Shame and Jealousy: The Hidden Turmoils

178 Pages·2002·10.234 MB·English

by  Phil Mollon

Shame and Jealousy

The Hidden Turmoils
K A R N AC
SHAME AND

JEALOUSY
Shame and Jealousy is one of a series of low-cost books under
the title PSYCHOANALYTIC ideas which brings together the best of
Public Lectures and other writings given by analysts of the British
Psycho-Analytical Society on important psychoanalytic subjects.
Other titles in the Psychoanalytic Idea Series:
Dreaming and Thinking
Rosine J. Perelberg (editor)
Spilt Milk: Perinatal Loss and Breakdown
Joan Raphael-Leff (editor)
Psychosis (Madness)
Paul Williams (editor)
Adolescence
Inge Wise (editor)
The books can be ordered from:
Karnac Books
www.karnacbooks.com
Tel. +(0)20 8969 4454
Fax: +(0)20 8969 5585
E-mail: [email protected]
SHAME AND

JEALOUSY

THE HIDDEN TURMOILS
By
Phil Motion
Series Editors
Inge Wise and Paul Williams
KARNAC

LONDON NEW YORK
Published in 2002 by
H. Karnac (Books) Ltd,
118 Finchley Road, London NW3 5HT
A subsidiary of Other Press LLC, New York
Copyright © 2002 Phil Mollon
Phil Mollon asserts the moral right to be identified as the author
of this work.
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in
a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic,
mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the prior written
permission of the publisher.
British Library Cataloguing in Publication Data
A CLP. for this book is available from the British Library
ISBN 978 1 85575 918 3
Edited, designed, and produced by The Studio Publishing Services Ltd,
Exeter EX4 8JN
Printed in Great Britain
10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 21
www.karnacbooks.com
To a Bird Called Hope
The bird of hope landed softly on my perch,

With her sweet song she flirted,

And enchanted me,

Then spread her coloured wings,

And I pursued her,

Soaring high,

And low,

We rested in the forest,

Where she dallied with another,

Then the black knight of jealousy,

Riding roughshod in my heart,

Trampled her to death,

And I was ashamed.

Poem by "Pedro"—used with permission

CONTENTS

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS ix

PREFACE xi

CHAPTER ONE
Shame and jealousy 1

CHAPTER TWO
Further reflections on shame 23

CHAPTER THREE
Psychic murder syndrome 53

CHAPTER FOUR
Jealousy 77

CHAPTER FIVE
Shame in the psychoanalytic consulting room 123

vii

Concluding summary 139

A note on psychoanalysis for the general reader 143
Viii CONTENTS
REFERENCES 149
INDEX 159
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

I am extremely grateful to Inge Wise for inviting me to write
this book, and also for her encouragement over the years in a
variety of ways. This is also an opportunity to thank various
people whose support helped to sustain me during those times
when adverse circumstances made my own psychoanalytic journey
extremely arduous; many must remain nameless, but I would
particularly like to thank my analyst, Patrick Casement, and
supervisors, Eric Rayner and Harold Stewart; the support of my
wife, Ros, was also crucial. I would not have been able to write this
book without the excellent library services of both the Institute of
Psychoanalysis and the Lister Hospital. I would also like to thank
Lisa Willis for helpful comments on the manuscript. Appreciation
must also be expressed to the many patients who, in their
willingness to share their most private areas of mind, have enabled
the ideas and perspectives expressed here to emerge; without them
there could be no book.
ix