Here at last, a definitive how-to parenting guide that deals with everything from fixing up the nursery to dating outside the family. All the major concerns parents have, whether they have itty-bitty infants or teenagers smoking behind the garage, are addressed in this practical, easy-to-read manual. Topics include:
*Why Smokey and the Bandit is the best baby-sitting tool of all
*The use and care of snot rags
*Redneck go-carts—how to build 'em and maintain 'em
*Spam, and why it is considered nature's perfect food (note: tastes great with grap Kool-Aid)