Freedom. That's all I wanted. Freedom from baseball. Freedom from my dad. Freedom to do what I wanted.
Freedom to be me.
Instead, I found pain. Regret. Loss. Unfulfilled dreams.
No one tells you that the highway of freedom is paved with pain. Or that on your way to rock bottom you consider choices you know will destroy you, perhaps because you've already destroyed yourself.
Maybe what I really wanted was freedom from pain. And maybe true freedom only comes through pain.
For years I blamed God. I thought He was the problem. When they told me God loved me and would never let me go it was too hard to believe. Until it happened.