Stop the Screaming: How to Turn Angry Conflict With Your Child into Positive Communication PDF
Preview Stop the Screaming: How to Turn Angry Conflict With Your Child into Positive Communication
Stop the Screaming How to Turn Angry Conflict with your Child into Positive Communication Carl E. Pickhardt, Ph.D. STOP THE SCREAMING 99778800223300660066445566ttss0011..iinndddd 11 1100//2244//22000088 66::5522::4400 PPMM Also by Carl Pickhardt and from Palgrave Macmillan The Future of Your Only Child: How to Guide Your Child to a Happy and Successful Life The Connected Father: Understanding Your Unique Role and Responsibilities during Your Child’s Adolescence For more books by Carl Pickhardt, see www.carlpickhardt.com 99778800223300660066445566ttss0011..iinndddd 22 1100//2244//22000088 66::5522::4400 PPMM STOP THE SCREAMING HOW TO TURN ANGRY CONFLICT WITH YOUR CHILD INTO POSITIVE COMMUNICATION Carl E. Pickhardt, Ph.D. 99778800223300660066445566ttss0011..iinndddd 33 1100//2244//22000088 66::5522::4400 PPMM STOP THE SCREAMING Copyright © Carl E. Pickhardt, 2009. All rights reserved. First published in 2009 by PALGRAVE MACMILLAN® in the United States—a division of St. Martin’s Press LLC, 175 Fifth Avenue, New York, NY 10010. Where this book is distributed in the UK, Europe and the rest of the world, this is by Palgrave Macmillan, a division of Macmillan Publishers Limited, registered in England, company number 785998, of Houndmills, Basingstoke, Hampshire RG21 6XS. Palgrave Macmillan is the global academic imprint of the above companies and has companies and representatives throughout the world. Palgrave® and Macmillan® are registered trademarks in the United States, the United Kingdom, Europe and other countries. ISBN-13: 978–0–230–60645–6 ISBN-10: 0–230–60645–8 Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available from the Library of Congress. A catalogue record of the book is available from the British Library. Design by Newgen Imaging Systems (P) Ltd., Chennai, India. First edition: January, 2009. 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 Printed in the United States of America. Shortly before she died at age 97, my stepmother gave me a commission: “Read Heraclitus.” And so, like many times before, she set me on another path of understanding: That ancient Greek philosopher is the inspiration for this book, which I dedicate with gratitude to them both. This page intentionally left blank The poet was a fool who wanted no conflict among us. . . . From the strain of binding opposites comes harmony. —Brooks Haxton, Fragments: The Collected Wisdom of Heraclitus Conflict is a natural and even inevitable aspect of most ongoing close relationships. So the issue that differentiates successful from unsuc- cessful relationships is not whether there is conflict but, rather, how it is handled. —Daniel J. Canary, William R. Cupach, and Susan J. Messman, Relationship Conflict Though conflict is a human universal, so are efforts to reduce it. —Steven Pinker, How the Mind Works 99778800223300660066445566ttss0011..iinndddd 77 1100//2244//22000088 66::5522::4400 PPMM This page intentionally left blank CONTENTS Disclaimer 10 Acknowledgment 11 Introduction 13 1 Cooperation and Conflict 21 2 Emotion and Conflict 47 3 Communication and Conflict 71 4 Intolerance and Conflict 93 5 Resemblance and Conflict 121 6 Change and Conflict 145 7 Authority and Conflict 173 8 Compromise and Conflict 207 Appendix A: Behaviors to Avoid in Family Conflict 217 Appendix B: A Code of Family Conflict 219 Appendix C: In Case of Violence 221 Notes 223 Further Reading 229 Index 233 99778800223300660066445566ttss0011..iinndddd 99 1100//2244//22000088 66::5522::4400 PPMM
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