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The Art Of Living In The Green Zone PDF

200 Pages·2003·0.51 MB·English
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The Art of LIVING in your GREEN ZONE Lifelong-happiness and Relationships DR. K . SOHAIL M B B S F R C P ( C ) White Knight Publications 2002, Toronto, Canada Copyright ©2002 by Dr. K. Sohail, MBBS, FRCP(C) All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the author. Published in 2002 by White Knight Books a division of Bill Belfontaine Ltd. Suite 103, One Benvenuto Place Toronto Ontario Canada M4V 2L1 416-925-6458 e-mail: Dedicated to … The individuals, couples and families, who, throughout their therapy, inspired me to develop the healing philosophy of the Green, Yellow and Red Zones. Acknowledgements Special thanks to Anne Aguirre a co-traveller on my professional and philosophic journey, to Karen Petherick for her outstanding cover and text design and to my editor and friend, Bill Belfontaine, for his devotion to this book and unending sage advice. Contents Introduction Everyone Has A Special Gift .......................... 1 Part One Green Yellow Red Zones Chapter One Step by Step.................................................. 15 Chapter Two Recognizing Your Emotional Zones............ 25 Chapter Three Recognizing Your Communication Style .... 32 Part Two Green Yellow Red Zone Relationships Chapter Four Resolving Your Intimate Relationship........ 44 Chapter Five Back Together After a Painful Separation .. 51 Chapter Six Dissolving Your Intimate Relationship........ 59 Part Three Green Yellow Red Zone Systems Chapter Seven Family Zones ................................................ 68 Chapter Eight Work Zones .................................................. 83 Chapter Nine Social/Community Zones............................ 94 Part Four Journey From The Red Zone To The Green Zone Chapter Ten Nightmares ................................................. 101 Chapter Eleven Milestones of a Therapeutic Journey ........ 109 Part Five Living In The Green Zone Chapter Twelve People Who Choose to Live in Their Green Zone ..................... 145 Chapter Thirteen My Life and Dream..................................... 154 Chapter Fourteen Discovering One’s Green Zone.................. 157 Part Six Self-assessment Questionnaire................. 177 What People Say .........................................189 — 1 — Introduction Everyone Has A Special Gift When I was a young boy I was quite a dreamer, totally fascinated by the life stories of philosophers, artists, mystics and writers. I believed that they knew the truth, the ultimate reality, that they could heal suffering souls and provide insight into the dilemmas of human existence. I believed that those individuals changed the course of history and that they were ahead of their time. I thoroughly enjoyed their biographies and having passionate discus- sions about their lives and philosophies with all who would involve themselves in these discussions. In my imagina- tion, I enjoyed living amongst them, reaching out to know more, reaching out to the unknown. When I achieved my late teenage years, my mother encouraged me to become a doctor and I entered medical school with my thoughts concentrated on it as a healing profession. But soon I found myself in conflict. During daytime studies I was taught Anatomy, Pathology and Medicine and in the evenings my thoughts turned to the study of literature, religion and philosophy. I started writing T h e A r t o f L i v i n g i n Y o u r G r e e n Z o n e — 2 — short stories and poems as well, causing my mother to become upset. “Sohail! You have your Anatomy exam tomorrow and you are writing poetry. How is this going to help you pass?” I’d smile sheepishly and sometimes admit to my shortcomings; at other times I became quite angry at the attitude of this interfering, yet well-meaning and concerned woman. Fortunately, and with the help of a good recall system in my memory, I never failed an exam- ination, so our conflict never reached a crisis point. As a medical graduate some years later, I found myself at a crossroads with many dreams to be fulfilled. The first was to become a writer, the second to travel and experience the wide world, and finally, to specialize in a profession I loved. I could not envision myself practising medicine or surgery for the rest of my life. The specialization that would encompass all my interests proved to be psychiatry. Since this part of the healing art shares borders with medicine, psychology, sociology and philosophy and is ever enquiring, I chose this fascinating field for my life’s work. I found the ever-broadening subject forever exciting as it attempts to solve the mysteries of the human condi- tion. Solve one mystery and another would always appear waiting to be addressed. I was quite surprised, and some- what disappointed, that many medical graduates entered into psychiatry, not because they liked it, but because they could not achieve their goals in another specialization. Even after entering the psychiatric field I was less inter- ested in the physical functioning of the brain and more interested in the essence of human beings, the mind, the personality and the character. I was pleased to discover that the word “psyche” used to mean “soul” before it was transformed to “mind” by D r . K . S o h a i l

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