The Sunday Times Magazine - 12 June 2022

70 Pages·2022·27 MB·English

June 12 2022
HENRY
KISSINGER
AT 99
Interview by
Niall Ferguson

10
12.06.2022
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The Sunday Times Magazine • 5

M A T T R U D D
The seven wonders of the
ancient world, as rated on Tripadvisor
S
ome 2,250 years ago, keen Tripadvisor signposting, she would have struggled. It’s not her fault
contributors Sandra and Nigel decided to tick — she just isn’t very good with charts.
off the seven wonders of the world …
Statue of Zeus
Lighthouse of Alexandria
I note a previous reviewer, the Roman general Aemilius
I wouldn’t normally travel any distance to see Paullus, was “moved to the soul, as if he had seen the
a lighthouse but everyone kept banging on god in person”, so I just want anyone else travelling to
about this one, so Sandra and I decided, what Olympia to manage their expectations. First of all, the
the hell? Big mistake. It was closed the chariot transfer from Paos does not take the advertised
morning we arrived, so we had to wait almost 55 minutes. It’s closer to 75. You then have to queue for
half an hour for the afternoon tour. The guide spoke more than an hour and they only let you have a few
only passable Pictish and gave us not nearly enough seconds in front the statue itself. Sadly, that’s more
time in the gift agora. More importantly, the light in the than enough time. All the gold and ivory is far too gaudy
lighthouse was just some burning logs. Avoid. for my taste. And what they don’t tell you in the
guidescrolls is that there is a guy permanently on hand
Great Pyramid of Giza to massage olive oil into Zeus’s very unrealistic
six-pack. Sandra, in particular, found this upsetting. In
If you’re going to call it great, then at least make sure fact, she was speechless. The guy claimed he was doing
it’s bigger than Sandra and I expected. Also, no one it to protect the ivory from the sun but his toga was
warned us how much sand there would be. Avoid. unnecessarily skimpy and he had no ID. Suspicious.

Mausoleum of Halicarnassus Colossus of Rhodes

When we arrived in Halicarnassus, it was almost This was much more like it. Three times taller than
30C. For some reason they had sealed Mausolus’s gaudy Zeus with his unnecessary masseur, Colossus
mausoleum, so Sandra and I were left to wander stands, well, colossal above the harbour in Rhodes. The
around outside where there was no shade. Our toilet facilities were adequate and the signage was clear.
luggage had gone to Gumusluk, so we had no sun Four stars then, except for what happened next. Sandra
cream and no sun hats. Most importantly, we’d paid and I decided to find a taverna in which to edit down
for speedy boarding but they only speedy boarded us our self-sketches (Sandra calls them skelfies but that
onto the transfer horse. From there to the chariots will never catch on). The drinks were far too strong.
it was a free for all. Avoid. I had to return to our inn early and Sandra had no
option but to spend the evening stuck talking to some
The Temple of Artemis guy who claimed his job was to massage olive oil into
statues. Not another one! When she finally returned,
Sandra and I are ahead of our time when it comes to she was visibly exhausted from having to listen to the
female empowerment — we both believe women are guy drone on about his probably imaginary job. Avoid.
almost as good as men — so we were looking forward
MY to this one. Sandra, in particular, admires Artemis, Hanging Gardens of Babylon
ALA goddess of the hunt, of nature, of the moon and young
NE, women. Much more inspiring than Aphrodite, goddess They’re called the Hanging Gardens of Babylon but
GAZI of Love Island. And her temple is great. Really clearly they weren’t hanging at all. They were terraced. Now,
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The Sunday Times Magazine • 7
R E L A T I V E V A L U E S
Angela Hartnett and Neil Borthwick
The married chefs on tardiness, clutter and why cooking together can be a “nightmare”
Angela me anything else, I’m not interested if a waiter served
Neil and I met years ago when he was a junior chef and the côte de boeuf instead of the rump steak. Go and
I was running the kitchen at the Connaught Hotel in talk to someone else about it.” Then the occasional time
Mayfair. He was a young pup, he looked about 12, but I do try to offload, he’ll start telling a story and I’ll say to
he was always quite confident and chatty. It was my first him, “No, it’s about me this time!” I don’t want us to be
proper head chef job and there was a very tight group of that couple that sits and moans about their jobs, though.
us who had worked there for a long time. Neil became a There are so many great things about what we do.
friend even though I employed him and we always had I’ve got four restaurants in London and three are run
lots of fun together. After four years working for me he by female teams. I’m all for bringing everyone into the
went to France, but we stayed in touch. industry but I like to think it’s the best person for the
Neil was working for the three-Michelin-star chef job. I think there are more female chefs now because
Michel Bras, so I went out to visit. He arranged a trip to it’s more accessible and the hours are better. If you
Paris, where we stayed in a hotel called Le Petit Palace. It want people to work for you, you’ve got to be flexible.
was not a palace, that’s for sure. When we stayed there I didn’t have that when I was coming up, but it didn’t
it was so hot and there was no air-con. That’s probably bother me. I was doing the job I really wanted to do and
why we ended up getting together. We were in this tiny I was fortunate enough not to experience sexism.
lift and the only thing we could do was kiss each other. When we’re cooking at home, Neil and I are big fans
We got together in 2009 but didn’t tell anyone for a of the old roast chicken and a load of salads. Nothing
while. I suppose we wanted to see how things went, but fancy, who the hell wants to be doing all this work all
also he’d worked with me and I’d recommended him to the time? I believe in one-pot wonders.
a fellow chef, so I didn’t want it to look like I was helping Eventually Neil and I want to move out of London.
my boyfriend. Eventually there was a lot of owning up We’ll find a little seaside restaurant where we don’t
to people. Those who knew us well were not surprised. depend on it for a massive income and if we want to
We tried for kids and it couldn’t happen, so I did say close for two weeks to go away we can. Something that
to Neil, “If this is something you really want, go and feels like coming round to ours for supper. Neil can do
meet someone else. Don’t let me hold you back or in
ten years’ time tell me you wanted kids.” I didn’t want
him to have that regret. Maybe then because of the “We married in the church near our
accident [Neil came off his bike in 2012 and was in a
house partly because it was the only
coma for five days] he thought he could live without
kids, I don’t know. You do reassess everything after that.
one Angela could make it to on time”
We were never bothered about getting married but
I said to Neil, “If we are going to do it, I don’t want to be
a 50-year-old bride.” I was coming up to my 50th four
years ago and that’s when he surprised me and asked.
I look at some people my age and I think they have
their lives sorted. They know when their bills are being
paid, they don’t miss flights. Neil and I are renowned
for running across airports screaming “Come on!” I’m
probably the worse timekeeper, but Neil will leave a trail
of destruction in his wake. If he needs a screwdriver
he’ll empty a cupboard, leave it all out and not think to
put anything back. That drives me doolally. But he’s so Main: Neil, 42,
honest, which is a lovely thing. So if he does screw up Angela, 53, and
because he has been disorganised, he always admits it. Betty the dog at
We’ve worked at making time for each other. I think home in east
we’re lucky because I’m my own boss and Neil’s London. Inset: at
restaurant, the French House, is always closed on their restaurant
Saturday and Sunday, which makes it easy for us to have Merchants Tavern
a weekend. I can come home and easily switch off from in 2015 — it closed
work, whereas Neil likes to offload and often repeats in 2020 due to the
himself, so I’ll be quite rude and say to him, “Do not tell pandemic
8 • The Sunday Times Magazine
P O R T R A I T B Y P A U L S T U A R T
the cooking. I wouldn’t work in the kitchen, it would be S T R A N G E church a few minutes from the house, partly because it
a nightmare. We’re not good at working together. It was the only church Angela would make it to on time.
H A B I T S
annoys me when he gets messy. If I’m honest Neil is Angela could not have been more supportive or caring
the better chef. Why not use your talent? when I had a bad bike accident nine years ago. I’ll take
Angela on Neil antiepileptic medication probably for the rest of my
Neil Neil gets life, but all in all, considering how close it was to being
People talk about Fergie time in football but we live by distracted easily the end, I’ve been very lucky. But I can’t be afraid to get
Angela Hartnett time. She tends to be running late a lot and I’m impatient back on the bike. The main thing for me is to get out,
but she always makes it just in time. A few years ago we so we wind each get the heart pumping and unwind from work stress.
were invited to Buckingham Palace and we only made it other up. When I’ve only worked in one kitchen that wasn’t a happy
in just before the Queen. Angela said to me, “If you tell he says “patience, one. The owner was just a very angry man. In my own
anyone about this we’re finished.” babe” or “chill kitchen I make sure I support everyone. One of the first
When we met at the Connaught 21 years ago, it was out” it drives me chefs I worked for told me, “If your staff are happy, your
my first time in London and I remember Angela being bloody insane customers are happy.” And he’s absolutely right.
full of energy when she was showing me round the Pasta is the nicest thing to have cooked for you and
kitchen. She probably thought, “Who’s this cocky little Neil on Angela Angela does make a fantastic bowl of it. We both like to
Scotsman? Let’s knock him down a peg or two.” Angela loves a cook at home, but if I start taking the initiative it’s no
We’re good together in a lot of ways. I always made binge watch. good. I do as I’m told to avoid a domestic.
Angela laugh and she’s full of personality. Annoyingly It’s her way of London is great but it’d be nice to move to the
she’s pretty much always right. She’s a sharp cookie and relaxing and she countryside one day. I think we’d be OK working
she definitely has her father’s strong Irish character. always has a new together again. We make a good team n
She’s always juggling 101 balls at one time. series on the go.
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The Sunday Times Magazine • 9
“ MUMMY,
COME GET ME.
COME GET ME”
Five years ago this week 72 people,
including 18 children, died in the
Grenfell fire. This is the definitive
and shocking account of the
mistakes and corporate cover-ups
that led to the disaster.
Martina Lees
By
10 • The Sunday Times Magazine