The Purity Myth: How America's Obsession with Virginity Is Hurting Young Women PDF
Preview The Purity Myth: How America's Obsession with Virginity Is Hurting Young Women
t he pu r it y my t h How America’s Obsession with Virginity Is Hurting Young Women j e s s i c a v a l e n t i Author of Full Frontal Feminism PurityMyth-3rdPages.indd 1 1/30/09 12:49:36 PM Pr aise for j essic a v ale nti “A gutsy young third-wave feminist.” —liesl schillinger, The New York Times “Valenti’s writing has a wonderful defiant quality reminiscent of the days of the movement’s youth.” —linda hirshman, The Washington Post “It’s hard not to love Jessica Valenti. The Brooklyn-based founder of Feministing.com—the uncompromising, balls-out, feminist blog—is brilliant, beautiful, and not even 30 years old.” —BUST magazine “Fierce and funny. . . . In-your-face feminism is what Valenti is about.” —antonia Zerbisias, The Toronto Star “[Feministing] it is head and shoulders above almost any writing on women’s issues in mainstream media.” —alissa Quart, Columbia Journalism Review PurityMyth-3rdPages.indd 2 1/30/09 12:49:36 PM for FUll Fr o nTal FeminiS m “Valenti writes slangy, profane and disconcertingly funny prose. She’s like the Fran Lebowitz of women’s rights . . . ” —rebecca traister, Salon.com “Valenti’s analysis is cogent and sharp.” —emma Kivisild, Herizons “ . . . an irreverent guide to why young women should embrace the F-word.” —emma Pearse, New York Magazine “Valenti’s book, packed with sound advice and solid research, is filled with enough wit and sass to convince young women that feminism is far from boring—that it is, in fact, necessary.” —Patricia justine tumang, The Women’s Review of Books PurityMyth-3rdPages.indd 3 1/30/09 12:49:36 PM The Purity Myth How America’s Obsession with Virginity Is Hurting Young Women Copyright © 2009 by Jessica Valenti Published by Seal Press A Member of Perseus Books Group 1700 Fourth Street Berkeley, California All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form without written permission from the publisher, except by reviewers who may quote brief excerpts in connection with a review. Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Valenti, Jessica. The purity myth : how America’s obsession with virginity is hurting young women / Jessica Valenti. p. cm. ISBN-13: 978-1-58005-253-5 ISBN-10: 1-58005-253-3 1. Young women—Sexual behavior—United States. 2. Virginity—Social aspects—United States. I. Title. HQ29.V338 2009 306.73—dc22 2008042226 Cover and Interior design by Domini Dragoone Printed in the United States of America by Maple-Vail Distributed by Publishers Group West PurityMyth-3rdPages.indd 4 1/30/09 12:49:37 PM f o r a n d r e w PurityMyth-3rdPages.indd 5 1/30/09 12:49:37 PM contents introduction .............................. 9 1. the cult of virginity .................. 17 2. tainted love ............................... 41 3. forever young ............................ 61 4. the porn connection ................. 81 5. classroom chastity .................... 101 6. legislating sexuality .................. 121 7. public punishments ................... 145 8. beyond manliness ..................... 167 9. sex, morals, and trusting women ......................... 185 10. post-virgin world ...................... 203 purity myth facts at a glance .... 217 questions for discussion ........... 221 notes ......................................... 223 resources ................................... 239 index ......................................... 251 PurityMyth-3rdPages.indd 6 1/30/09 12:49:37 PM “I believe that there is an ideal of fastidiousness in the world. An ideal of impossible purity in a world that is, in its very essence, impure.” m ar y g or d o n in I Need to Tell Three Stories and to Speak of Love and Death PurityMyth-3rdPages.indd 7 1/30/09 12:49:37 PM This page intentionally left blank PurityMyth-3rdPages.indd 8 1/30/09 12:49:37 PM i nt ro duc t ion there is a moral Panic in america over young women’s sexuality—and it’s entirely misplaced. Girls “going wild” aren’t damaging a generation of women, the myth of sexual purity is. The lie of virginity—the idea that such a thing even exists—is ensuring that young women’s percep- tion of themselves is inextricable from their bodies, and that their ability to be moral actors is absolutely dependent on their sexuality. It’s time to teach our daughters that their ability to be good people depends on their being good people, not on whether or not they’re sexually active. A combination of forces—our media- and society-driven virginity fetish, an increase in abstinence-only education, and the strategic political rollback of women’s rights among the primary culprits—has created a juggernaut of 9 PurityMyth-3rdPages.indd 9 1/30/09 12:49:37 PM
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