T HE MANUAL A True Bad Boy Explains How Men Think, Date, and Mate—and What Women Can Do to Come Out on Top Steve Santagati This book has been optimized for viewing at a monitor setting of 1024 x 768 pixels. The M a n u al M a n u al ATrue Bad Boy Explains How Men Think, Date, and Mate—and What Women Can Do to Come Out on Top STEVE SANTAGATI with Arianne Cohen o Crown Publishers New York Copyright © 2007 by Steve Santagati All rights reserved- Published in the United States by Crown Publishers* an imprint of the Crown Publishing Group, a division of Random House, Inc., New York. www.crownpublishing.com CROWN is a trademark and the Crown colophon is a registered trademark of Random House, Inc- Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Santagati, Steve. The manual: a true bad boy explains how men think, date, and mate—and what women can do to come out on top / Steve Santagati. — 1st ed. p. cm. 1. Men—Psychology, 2. Dating (Social customs). 3. Man-woman relation ships. I. Title. HQ1090.S326 2007 64677082—dc22 2006034128 elSBN: 978-0-307-39423-1 Design by Lauren Dong vLQ This book is dedicated to every woman who flirted with me, slept with me, slapped me, beat me at my own game, broke my heart or my ego, taught me "how to" and "how not to." To every woman who under stood me—who, in spite of myself, forgave me, dumped me, loved me, took care of me, befriended me, or tortured me. This book is dedicated to every curve of a woman's body, every lock of hair, every mischievous smirk, soft hands, lingerie, foreign accent, scream of outrage, sensitive vulnerability, beautiful kiss, warm hug, every body type out there, and everything that makes women the most beautiful creatures to look at and be around on the planet. Contents Introduction 1 Part I THE HEART OF THE BAD BOY Chapter 1 Who Is a Bad Boy? 6 Chapter 2 Who He's Not 9 Chapter 3 The Myth of the Nice Guy 12 Chapter 4 Do You Like Bad Boys? A Quiz 16 Chapter 5 How Bad Boys Bring Out the Best in Women 21 Chapter 6 The Nurture of the Beast 24 Part H INSIDE THE MALE MIND: HOW HE SEES YOU Chapter? Window Dressing 29 Chapter 8 The Rest of the Closet 31 Chapter 9 Halloween Tricks 36 Chapter 10 Bum's the Word 39 Chapter 11 Cleavage, and Other Reasons to Wear a Shirt Well 42 Chapter 12 Get a Leg Up 46 Chapter 13 Body Beautiful: Makeup, Don't Break Up 49 Chapter 14 The Tomboy: You Don't Have to Dress Up to Get Down Chapter IS Things Are Getting Hairy 54 Chapter 16 Shape Up, Shape Out 56 Chapter 1? Confidence Is Sexy! 59 Chapter 18 Porn Explained 62 viii Contents Chapter 19 Self-Confidence 66 Chapter 20 From Business Card to Bombshell 69 Chapter 21 Beauty and the Brains 23 Part III THE HUNT: BOYS ON THE TOWN Chapter 22 Moving in Fast 29 Chapter 23 What's My Line? 85 Chapter 24 Open for Business 24/2 88 Chapter 25 Practice Flirting 92 Chapter 26 Checkout 98 Chapter 2? An Exercise Bike Built for Two 102 Chapter 28 You Can Do It, and I Can Help 106 Chapter 29 Take the Plunge (and the Wave and the Jump] Chapter 30 Night Moves 113 Chapter 31 Love Online? 11? Chapter 32 Fly Like an Eagle with a "Wingman" 125 Part IV BOY MEETS GIRL Chapter 33 Datingon the Clock 128 Chapter 34 The Anti-Date 131 Chapter 35 Right Place, Right Time 134 Chapter 36 Head Games 138 Chapter 3? Tic-Tac-Yo 141 Chapter 38 Sext Messaging 148 Chapter 39 Tough Call 153 Chapter 40 Naughty by Nature 15? Chapter 41 Be a Tease 162 Chapter 42 Second Base 164 Chapter 43 Resist Arrest 166 Chapter 44 Spontaneous Combustion 169 Chapter 45 Laying the Groundwork 1?4 Chapter 46 Below the Belt 182 Chapter 4? Black Widows 189 Chapter 48 Auction Annie 197