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The Bride's Etiquette Guide: Etiquette Made Easy PDF

209 Pages·2009·3.297 MB·English
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WEDDINGS t thE h Practical, down-to-Earth answErs E Br i dE ’s for all thE ModErn BridE’s quEstions B ttiiqquueettttee W r EE ith so many new bridal trends popping up and so much about i wedding etiquette in flux, today’s bride needs a guide that answers d her questions simply and clearly, without adding to the chaos and E increasing stress levels. The Bride’s Etiquette Guide unveils answers to a bevy of etiquette questions, covering everything from writing ’ s engagement announcements and coordinating the wedding G u i d E processional to introducing relatives at the reception and sending E out thank-you cards. This accessible, easy-to-read handbook is also t completely updated to reflect complicated contemporary issues such as: i q EtiquEttE Mad E Easy How can I let guests know about my wedding Web site? u Second Edition When should I mail save-the-date cards? E t How do I seat divorced and remarried parents at the ceremony and reception? t E And much more G Neither stuffy nor snarky, The Bride’s Etiquette Guide is a dependable voice that every bride can trust, whether she needs a complete u wedding crash course or just bits of advice on specific situations. Above all, it will help ensure a fun and stress-free wedding. i d also available E The Bride’s Thank You Guide L a $8.95 (CAN $9.95) c h ISBN 978-1-55652-940-5 50895 Pamela A. Lach 9 781556 529405 author of The Bride’s Thank You Guide t h E Br i dE ’s tiquette E G u i d E EtiquEttE MadE Easy Second Edition Pamela A. Lach Bride's Etiquette_FINAL.indd 1 1/28/09 4:27:23 PM Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Lach, Pamela A., 1954– The bride’s etiquette guide / Pamela A. Lach. p. cm. Includes index. ISBN 978-1-55652-940-5 1. Wedding etiquette. 2. Etiquette for women. I. Title BJ2051.L29 1998 98-18501 395.2’2—dc21 A variety of names have been used for the purpose of providing examples. Any similarity to actual people is purely coincidental. Cover design: Visible Logic Cover photo: Alexandra Grablewski / Botanica / Jupiterimages Interior design: Jonathan Hahn © 1998, 2009 by Pamela A. Lach All rights reserved Published by Chicago Review Press, Incorporated 814 North Franklin Street Chicago, IL 60610 ISBN 978-1-55652-940-5 Printed in the United States of America 5 4 3 2 1 Bride's Etiquette_FINAL.indd 2 2/11/09 9:03:52 AM Contents Introduction vii 1 1.Gñ eRttining� E tEiqnue�tate� e d 5 ñ Announcing the Engagement 7 ñ The Engagement Celebration 17 19 ñ2 D. eWfininedg dYionu�r WBeed�diinnngi nS�tysle 21 ñ Destination Weddings 22 ñ The Wedding Party 25 ñ What to Wear 31 ñ Wedding Web Sites 41 45 3. ñY oTuh eA Gruee sIt nLviistte d 47 ñ Save-the-Date Cards 52 ñ Wedding Invitations 54 ñ Wording on the Invitations 57 ñ Enclosure Cards 66 ñ Addressing Envelopes 69 ñ Assembling and Mailing Invitations 71 Bride's Etiquette_FINAL.indd 3 1/28/09 4:27:24 PM 73 4. Who ñD Woeesd dWingh Taitm?e tAabnled W75 hen? ñ Financial Responsibilities 80 ñ Wedding Responsibilities 85 89 5. Theñ W Firesdt dDienc�i sCionesr e m91ony ñ Selecting the Officiant 92 ñ Rehearsal 93 ñ Rehearsal Dinner 94 ñ Before the Ceremony 96 ñ Who Sits Where? 99 ñ Seating for a Double Wedding 101 ñ Usher’s Role 102 ñ Processional and Recessional 104 ñ Receiving Line 109 113 ñ6 .U nMiforimlist aanryd PWropeedrd Aintt�ire 115 ñ Special Customs 117 ñ The Arch of Sabers or Swords 117 119 ñ Cho7o.s inTgh Yeo Rur eRceecpetpiotinon Sty le 121 ñ Dinner Seating Arrangements 123 ñ Toasts 126 Bride's Etiquette_FINAL.indd 4 1/28/09 4:27:24 PM ñ Alcoholic Beverages 128 ñ Blessing or Grace 129 ñ Music and Dancing 130 133 ñ T8en. TMips afonrn Ienrtsr o1d0uc1tions 135 ñ The Proper Way to Introduce Someone 135 ñ All About Names 137 ñ Meal Manners 140 ñ The Proper Way to Eat Specific Foods 142 145 9. Givinñ� a Gnidft sR foerc Yeiovui n �1 4G7 ifts ñ Displaying Wedding Gifts 149 ñ Gift Registry 150 ñ Wedding Showers 152 ñ Gifts From You 155 ñ Tips and Gratuities for the Wedding 156 159 ñ1 0Gi.f t SAacykinno�w lTedhgamnekn tY Coaurds 161 ñ Thank-You Cards 161 ñ Deadline for Mailing 163 ñ Help with the Wording 163 167 ñ11 .H aCndolnintgr oDveifrfisciaullt SSiutubajteicotnss 169 Bride's Etiquette_FINAL.indd 5 1/28/09 4:27:24 PM 171 12. Whñen W Bedaddin gT Fheinar�ss H173appen ñ Broken Engagement 175 ñ Canceled Wedding 176 ñ Unexpected Death 177 A Final Note 179 Wedding Glossary 183 Index 197 Bride's Etiquette_FINAL.indd 6 1/28/09 4:27:24 PM Introduction This book is for every bride who is overwhelmed by all the ques- tions that she must answer; befuddled by the countless decisions that she must make; and frustrated by the contradictory and some- times self-serving advice that she receives. That’s you, isn’t it? You genuinely want to come up with the right answers and make suitable decisions. Yet you don’t have time to wade through a huge book every time a question arises, espe- cially when your life and your wedding plans don’t necessarily fit a perfect traditional mold. You need a bridal etiquette book because you only get married once—well, hopefully. There are traditions, customs, and practices that apply to a wedding celebration that are unfamiliar to you. There is no reason that you should know all of the answers. Planning a wedding has not been part of your daily life until now. Even the simplest wedding requires you to choose among options, answer questions, and prepare a plan. You need this source at your fingertips to guide you through the tangled network of information. So how do I know so much about weddings? Over the years, I’ve written four other wedding-related books. I learned about wed- dings the hard way: by attending and participating in them. After I saw the many fiascoes that occurred at those weddings, other peo- ple asked me to help them avoid such problems. Then their friends and relatives wanted assistance, too. I wrote down practical and vii Bride's Etiquette_FINAL.indd 7 1/28/09 4:27:25 PM IntroductIon viii realistic advice for wedding planning, saving money, writing thank- you notes, and surviving the initial years of marriage. An acquaintance, who didn’t know that some of my books were about this topic, was speaking about a recent wedding that we attended. Someone (not me) mentioned that the bride could have used a good etiquette book. The acquaintance responded, “Who cares about etiquette nowadays? Who needs to be told what to do by some stuffy prune wearing white gloves and a flowered hat?” You can imagine how I loved that comment! Actually I’m wear- ing jeans as I write this, and I’m neither prim nor pompous. And I haven’t worn white gloves or a flowered hat since I was six years old. From now on your wedding planning will be easier in many ways. This book is organized into twelve chapters. Each chapter discusses a large variety of questions and concerns and suggests traditional answers and solutions and adapts well-established cus- toms to more modern situations. In addition, a glossary explains common and confusing terms you may encounter. In this newly revised edition, I have added information on save-the-date notices, destination weddings, and wedding Web sites. Chapter 8 is a primer on manners to help get you through all the introductions, gatherings, and dinners—you’ll feel relaxed, confident, and ready to apply the basic etiquette principles to any special situations or unique cir- cumstances that relate to your wedding. And finally, in the back of the book, you will find a helpful index. Bride's Etiquette_FINAL.indd 8 1/28/09 4:27:26 PM 1 Getting Engaged Bride's Etiquette_FINAL.indd 1 1/28/09 4:27:27 PM

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