethepalaceatthefootofthe gardenwhichrunssteeplyupthehillbehind.Redivalwasmysister,threeyearsyounger thanI,andwetwowerestilltheonlychildren.WhileBattawasusingtheshearsmanyother oftheslavewomenwerestandinground,fromtimetotimewailingfortheQueen'sdeath andbeatingtheirbreasts;butinbetweentheywereeatingnutsandjoking.Astheshears snippedandRedival'scurlsfelloff,theslavessaid,"Oh,whatapity!Allthegoldgone!" TheyhadnotsaidanythinglikethatwhileIwasbeingshorn.ButwhatIrememberbestis thecoolnessofmyheadandthehotsunonthe backofmyneckwhenwewerebuilding mudhouses,RedivalandI,allthatsummerafternoon. OurnurseBattawasabig-boned,fair-haired,hard-handedwomanwhommyfatherhad boughtfromtraderswhogotherfurthernorth.Whenweplaguedhershewouldsay,"Only waittillyourfatherbringshomeanewqueentobeyourstepmother.It'llbechangedtimes foryouthen.You'llhavehardcheeseinsteadofhoney-cakesthenandskimmilkinsteadof redwine.Waitandsee." Asthingsfellout,wegotsomethingelsebeforewegotastepmother.Therewasabitterfrost thatday.RedivalandIwerebooted(wemostlywentbarefootorsandalled) andtryingto slideintheyardwhichisatthebackoftheoldestpartofthepalace,wherethewallsare wooden.Therewasiceenoughallthewayfromthebyre-doortothebigdunghill,whatwith frozenspillsofmilkandpuddlesandthestaleofthebeasts,buttooroughforsliding.And outcomesBatta,withthecoldreddeninghernose,callingout,"Quick,quick!Ah,you filthies!Comeand becleanedandthentotheKing.You'llseewho'swaitingforyouthere. Myword!This'llbeachangeforyou." "IsittheStepmother?"saidRedival. "Oh,worsethanthat,worsethanthat;you'llsee,"saidBatta,polishingRedival'sfacewith theendofherapron."Lotsofwhippings forthepairofyou,lotsofear-pullings,lotsofhard work."Thenwewereledoffandovertothenewpartsofthepalace,whereitisbuiltof paintedbrick,andtherewereguardsintheirarmour,andskinsandheadsofanimalshung uponthe walls.InthePillarRoomourfatherwasstandingbythehearth,andoppositehim therewerethreemenintravellingdresswhomweknewwellenough—traderswho cameto Glomethreetimesayear.Theywerejustpackinguptheirscales,soweknewtheyhadbeen paidforsomething,andonewasputtingupafetter,soweknewtheymusthavesoldour fatheraslave.Therewasashort,thick-setmanstanding beforethem,andweknewthis mustbethemantheyhadsold,foryoucouldstillseethesoreplacesonhislegswherethe ironshadbeen.Buthedidnotlooklikeanyother slavewehadeverknown.Hewasvery bright-eyed,andwhateverofhishairandbeardwasnotgreywasreddish. "Now,Greekling,"saidmyfathertothisman,"Itrusttobegetaprinceoneofthesedays andIhaveamindtoseehimbroughtupinallthewisdomofyourpeople.Meanwhile practiceonthem."(Hepointedatuschildren.)"Ifamancanteachagirl,hecanteach anything."Then,justbeforehesentusaway,hesaid,"Especiallytheelder.Seeifyoucan makeherwise;it'saboutallshe'lleverbegoodfor."Ididn'tunderstandthat,butIknewit waslikethingsIhad heardpeoplesayofmeeversinceIcouldremember. IlovedtheFox,asmyfather calledhim,betterthananyoneIhadyetknown.Youwould havethoughtthatamanwhohadbeenfreeintheGreeklands,andthenbeentakeninwar andsoldfarawayamongthebarbarians,wouldbedowncast.Andsohewassometimes, possiblymoreoftenthanI,inmychildishness,guessed.ButIneverheardhimcomplain; 16-May-06 TillWeHaveFaces:AMythRetoldbyC.S.Lewis(1956) Стр.3 из146 andIneverheardhimboast(asalltheotherforeignslavesdid)aboutthegreatmanhehad beeninhisowncountry.Hehadallsortsofsayingstocheerhimselfupwith:"Nomancan beanexileifheremembersthatalltheworldisonecity,"and,"Everythingisasgoodorbad asouropinionmakesit."ButIthinkwhatreallykepthimcheerfulwashisinquisitiveness.I neverknewsuchamanforquestions.Hewantedtoknoweverythingaboutourcountryand languageandancestorsandgods,andevenourplantsandflowers. ThatwashowIcametotellhimallaboutUngit,aboutthegirlswhoarekeptinherhouse, andthepresentsthatbrideshavetomaketoher,andhowwesometimes, inabadyear, havetocutsomeone'sthroatandpourthebloodoverher.HeshudderedwhenIsaidthat andmutteredsomethingunderhisbreath;butamomentlaterhesaid,"Yes,sheis undoubtedlyAphrodite,thoughmoreliketheBabylonianthantheGreek.Butcome,I'lltell youataleofourAphrodite." Thenhedeepenedand liltedhisvoiceandtoldhowtheirAphroditeoncefellinlovewiththe princeAnchiseswhilehekepthisfather'ssheepontheslopesofamountaincalledIda.And asshecamedownthegrassyslopestowardshisshepherd'shut,lionsandlynxesand bears andallsortsofbeastscameaboutherfawninglikedogs,andallwentfromheragainin pairstothedelightsoflove.Butshedimmedhergloryandmadeherselflikeamortal womanandcametoAnchisesandbeguiledhimandtheywentuptogetherintohisbed.I thinktheFoxhadmeanttoendhere,butthesongnowhadhiminitsgrip,andhewenton totellwhatfollowed;howAnchiseswokefromsleepandsawAphrodite standinginthe doorofthehut,notnowlikeamortalbutwiththeglory.Soheknewhehadlainwitha goddess,andhecoveredhiseyesandshrieked,"Killmeat once." "Notthatthiseverreallyhappened,"theFoxsaidinhaste."It'sonlyliesofpoets,liesof poets,child.Notinaccordancewithnature."Buthehadsaidenough toletmeseethatifthe goddesswasmorebeautifulinGreece thaninGlomeshewasequallyterribleineach. ItwasalwayslikethatwiththeFox;hewasashamedoflovingpoetry("Allfolly,child")and Ihadtoworkmuchatmyreadingandwritingandwhathecalledphilosophyinordertoget apoemoutofhim.Butthus,littlebylittle,hetaughtmemany.Virtue,soughtbymanwith travailandtoilwastheonehepraisedmost,butIwasneverdeceivedbythat.Thereallilt cameintohisvoiceand therealbrightnessintohiseyeswhenwewereoffintoTakemeto theapple-ladenlandor TheMoon'sgonedown,but AloneIlie. Healwayssangthatoneverytenderlyandasifhepitiedmeforsomething.Helikedme betterthanRedival,whohatedstudyandmockedandplaguedhimandsettheotherslaves ontoplaytricksonhim. Weworkedmostoften(insummer)onthelittlegrassplotbehindthepeartrees,anditwas thereonedaythattheKingfoundus.Weallstoodup,ofcourse,twochildrenandaslave withoureyesonthegroundandourhandscrossedonourbreasts.TheKingsmackedthe Foxheartilyonthebackandsaid,"Courage,Fox.There'llbeaprinceforyoutoworkonyet, pleasethegods.Andthankthemtoo,Fox,foritcan'toftenhavefallentothelotofamere Greeklingtorulethegrandsonofsogreatakingasmyfather-in-lawthatistobe.Notthat you'llknoworcaremoreaboutitthananass.You'reallpedlarsandhuckstersdowninthe Greeklands,eh?" 16-May-06 TillWeHaveFaces:AMythRetoldbyC.S.Lewis(1956) Стр.4 из146 "Arenotallmenofoneblood,Master?"saidtheFox. "Ofoneblood?"saidtheKingwithastareandagreatbull-laugh."I'dbesorrytothinkso." ThusintheenditwastheKinghimselfandnotBattawhofirsttoldusthattheStepmother wasreallyathand.Myfatherhadmadeagreatmatch.Hewastohavethethirddaughterof theKingofCaphad,whoisthebiggestkinginallourpartoftheworld.(Iknownowwhy Caphadwantedanalliancewithsopoorakingdomasweare,andIhavewonderedhowmy fatherdidnotseethathisfather-in-lawmustalreadybeasinkingman.Themarriageitself wasaproofofit.) Itcannothavebeenmanyweeksbeforethemarriagetookplace,butinmymemorythe preparationsseemtohavelastedforalmostayear.Allthebrickworkroundthegreatgate waspaintedscarlet,andtherewerenewhangingsforthePillarRoom,andagreatnewroyal bedwhichcosttheKingfarmorethanhewaswisetogive.Itwasmadeofaneasternwood whichwassaidtohavesuchvirtuethatfourofeveryfivechildrenbegotteninsuchabed wouldbemale.("Allfolly,child,"saidtheFox,"thesethingscomeaboutbynatural causes.")Andasthedaydrewnearertherewasnothingbutdrivinginofbeastsand slaughteringofbeasts—thewholecourtyardreekedwiththeskinsofthem —andbaking andbrewing.Butwechildrenhadnotmuchtimetowanderfromroomtoroomandstare andhinder,fortheKingsuddenlytookitintohisheadthatRedivalandIandtwelveother girls,daughtersofnobles,weretosingthebridalhymn.Andnothingwoulddohimbuta Greekhymn,whichwasathingnootherneighbouringkingcouldhaveprovided."But, Master—" saidtheFox,almostwithtearsinhiseyes."Teach'em,Fox,teach'em,"roared myfather."What'stheuseofmyspendinggoodfoodanddrinkonyourGreekbellyifI'm nottogetaGreeksongout ofyouonmyweddingnight?What'sthat?Noone'saskingyou toteachthemGreek.Ofcoursetheywon'tunderstandwhat they'resinging,buttheycan makethenoises.Seetoit,oryourback'llberedderthaneveryourbeardwas." Itwasacrazyscheme,andtheFoxsaidafterwardsthattheteachingofthathymntous barbarianswaswhatgreyedthelastredhair."Iwasafox,"hesaid,"nowIamabadger." WhenwehadmadesomeprogressinourtasktheKingbroughtthePriestofUngitinto hearus.IhadafearofthatPriestwhichwasquitedifferentfrommyfearofmyfather. I thinkthatwhatfrightenedme(inthoseearlydays)wastheholinessofthesmellthathung abouthim—atemple-smellofblood(mostlypigeons'blood,buthehadsacrificedmen, too)and burntfatandsingedhairandwineandstaleincense.ItistheUngitsmell.Perhaps Iwasafraidofhisclothestoo;alltheskinstheyweremadeof,andthedriedbladders,and thegreatmaskshapedlikeabird'sheadwhichhungonhischest.Itlookedasiftherewerea birdgrowingout ofhisbody. Hedidnotunderstand awordofthehymn,northemusiceither,butheasked,"Arethe youngwomentobeveiledorunveiled?" "Needyouask?"saidtheKingwithoneofhisgreatlaughs,jerkinghisthumbinmy direction."DoyouthinkIwantmyqueenfrightenedout ofhersenses?Veilsofcourse.And goodthickveilstoo."Oneoftheothergirlstittered,andIthinkthatwasthefirsttimeI clearlyunderstoodthatIamugly. ThismadememoreafraidoftheStepmotherthanever.Ithoughtshewouldbecruellerto methantoRedivalbecauseofmyugliness.Itwasn'tonlywhatBattahadsaidthat frightenedme;Ihadheardofstepmothersinplentyofstories.Andwhenthenightcame andwewereallinthepillaredporch,nearlydazzledwiththetorchesandtryinghardtosing 16-May-06 TillWeHaveFaces:AMythRetoldbyC.S.Lewis(1956) Стр.5 из146 ourhymnastheFoxhadtaughtusto— andhekeptonfrowningandsmilingandnodding atuswhilewesang,andoncehehelduphishandsinhorror—picturesofthingsthathad beendonetogirlsinthestoriesweredancinginmymind.Thencametheshoutsfrom outside,andmoretorches,andnextmomenttheywereliftingthebrideoutofthechariot. Shewasasthicklyveiledaswe,andallIcouldseewasthatshewasverysmall;itwasasif theywereliftingachild.Thatdidn'teasemyfears;"thelittlearethespiteful,"ourproverb says.Then(stillsinging)wegotherintothebridalchamberandtookoffherveil. IknownowthatthefaceIsawwasbeautiful,butIdidnotthinkofthatthen.AllIsawwas thatshewasfrightened,morefrightenedthanI— indeedterrified.Itmademeseemy fatherashemusthavelookedtoher,amomentsince,whenshehadherfirstsightofhim standingtogreetherintheporch.Hiswasnotabrow,amouth,agirth,astance,oravoice toquietagirl'sfear. Wetookofflayerafterlayerofherfinery,makingheryetsmaller,and lefttheshivering, whitebodywithitsstaringeyesintheKing'sbed,andfiledout.Wehadsungverybadly. 16-May-06 TillWeHaveFaces:AMythRetoldbyC.S.Lewis(1956) Стр.6 из146 TWO Icansayverylittleaboutmyfather'ssecondwife,forshedidnotlivetilltheendofherfirst yearinGlome.Shewaswithchildassoonasanyonecouldreasonablylookforit,andthe KingwasinhighspiritsandhardlyeverranacrosstheFoxwithoutsayingsomethingabout theprincewhowastobeborn.HemadegreatsacrificestoUngiteverymonthafterthat. HowitwasbetweenhimandtheQueenIdonotknow;exceptthatonce,aftermessengers hadcomefromCaphad,IheardtheKingsaytoher,"Itbeginstolook,girl,asifIhaddriven mysheeptoabadmarket.Ilearnnowthatyourfatherhaslosttwotowns—no,three, thoughhetriestomincethematter.Iwouldthankhimtohavetoldmehewassinking beforehepersuadedmetoembarkinthesamebottom."(Iwasleaningmyheadonmy window-silltodrymyhairafterthebath,andtheywerewalkinginthegarden.)However thatmightbe,itiscertainthatshewasveryhomesick,andIthinkourwinterwastoohard forhersouthernbody.Shewassoonpaleandthin.IlearnedthatIhadnothingtofearfrom her.Shewasatfirstmoreafraidofme;afterthat,verylovinginhertimidway,andmore likeasisterthanastepmother. Ofcoursenooneinthehousewenttobedonthe nightofthebirth,forthat,theysay,will makethechildrefusetowakeintotheworld.WeallsatinthegreathallbetweenthePillar RoomandtheBedchamber,inaredglareofbirth-torches.Theflamesswayedandguttered terribly,foralldoorsmustbeopen;theshuttingofadoormightshutupthemother's womb.Inthemiddleofthehallburnedagreatfire.EveryhourthePriestofUngitwalked rounditninetimesandthrewintheproperthings.TheKingsatinhischairandnever movedallnight,notevenhishead.IwassittingnexttotheFox. "Grandfather,"Iwhisperedtohim,"Iamterribly afraid." "Wemustlearn,child,nottofearanythingthatnaturebrings,"hewhisperedback. Imusthavesleptafterthat,forthenextthingIknewwasthesoundofwomenwailingand beatingthebreastasIhadheardthemdoitthe daymymotherdied.Everythinghad changedwhileIslept.Iwasshiveringwithcold.Thefirehadsunklow,theKing'schairwas empty,thedooroftheBedchamberwasatlastshut,andtheterriblesoundsfromwithinit hadstopped.Theremusthavebeensomesacrificetoo,fortherewasasmellofslaughtering, andbloodonthefloor,andthePriestwascleaninghisholyknife.Iwasallinadazefrom mysleep,forIstartedupwiththewildestidea;IwouldgoandseetheQueen.TheFoxwas aftermelongbeforeIreachedthedooroftheBedchamber."Daughter,daughter,"hewas saying."Notnow.Areyoumad?TheKing—" Atthatmomentthedoorwasflungopenandoutcamemyfather.Hisfaceshockedmefull awake,forhewasinhispalerage.Iknewthatinhisredragehewouldstormandthreaten, andlittlemightcomeofit,butwhenhewaspalehewasdeadly."Wine,"hesaid,notvery loud;andthattoowasabadsign.Theotherslavespushedforwardaboywhowasrathera favourite,asslavesdowhentheyareafraid.Thechild,whiteashismasterandinallhis finery(myfatherdressedtheyounger slavesveryfine)camerunningwiththeflagonand theroyalcup,slippedintheblood,reeled,anddroppedboth.Quickasthought,myfather whippedouthisdaggerandstabbedhimintheside.Theboydroppeddeadinthebloodand wine,andthefallofhisbodysenttheflagonrollingoverand over.Itmadeagreatnoisein thatsilence;Ihadn'tthoughttillthenthatthefloorofthehallwassouneven.(Ihavere- paveditsince.) Myfatherstaredforamomentathisowndagger;stupidly,itseemed.Thenhewentvery gentlyuptothePriest. 16-May-06 TillWeHaveFaces:AMythRetoldbyC.S.Lewis(1956) Стр.7из146 "WhathaveyoutosayforUngitnow?"heasked,stillinthatlowvoice."Youhadbetter recoverwhatsheowesme.Whenareyougoingtopaymeformygoodcattle?"Then,aftera pause,"Tellme,prophet,whatwouldhappenifIhammeredUngitintopowderandtiedyou betweenthehammersandthestone?" ButthePriestwasnotintheleastafraidoftheKing. "Ungithears,King,evenatthismoment,"hesaid. "AndUngitwillremember.Youhavealreadysaidenoughtocalldowndoomuponallyour descendants." "Descendants,"saystheKing."Youtalkofdescendants,"stillveryquiet,butnowhewas shaking.Theiceofhisragewouldbreakanymoment.Thebodyofthedeadboycaughthis eye."Whodidthat?"heasked.ThenhesawtheFoxandme.Allthebloodrushedintohis face,andnowatlastthevoicecameroaringoutofhischestloudenoughtolifttheroof. "Girls,girls,girls!"hebellowed."Andnowonegirlmore.Istherenoendtoit?Istherea plagueofgirlsinheaventhatthegodssendmethisfloodofthem?You—you—" Hecaught mebythehair,shookmetoandfro,andflungmefromhimsothatIfellinaheap.There aretimeswhenevenachildknowsbetterthantocry.WhentheblacknesspassedandI couldseeagain,hewasshakingtheFoxbyhisthroat. "Here'sanoldbabblerwhohaseatenmybreadlongenough,"hesaid."Itwouldhavepaid mebettertobuyadogasthingsturnout.ButI'llfeedyouinidlenessnolonger.Someof youtakehimtotheminestomorrow.Theremightbeaweek'sworkinhisoldboneseven now." Againtherewasdeadsilenceinthehall.SuddenlytheKingflunguphishands,stamped, andcried,"Faces,faces,faces!Whatareyouallgapingat?It'dmakeamanmad.Beoff! Away!Outofmysight,thewholepackofyou!" Wewereoutofthehallasquickasthedoorwayswouldletus. TheFoxandIwentoutofthelittledoorbytheherb-gardenontheeast.Itwasnearly daylightnowandtherewasasmallrainbeginning. "Grandfather,"saidI,sobbing,"youmustflyatonce.Thismoment,beforetheycometo takeyoutothemines." Heshookhishead."I'mtoooldtorunfar,"hesaid."AndyouknowwhattheKingdoesto runawayslaves." "Butthemines,themines!Look,I'llcomewithyou.Ifwe'recaughtI'llsayImadeyou come.Weshall bealmostoutofGlomeoncewe'reoverthat."Ipointedtotheridgeofthe GreyMountain,nowdarkwithawhitedaybreakbehindit,seen throughtheslantingrain. "Thatisfoolishness,daughter,"saidhe,pettingmelikeasmallchild."TheywouldthinkI wasstealingyoutosell.No;Imustflyfurther.Andhelpmeyoushall.Downbytheriver; youknowthelittleplantwiththepurplespotsonitsstalk.It'stherootsofitIneed." "Thepoison?" 16-May-06 TillWeHaveFaces:AMythRetoldbyC.S.Lewis(1956) Стр. 8из146 "Why,yes.(Child,child,don'tcryso.)HaveInottoldyouoftenthattodepartfromlifeofa man'sownwillwhenthere'sgoodreason isoneofthethingsthatareaccordingtonature? Wearetolookonlifeas—" "Theysaythatthosewhogothatwayliewallowinginfilth —downthereinthelandofthe dead." "Hush,hush.Areyoualsostillabarbarian?Atdeathweareresolvedintoourelements. ShallIacceptbirthandcavilat—" "Oh,Iknow,Iknow.But,Grandfather,doyoureallyinyourheartbelievenothingofwhatis saidaboutthegodsandThoseBelow?Butyoudo,youdo.Youaretrembling." "That'smydisgrace.Thebodyisshaking.Ineedn'tletitshakethegodwithinme.Have I notalreadycarriedthisbodytoolongifitmakessuchafoolofmeattheend?Butweare wastingtime." "Listen!"saidI."What'sthat?"ForIwasinastatetobescaredbyeverysound. "Horses,"saidtheFox,peeringthroughthequick-hedgewithhiseyesscreweduptosee againsttherain."Theyarecomingtothegreatdoor.MessengersfromPhars,bythelookof them.AndthatwillnotsweetentheKing'smoodeither.Willyou—ah,Zeus,itisalready toolate."Fortherewasacallfromwithin-doors,"TheFox,theFox,theFoxtotheKing." "Aswellgoasbedragged,"saidtheFox."Farewell,daughter,"andhekissedme,Greek fashion,ontheeyesandthehead.ButIwentinwithhim.IhadanideaIwouldfacethe King;thoughwhetherImeanttobeseechhimorcursehimorkillhimIhardlyknew.Butas wecametothePillarRoomwesawmanystrangerswithin,andtheKingshoutedthrough theopendoor,"Here,Fox,I'veworkforyou."Thenhesawmeandsaid,"Andyou,curd- face,beofftothewomen'squartersanddon'tcomeheretosourthemorningdrinkforthe men." IdonotknowthatIhaveever(tospeakofthingsmerelymortal)beeninsuchdreadasI wasfortherestofthatday—dreadthatfeelsasiftherewereanemptyplacebetweenyour bellyandyourchest.Ididn'tknowwhetherIdaredbecomfortedbytheKing'slastwordsor not,fortheysoundedasifhisangerhadpassed,butitmightblazeoutagain.Moreover,I hadknownhimdoacruelthingnotinangerbutinakindofmurderousjoke,orbecausehe rememberedhehadsworn todoitwhenhewasangry.Hehadsentoldhouse-slavestothe minesbefore.AndIcouldnotbealonewithmyterror,fornowcomesBattatoshearmy headandRedival'sagainastheyhadbeenshornwhenmymotherdied,andtomakeagreat tale(clickinghertongue)ofhowtheQueenwasdeadinchildbed,whichIhadknownever sinceIheardthemourning,andhowshehadborneadaughteralive.Isatfortheshearing andthoughtthat,iftheFoxmustdieinthemines,itwasveryfitIshouldoffermyhair. LankanddullandlittleitlayonthefloorbesideRedival'sringsofgold. IntheeveningtheFoxcameandtoldmethattherewasnomoretalkofthemines— forthe present.Athingthathadoftenirkedmehadnowbeenoursalvation.Moreandmore,of late,the KinghadtakentheFoxawayfromusgirlstoworkforhiminthePillarRoom;he hadbeguntofindthattheFoxcouldcalculateandreadandwriteletters(atfirstonlyin Greekbutnowinthespeechofourpartstoo)andgiveadvicebetterthananymanin Glome.Thisverydaythe FoxhadtaughthimtodriveabetterbargainwiththeKingof Pharsthanhewouldeverhavethoughtofforhimself.TheFoxwasatrueGreek;wheremy fathercouldgiveonlyaYesoraNotosomeneighbouringkingordangerousnoble,hecould 16-May-06 TillWeHaveFaces:AMythRetoldbyC.S.Lewis(1956) Стр.9 из146 paretheYestotheveryquickandsweetentheNotillitwentdownlikewine.Hecould makeyourweakenemybelievethatyouwerehisbestfriendandmakeyourstrongenemy believeyouweretwiceasstrongasyoureallywere.Hewasfartoousefultobesenttothe mines. TheyburntthedeadQueenonthethirdday,andmyfathernamedthechildIstra."Itisa goodname,"saidtheFox,"averygoodname.Andyouknowenough nowtotellmewhatit wouldbeinGreek." "ItwouldbePsyche,Grandfather,"saidI. New-bornchildrenwerenorarityinthepalace;theplacesprawledwiththeslaves'babies andmyfather'sbastards.Sometimesmyfatherwouldsay,"Lecherousrascals!Anyone'd thinkthiswasUngit'shouse,notmine,"andthreatentodrownadozenofthemlikeblind puppies.Butinhishearthethoughtthebetterofaman-slaveifhecouldgethalfthemaids intheplacewithchild,especiallyiftheyboreboys.(Thegirls,unless theytookhisown fancy,weremostlysoldwhentheywereripe;someweregiventothehouseofUngit.) Nevertheless,becauseIhad(alittle)lovedtheQueen,IwenttoseePsychethatvery eveningassoonastheFoxhadsetmymindatrest.Andso,inonehour,Ipassedoutofthe worstanguishIhadyetsufferedintothe beginningofallmyjoys. Thechildwasverybig,notawearishlittlethingasyoumighthaveexpectedfromher mother'sstature,andveryfairofskin.Youwouldhavethoughtshemadebrightallthe corneroftheroominwhichshelay.Sheslept(tinywasthesoundofherbreathing).But thereneverwasachildlikePsycheforquietnessinhercradledays.AsIgazedatherthe Foxcameinontiptoesandlookedovermyshoulder."Nowbyallthegods,"hewhispered, "oldfoolthatIam,Icouldalmostbelievethattherereallyisdivinebloodinyourfamily. Helenherself,new-hatched,musthavelookedso." Battahadputhertonursewithared-hairedwomanwhowassullenand(likeBattaherself) toofondofthewine-jar.Isoonhadthechildoutoftheirhands.Igotforhernurseafree woman,apeasant'swife,ashonestandwholesomeasIcouldfind,andafterthatbothwere inmyownchamberdayandnight.Battawasonlytoopleasedtohaveherworkdonefor her,andtheKingknewandcarednothingaboutit.TheFoxsaidtome,"Don'twearyourself out,daughter,withtoomuchtoil,evenifthechildisasbeautifulasagoddess."ButI laughedinhisface.IthinkIlaughedmoreinthosedaysthaninallmylifebefore.Toil?I lostmoresleeplookingonPsycheforthejoyofitthaninanyotherway.AndIlaughed becauseshewasalwayslaughing.Shelaughedbeforethethirdmonth.Sheknewmefor certain(thoughtheFoxsaidnot)beforethesecond. Thiswasthebeginningofmybesttimes.TheFox'sloveforthechildwaswonderful;I guessedthatlongbefore,whenhewasfree,hemusthavehadadaughterofhisown.Hewas likeatruegrandfathernow.Anditwasnowalwayswethree—theFox,andPsyche,andI — alonetogether.Redivalhadalwayshatedourlessonsand,butforthefearoftheKing, wouldneverhavecomeneartheFox.Now,itseemed,theKinghadputallhisthree daughtersoutofhismind,andRedivalhadherownway.Shewasgrowingtall,herbreasts rounding,herlonglegsgettingtheirshape.Shepromisedtohavebeautyenough,butnot likePsyche's. OfPsyche'sbeauty—ateveryagethebeautypropertothatage —thereisonlythistobe said,thattherewerenotwoopinionsaboutit,frommanorwoman,onceshehadbeen seen.Itwasbeautythatdidnotastonishyoutillafterwardswhenyouhadgoneoutofsight ofherandreflectedonit.Whileshewaswithyou,youwerenotastonished.Itseemedthe 16-May-06
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