Single, Dating, Engaged, Married: Navigating Life and Love in the Modern Age

234 Pages·2018·1.05 MB·English

by  Ben Stuart

praise for
single. dating. engaged. married.
Ben is a dynamic voice for this coming generation. And apart from a correct
view of God, this subject will shape more of your life than any other.
—JENNIE ALLEN, FOUNDER OF IF:GATHERING AND AUTHOR OF
NOTHING TO PROVE
Scriptural. Helpful. Standout. In the flurry of conversation around singleness,
dating, and marriage, Ben Stuart charts a navigational framework of Scripture—
interwoven with story and statistics—that will help people of any age chart the
often choppy waters of relationships.
—LOUIE GIGLIO, PASTOR OF PASSION CITY CHURCH, FOUNDER OF
PASSION CONFERENCES, AND AUTHOR OF GOLIATH MUST FALL
Our happiness and health in life are directly proportional to our happiness and
health in our relationships. What Ben Stuart shares in this book might have more
influence on your life than anything else you will read this year.
—CLAY SCROGGINS, LEAD PASTOR, NORTH POINT COMMUNITY
CHURCH
Ben Stuart has more experience helping young adults discover God’s will and
direction for their relationships than anyone I know. Ben will inspire and equip
you to grow through each relationship stage and point you to God’s eternal
purposes.
—CRAIG GROESCHEL, PASTOR OF LIFE. CHURCH AND AUTHOR OF
FROM THIS DAY FORWARD: FIVE COMMITMENTS TO FAIL-PROOF
YOUR MARRIAGE
Every bit of life is demarcated by particular features, or characterized by specific
festivities, just like seasons in a year. I’ve learned that every demarcation,
whether festive or miserable, can be used powerfully by God. Ben Stuart does an
extraordinary job exploring and explaining how.
—DAVID CROWDER, RECORDING ARTIST
Ben Stuart has created a masterful relationship handbook for anyone who wants
to get from single to dating to married in a healthy way that is enjoyable instead
of stressful.
—SHAUNTI FELDHAHN, SOCIAL RESEARCHER AND BESTSELLING
AUTHOR OF FOR WOMEN ONLY AND FOR MEN ONLY
Young people today have an increasing challenge when navigating life from
singleness to marriage. Ben Stuart shows us that each season of our life—
singleness to marriage—is connected, and they mean more to God and our life
than we realize.
—CHAD VEACH, LEAD PASTOR OF ZOE CHURCH, LOS ANGELES
The road map that Ben so brilliantly lays out in these pages will lead you to
exactly where your heart truly wants to go. Dive in, friend. It will be worth it!
—SHANE BERNARD, MUSICIAN, WORSHIP LEADER, AND MEMBER
OF SHANE & SHANE
In an age when courtship is considered archaic, marriage postponed, and
intimacy expected at the mere swipe of the screen, Single. Dating. Engaged.
Married. is a much-needed anchor for those in the troubled waters of dating and
relationships.
—MARIAN JORDAN ELLIS, AUTHOR OF SEX AND THE SINGLE
CHRISTIAN GIRL AND STAND
Ben Stuart offers the church a needed primer on pursuing marriage in the
modern age.
—DR. RUSSELL MOORE, PRESIDENT, ETHICS & RELIGIOUS
LIBERTY COMMISSION
Ben masterfully uses Scripture to take us down a path of understanding what
God intended for man, woman, and marriage.
—JONATHAN POKLUDA, TEACHING PASTOR, WATERMARK
CHURCH, AND LEADER OF THE PORCH, DALLAS, TEXAS
This is an invaluable resource that will help countless young adults maximize
joy and minimize unnecessary pain while navigating the various stages of
romantic love.
—TIMOTHY ATEEK, EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR, BREAKAWAY
MINISTRIES
Ben is wise, authentic, humorous, and utterly effective at opening God’s Word
in ways that transform a soul.
—KEN WERLEIN, FOUNDING PASTOR, FAITHBRIDGE CHURCH,
HOUSTON, TEXAS
I’m confident that whatever stage of relationship you are in, you will benefit
from the wisdom put forth in this book.
—JAMIE IVEY, AUTHOR OF IF YOU ONLY KNEW AND HOST OF THE
HAPPY HOUR WITH JAMIE IVEY PODCAST
Ben Stuart tackles one of history’s most complex and confusing subjects with
clarity and candor.
—GREGG MATTE, PASTOR OF HOUSTON’S FIRST BAPTIST CHURCH
AND AUTHOR OF UNSTOPPABLE GOSPEL

© 2017 Ben Stuart
All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced, stored in a
retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—electronic,
mechanical, photocopy, recording, scanning, or other—except for brief
quotations in critical reviews or articles, without the prior written permission of
the publisher.
Published in Nashville, Tennessee, by W Publishing, an imprint of Thomas
Nelson.
Thomas Nelson titles may be purchased in bulk for educational, business,
fundraising, or sales promotional use. For information, please e-mail
SpecialMarkets@ ThomasNelson.com.
Unless otherwise noted, Scripture quotations are taken from the ESV® Bible
(The Holy Bible, English Standard Version®). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway,
a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights
reserved.
Scripture quotations marked MEV are from the Modern English Version.
Copyright © 2014 by Military Bible Association. Used by permission. All rights
reserved.
Scripture quotations marked NASB are from New American Standard Bible®.
Copyright © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by
The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. (www.Lockman.org)
Scripture quotations marked NIV are from the Holy Bible, New International
Version®, NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used
by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide.
www.zondervan.com. The “NIV” and “New International Version” are
trademarks registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by
Biblica, Inc.®
Scripture quotations marked NKJV are from the New King James Version®. ©
1982 by Thomas Nelson. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
Any Internet addresses, phone numbers, or company or product information
printed in this book are offered as a resource and are not intended in any way to
be or to imply an endorsement by Thomas Nelson, nor does Thomas Nelson
vouch for the existence, content, or services of these sites, phone numbers,
companies, or products beyond the life of this book.
ISBN 978-0-71809843-8 (eBook)
Epub Edition August 2017 ISBN 9780718098438
Library of Congress Control Number: 2017946407
ISBN 978-0-7180-9789-9 (trade paper)
Printed in the United States of America
17 18 19 20 21 LSC 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
Information about External Hyperlinks in this ebook
Please note that footnotes in this ebook may contain hyperlinks to external
websites as part of bibliographic citations. These hyperlinks have not been
activated by the publisher, who cannot verify the accuracy of these links beyond
the date of publication.
contents
introduction
first things first
1 // god, guys, & girls
single: devotion
2 // the purpose of singleness
3 // a singleness case study // the apostle paul
dating: evaluation
4 // who to date
5 // how to date
6 // sex
7 // a dating case study // isaac receives rebekah
engaged: union
8 // how to know that you know
9 // becoming one
10 // an engagement case study // solomon + the shulammite
married: mission
11 // marriage as a picture
12 // marriage as a pursuit: a case study // priscilla + aquila
conclusion
acknowledgments
notes