Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds, Revised Edition

321 Pages·2009·3.51 MB·English

by  David C. Pollock

Praise for
Third Culture Kids
“As an adult TCK, I have long wrestled with how I fit into this world. This book is the
‘bible’ for anyone who wants to understand the blessings and the curses of growing up
multiculturally.”
—Wm Paul Young, author of the #1 New York Times Best Seller The Shack
“Growing up as a TCK has been a gift and has significantly shaped my life and work. As
I interact with world leaders one day and with those living in refugee camps the next, I
continually draw upon my experience of living among different cultures. I am delighted
to see the lessons learned from the traditional TCK experience live on in this new edi-
tion of Third Culture Kids.”
—Scott Gration, Maj Gen, USAF (Ret), President Obama’s Special Envoy to Sudan
“I called the first edition of Third Culture Kids ‘absolutely brilliant.’ This revised edi-
tion continues to earn that acclaim. It’s a powerhouse of a book through which readers
growing up ‘among worlds’—and their parents and the professionals responsible for
their care and teaching—become able to take leadership of the challenges and opportu-
nities presented by such a rich and complex childhood.”
—Barbara F. Schaetti, Ph.D., Transition Dynamics, second-generation
dual-national Adult TCK and lead author of Making a World of Difference.
Personal Leadership: A Methodology of Two Principles and Six Practices
“Because Third Culture Kids have been exposed to other cultures in significant ways
and have experienced multiple transitions while growing up, it is in their DNA to thrive
within the pace and nature of globalization. This book is a must to understand the chal-
lenges TCKs face and the unique skills they can leverage as global leaders.”
—Katrina Burrus, Ph.D., CEO of MKB Conseil & Coaching and
author of Global Nomadic Leaders: How to Identify, Attract, and Retain
“In today’s globalized and highly mobile world, the lessons to be learned from this new
edition of Third Culture Kids transcend mere cultural enlightenment about a unique
group of individuals growing up between worlds. This book is timelier than ever, and
should be essential reading for parents anywhere in the world raising cross-cultural
children.”
—Robin Pascoe, author of Raising Global Nomads:
Parenting Abroad in an On-Demand World
“This revised edition of Third Culture Kids opens up the topic of cultural hybridization
in new and exciting ways. By recognizing similarities between TCKs, children from bi/
multicultural parentage, children of immigrants, those who live on or near borderlands,
international adoptees and those forced into geographic and cultural transition through
war and/or famine, the author puts her finger on one of the most interesting, complex
and potentially most liberating aspects of our increasingly globalizing society. This
book opens up hope for dialogue, empathy, mutual learning and ultimately the joyful
acceptance of the diversity in us all.”
—Marc Levitt, storyteller, educator, and creator of www.thirdculturestories.com

Third
Culture
Kids
revised edition
Growing Up
Among Worlds
david C. Pollock
Ruth E. Van Reken
This trade edition first published by Nicholas Brealey Publishing in 2001. Revised in 2009.
20 Park Plaza, Suite 1115A 3-5 Spafield Street, Clerkenwell
Boston, MA 02116, USA London, EC1R 4QB, UK
Tel: + 617-523-3801 Tel: [phone]
Fax: + 617-523-3708 Fax: [phone]
www.nicholasbrealey.com
First published as The Third Culture Kid Experience by Intercultural Press in 1999.
© Copyright 1999, 2001, 2009 by David C. Pollock and Ruth E. Van Reken.
All rights reserved. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner whatsoever
without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embod-
ied in critical articles or reviews.
Printed in the United States of America
13 12 11 10 09 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Pollock, David C.
Third culture kids : growing up among worlds / David C. Pollock,
Ruth E. Van Reken. — Rev. ed.
p. cm.
Includes bibliographical references.
ISBN 978-1-85788-525-5
1. Social interaction in children—Foreign countries. 2. Social skills in children—Foreign
countries. 3. Children—Travel—Foreign countries. 4. Children—Foreign countries—Attitudes.
5. Intercultural communication—Foreign countries. 6. Parents—Employment—Foreign
countries. I. Van Reken, Ruth E., 1945– II. Title.
HQ784.S56P65 2009
303.3¢208209—dc22
2009024639
For Betty Lou Pollock and David Van Reken, our lifelong partners
and unfailing supporters throughout our journeys. And to our
children, who have taught us so much—TCKs “for true.”

Contents
Acknowledgments ix
Introduction by Ruth E. Van Reken xi
Part I Understanding the World of TCKs 1
1 Where Is Home? Erika’s Story 3
2 Who Are “Third Culture Kids”? 13
3 Who Are “Cross-Cultural Kids? 27
4 Why a Cross-Cultural Childhood Matters 39
5 Why High Mobility Matters 63
Part II The TCK Profile 85
6 Benefits and Challenges 87
7 Personal Characteristics 99
8 Practical Skills 111
9 Rootlessness and Restlessness 123
10 Relational Patterns 131
11 Developmental Issues 141
12 Unresolved Grief 159
viii Contents
Part III Maximizing the Benefits 167
13 Building a Strong Foundation 169
14 Dealing with Transition 179
15 Meeting Educational Needs 195
16 Enjoying the Journey 217
17 Coming “Home”: Reentry 225
18 How Sponsoring Organizations Can Help 239
19 It’s Never Too Late 249
Epilogue by Ruth E. Van Reken 267
Appendices
A Adult Third Culture Kids Survey Results 269
B Comparing Third Culture Kids and Kaigai/Kikoku-Shijos 279
Tribute: Remembering David C. Pollock, 1939 – 2004
by Betty Lou Pollock 287
Notes 289
Resources For TCKs, ATCKs, and their Families 297
Index 301
Acknowledgments
W
ithout Lois stück’s originaL encouragement, tran-
scriptions of seminar tapes, suggestions, and expert help throughout
the initial creative process of this book, it would have remained only a
dream. Without Professor Barbara Cambridge’s original guidance in the writing
process or Professor Jon Eller’s most helpful ideas about organization, the manu-
script would never have gotten back to Lois or our publishers. Thinking partner
and artist Barb Knuckles has shaped this book with her ideas and art. Karen
Allen, Kay Wilson, and mother Betty Frame have patiently read, corrected, and
proofed this text. Anthropologist Ken Barger; friends Margie Becker, Lori Beuer-
man, Christine Dowdeswell, Janet Fischer, Stephanie Hock, Brenda Keck, Ann
Kroeker, Erica Lipasti, Paul Pedersen, Paul Seaman, Alan Shea, Francisco West,
and Elisabeth Wood; wife Betty Lou Pollock; and daughter Stephanie Van Reken
Eriksen have all given most helpful suggestions while reading various drafts of
the manuscript. Helen Fail’s insights into international schooling have been in-
valuable. The list could go on and on.
Above all, without each TCK and ATCK who has shared his or her story with
us through the years, without the honest dialogue we have witnessed among so
many, there would have been no story to tell. In particular, we thank the Global
Nomad chapter at Valparaiso University for the time they gave to engage in dia-
logue specifically designed to address issues we are raising in this book. And a
huge thanks to “Erika” not only for letting us use her story, but also for helping
in the early stages of writing it.
And many thanks to David Hoopes for having the vision that this is a topic
whose time has come—to say nothing of his masterfully helping two people
join their different thoughts and writing styles into one text. He did not have
an easy job. Thanks also to Toby Frank for her further suggestions and Judy
Carl-Hendrick for substantial help in the final editorial process of the first edi-
tion. Without each of them this book couldn’t have been written in the readable
form we trust it now is. And now thanks to Nicholas Brealey for having the vision
to make this book more available to the public, to Trish O’Hare for her original
encouragement to update and expand this book, to Nicholas Brealey and Chuck
Dresner for agreeing, and to Erika Heilman and Rebecca Greenberg for their
ix