The Japan and India Journals 1960-1964 PDF
Preview The Japan and India Journals 1960-1964
Japan and India Journals The Japan and India Journals i960—1964 Joanne Kyger Tombouctou, 1981 Copyright © Joanne Kyger, 1981 Cover collage by Ken Botto, from an original photo work by Sophie Calle. The author's thanks on this manuscript go to: Sophie Calle, Tom Clark, John Doss, Donald Guravich, Mary Ann Hayden, Alastair Johnston, Lewis MacAdams, Sarah Schrom, Wendy Welch, and Michael Wolfe. Designed, composed, and printed at the West Coast Print Center. Typeset from original journals by Mary Ann Hayden. ISBN 0-939180-01-4 Tombouctou Books Box 265 Bolinas, California 94924 Author’s Note Shortly after arriving in Japan, interrupting a bout of culture shock, Gary asked me, "Don't you want to study Zen and lose your ego ? " I was utterly shocked: "What! After all this struggle to attain one ? " I was in for a few struggles. Ruth Fuller Sasaki, founder of the First Zen Institute and abbot of Ryosen-an Temple at Daitoku-ji, Gary's sponsor in Japan, and then mine, sent a letter to Gary saying, "If you and Joanne want to marry at any time and then live in your little house in the mountains, fine. But living together in the little house before marriage won't do. There are certain fixed social customs that the Institute expects its members to respect." Thus I was mar ried almost immediately after my arrival and entered into the domain of housewife in Japan. A very new existence all the way around. "It sometimes seems like a chronicle of food and drink— were we really that sociable ? I guess so. I see people much less frequently these past years." A recent post card from Gary. Lots of stories are left untold, but what one writes down in a journal, is what remains, and who came over for dinner was largely my social life. And then the struggle with this thing called consciousness or "mind". Three bound volumes and four years later I was back in San Francisco, a bit wiser and a bit more disciplined, with the understanding that getting Zen was a very serious study indeed. But also, as Walter Nowick told me, Zen is sweeping the floor right. J.K. vii January i, i960 Unattractive party last night, at the Green Valley for break fast with poetry friends and to dinner with Philip and Lew at Pizza Place in North Beach exhausted. Herb said last night, why do you wear black stockings and all that eye make up ? 1.29.60 Confession merely enables you to go on acting like a coward, behavior does not change. As if self awareness then condones further actions of the same sort. conflict: why tension between wanting fame and rejecting the idea as shameful (Whalen and Duncan) 1.30.60. Saturday Leave tonight aboard Nachiharu-maru for Japan. February 1, i960 Rough day. Nagatani San Captain Kato Sanae Ishida 1 2.3.60 the wind shifts direction-the time making no difference now the elements dictate our course, work out a pattern like the pattern the flowers make or is it shadows that make a pattern on the wall. I am thinking of a woven pattern placed by hand of flowers. 2.4.60. Thursday Nagatani puts what, Dvorak? on the phonograph (the Dr. just brought the records in before lunch). For a moment I thought he was going to continue to play Beethoven's 9th from where I had left the room last night. He decides the music a bit too tempestuous and changes back to Pastoral, the 6th. I rather like the idea of his bustling around to please me. From 2.4.60: constant change one breaks like no other the top of the water breaks white. the mind rests upon them with ease expecting nothing from anything elemental 2 while in the sun we move a steady course with purpose brown albatross finally rest at noon .high on the water tops. (the alien elements join together. Mind—wind wind: depicted as man (old) blowing also bag of wind 2.5.60. Friday Sanae and I make origami paper birds out of a string of paper flags of the world and hang them on the electric fan over the table. The conversation is reduced to imbecilic mutters by the end of the afternoon. It has been so hot and stuffy inside yet we are unable to open the windows or go outside because of the roughness of the swells which knock constant water up against the windows of the boat. I decide to stay only a short time in Japan and not marry. I don't know what in god's name I am doing or why most of the time. The thought of the public baths petrifies me. Last night had a glass of beer with dinner and played gin rummy with the purser, the doctor, the chief engineer and Sanae. Nagatani san does my ironing for me and I wash my hair with difficulty under the fresh water faucet in the bath. The fresh water faucet is only about 11" from the floor. Dreamt last night of Stan Persky. Was with Margaret. We were in junk store and man was showing her how to stain the handles of blue velvet bag she was buying for me. You can't sand it, but have to apply stain over existing coat. Persky shows up with date, some young and pretty girl who 3
The list of books you might like
