The Art Of Living In The Green Zone

200 Pages·2003·0.51 MB·English

by  Dr. Sohail

The Art of
LIVING
in your GREEN ZONE
Lifelong-happiness and Relationships
DR. K . SOHAIL M B B S F R C P ( C )
White Knight Publications
2002, Toronto, Canada
Copyright ©2002 by Dr. K. Sohail, MBBS, FRCP(C)
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or
transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical,
including photocopying, recording, or any information storage and
retrieval system, without permission in writing from the author.
Published in 2002 by White Knight Books
a division of Bill Belfontaine Ltd.
Suite 103, One Benvenuto Place
Toronto Ontario Canada M4V 2L1
416-925-6458 e-mail:
Dedicated to …
The individuals, couples and families,
who, throughout their therapy,
inspired me to develop the healing philosophy
of the Green, Yellow and Red Zones.
Acknowledgements
Special thanks to Anne Aguirre
a co-traveller on my professional and
philosophic journey,
to Karen Petherick for her outstanding cover
and text design
and to my editor and friend, Bill Belfontaine,
for his devotion to this book
and unending sage advice.
Contents
Introduction Everyone Has A Special Gift .......................... 1
Part One Green Yellow Red Zones
Chapter One Step by Step.................................................. 15
Chapter Two Recognizing Your Emotional Zones............ 25
Chapter Three Recognizing Your Communication Style .... 32
Part Two Green Yellow Red Zone Relationships
Chapter Four Resolving Your Intimate Relationship........ 44
Chapter Five Back Together After a Painful Separation .. 51
Chapter Six Dissolving Your Intimate Relationship........ 59
Part Three Green Yellow Red Zone Systems
Chapter Seven Family Zones ................................................ 68
Chapter Eight Work Zones .................................................. 83
Chapter Nine Social/Community Zones............................ 94
Part Four Journey From The Red Zone
To The Green Zone
Chapter Ten Nightmares ................................................. 101
Chapter Eleven Milestones of a Therapeutic Journey ........ 109
Part Five Living In The Green Zone
Chapter Twelve People Who Choose
to Live in Their Green Zone ..................... 145
Chapter Thirteen My Life and Dream..................................... 154
Chapter Fourteen Discovering One’s Green Zone.................. 157
Part Six Self-assessment Questionnaire................. 177
What People Say .........................................189
— 1 —
Introduction
Everyone Has A Special Gift
When I was a young boy I was quite a dreamer, totally
fascinated by the life stories of philosophers, artists,
mystics and writers. I believed that they knew the truth, the
ultimate reality, that they could heal suffering souls and
provide insight into the dilemmas of human existence. I
believed that those individuals changed the course of
history and that they were ahead of their time. I thoroughly
enjoyed their biographies and having passionate discus-
sions about their lives and philosophies with all who would
involve themselves in these discussions. In my imagina-
tion, I enjoyed living amongst them, reaching out to know
more, reaching out to the unknown.
When I achieved my late teenage years, my mother
encouraged me to become a doctor and I entered medical
school with my thoughts concentrated on it as a healing
profession. But soon I found myself in conflict. During
daytime studies I was taught Anatomy, Pathology and
Medicine and in the evenings my thoughts turned to the
study of literature, religion and philosophy. I started writing
T h e A r t o f L i v i n g i n Y o u r G r e e n Z o n e
— 2 —
short stories and poems as well, causing my mother to
become upset. “Sohail! You have your Anatomy exam
tomorrow and you are writing poetry. How is this going to
help you pass?” I’d smile sheepishly and sometimes admit
to my shortcomings; at other times I became quite angry at
the attitude of this interfering, yet well-meaning and
concerned woman. Fortunately, and with the help of a
good recall system in my memory, I never failed an exam-
ination, so our conflict never reached a crisis point.
As a medical graduate some years later, I found myself
at a crossroads with many dreams to be fulfilled. The first
was to become a writer, the second to travel and experience
the wide world, and finally, to specialize in a profession I
loved. I could not envision myself practising medicine or
surgery for the rest of my life. The specialization that would
encompass all my interests proved to be psychiatry.
Since this part of the healing art shares borders with
medicine, psychology, sociology and philosophy and is
ever enquiring, I chose this fascinating field for my life’s
work. I found the ever-broadening subject forever exciting
as it attempts to solve the mysteries of the human condi-
tion. Solve one mystery and another would always appear
waiting to be addressed. I was quite surprised, and some-
what disappointed, that many medical graduates entered
into psychiatry, not because they liked it, but because they
could not achieve their goals in another specialization.
Even after entering the psychiatric field I was less inter-
ested in the physical functioning of the brain and more
interested in the essence of human beings, the mind, the
personality and the character.
I was pleased to discover that the word “psyche” used
to mean “soul” before it was transformed to “mind” by
D r . K . S o h a i l