The Don't Diet, Live-It! Workbook: Healing Food, Weight and Body Issues PDF
Preview The Don't Diet, Live-It! Workbook: Healing Food, Weight and Body Issues
Table of Contents Title Page Dedication Acknowledgements Introduction Chapter One - Outer Solutions vs. Inner Solutions Journey One Journey Two Journey Three Journey Four Chapter Two - Isolation vs. Reaching Out Journey One Journey Two Journey Three Journey Four Chapter 3 - Thoughts vs. Feelings Journey One Journey Two Journey Three Journey Four Chapter 4 - Stuffing vs. Acknowledging Feelings Journey One Journey Two Journey Three Journey Four Chapter 5 - Aggressive vs. Assertive Communication Journey One Journey Two Journey Three Journey Four Chapter 6 - Criticism vs. Praise Journey One Journey Two Journey Three Journey Four Chapter 7 - Black-and-White vs. Rainbow Thinking Journey One Journey Two Journey Three Journey Four Chapter 8 - The Binge/Deprive Cycle vs. Loving Limits Journey One Journey Two Journey Three Journey Four Chapter 9 - Emotional vs. Physical Hunger Journey One Journey Two Journey Three Journey Four Chapter 10 - Diet vs. Live-It Journey One Journey Two Journey Three Journey Four Chapter 11 - Weight Control vs. Natural Weight Journey One Journey Two Journey Three Journey Four Chapter 12 - Competition vs. Camaraderie Journey One Journey Two Journey Three Journey Four Chapter 13 - Holding On vs. Letting Go Journey One Journey Two Journey Three Journey Four Chapter 14 - Human Doing vs. Human Being Journey One Journey Two Journey Three Journey Four Chapter 15 - Endings vs. Beginnings Journey One Journey Two Journey Three Journey Four Appendix A - National Non-Profit Organizations Appendix B - Support Groups Appendix C - Web Sites Appendix D - Recommended Reading & Tapes Appendix E - Leading Live-It® Groups About the Authors Copyright Page This book is dedicated to ending food obsession and body hatred. In loving memory of: Jack Marcus Evelyn Grand Ida and Jack Wachter Adele and Julius Steinhauer and Neil Acknowledgments Marsea and Andrea would like to thank: • Santa Cruz O.A., without which this book would not be possible. • Dr. Bob and Bill W. for pioneering the path to recovery and Rozanne for making it available to compulsive eaters. • Geneen Roth, Carol Munter and Jane Hirschmann for pioneering the non-diet approach. • Stephanie Brown, an inspirational author and theorist who developed the stages of recovery for alcoholics. We used her stages as a model for people with food, weight and body issues. • All of the courageous clients in our groups for testing out these Journeys with their lives. • Laura Golden Bellotti and Deborah Abbott for their wonderful editing and cheer-leading. • Anya Abrams and Joel Primack for generously giving us our first computer. • Carol Inez Charney for her creative ads and graphic design for InnerSolutions. • Jennifer Chase for the many projects and errands she did for us, and advance thanks for many more to come! • Nancy Bazor for helping us get organized. • Eric Schoeck for his diligent and thorough help proofreading the manuscript. • Joan Barnes-Strauss for finding us and believing in us. • Jewish Family and Children’s Services of San Francisco for giving us another forum for our ideas. • Process Therapy Institute for their brilliant techniques and instruction. • Leigh Cohn and Lindsey Hall Cohn of Gürze Books for their impeccable timing in finding us and for taking this book on its next Journey. Marsea would like to thank: • All the people who loved and supported me when I could not love or support myself: Mom, Dad, Chris Parks, Miriam Goldberg, Morgen Alwell-Bartel, Juli Vinik, Erica Golden, Ellie Freedman, Gail Faris, Barbara Marcus, Lynette Marcus, Diana Grand, Sam Grand, the women of My Kin Talk, Bill Marcus, Stephen Grand and Andrea. • And the man who found me when I could: Jamie F. Amos. • Also, my honorary homies: Ken Bewick and Cynthia Strauss for being wonderful people. Andrea would like to thank: • An incredible group of friends and mentors who daily show me the way on my Journey. • My mom for her gift of empathy, my dad for his sense of humor and my whole family for their endless generosity, love and encouragement. • Marsea for many things, not the least of which is typing the entire book on her computer and never once complaining when I delivered chapters and ideas on little yellow Post-its! • Neil Brown, Stefanie Elkin and Robyn Wesley for, in their own unique ways, teaching me how to be a therapist. • Pam Gruen for her brilliant marketing skills and for always believing in me. Introduction As licensed counselors, with many years of experience leading groups and helping individual clients with food, weight, and body issues, we’ve long had an interest in creating a book to help others. At least as important as our professional credentials is the fact that we’ve both “been there” with food, weight, and body issues of our own. Having spent most of our lives in the grips of dieting, overeating, sneaking food, being fat and miserable, being thin and miserable (and being every weight in between), we each embarked on a Journey of Recovery. We use the word “Journey” here because we have found that recovery is a process, a Journey. It is not a single event, a destination, or a number on the scale. It is a way to live. The process involves changes, challenges, and insights. Much like traveling to any unknown location, it can be scary. The only reason that we were both willing to go on this Journey was that we had each come to a point in our lives where we knew we were at a dead end; our food compulsions, self-hatred and body obsessions had us trapped in a prison that had become intolerable. We discovered that the first necessity on our respective Journeys was to break our isolation. We each had thought we were the only ones who struggled so intensely with food and weight issues. There were no maps or directions on boxes of cookies or bags of chips to tell us where to go for help. And there was no one to guide us after our latest diet ended or failed. Fortunately, we were each led, separately, to a support group where we learned to be honest about our feelings, our eating and our lives. When we began to admit our problems to, and share our pain with, people in the group, we learned that we were not the only ones who suffered in this way. We discovered there were other people who had found or created maps with directions to guide them, and later us, on the Journey of Recovery. Next we learned that hating ourselves hindered rather than helped us in this process. We had always thought that if we could just get to the “perfect” weight, we would like ourselves and be happy. We now know that no weight is ever perfect enough to do the enormous job of creating happiness. We found that we had to first accomplish the difficult tasks of liking ourselves and treating
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