The Vile Village

275 Pages·2001·1.4 MB·English

by  Lemony Snicket

A Series of Unfortunate Events
BOOK the Seventh
THE VILE VILLAGE
by LEMONY SNICKET
Illustrations by Brett Helquist

Dear Reader,
You have undoubtedly picked up this book by mistake, so please
put it down. Nobody in their right mind would read this particular
book about the lives of Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire on
purpose, because each dismal moment of their stay in the village of
V.F.D. has been faithfully and dreadfully recorded in these pages.

I can think of no single reason why anyone would want to open a
book containing such unpleasant matters as migrating crows, an
angry mob, a newspaper headline, the arrest of innocent people,
the Deluxe Cell, and some very strange hats.

It is my solemn and sacred occupation to research each detail of
the Baudelaire children’s lives and write them all down, but you
may prefer to do some other solemn and sacred thing, such as
reading another book instead.

With all due respect,
Lemony Snicket
For Beatrice—
When we were together I felt breathless.
Now, you are.
CONTENTS
DEAR READER iii
FOR BEATRICE— iv
CHAPTER ONE
No matter who you are, no matter where you
live,… 1
CHAPTER TWO
When you are traveling by bus, it is always
difficult… 19
CHAPTER THREE
“Wasn’t that marvelous?” Hector said, as the
crows stopped circling… 47
CHAPTER FOUR
The Baudelaire orphans stared at the scrap of
paper, and… 69
CHAPTER FIVE
“My head is spinning again,” Violet said,
holding the scrap… 87
CHAPTER SIX
Although “jumping to conclusions” is an
expression, rather than an… 105
CHAPTER SEVEN
In this large and fierce world of ours, there are… 121
CHAPTER EIGHT 135
The next morning began with a colorful and
lengthy sunrise,…
CHAPTER NINE
There are not very many people in the world
who… 153
CHAPTER TEN
Entertaining a notion, like entertaining a baby
cousin or entertaining… 171
CHAPTER ELEVEN
“Isn’t it marvelous?” Klaus said with a grin, as
his… 193
CHAPTER TWELVE
If you have reached this far in the story, you… 213
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
The Baudelaires looked at the Quagmires, and
the Quagmires looked… 229
ABOUT THE AUTHOR AND ILLUSTRATOR
TO MY KIND EDITOR
A SERIES OF UNFORTUNATE EVENTS
CREDITS
COVER
COPYRIGHT
ABOUT THE PUBLISHER