Sexual Development, Coping With Forbidden Feelings, and Relieving Sexual Arousal in Self-Ide

23 Pages·2015·0.32 MB·English

Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy
ISSN: 0092-623X (Print) 1521-0715 (Online) Journal homepage: http://www.tandfonline.com/loi/usmt20
Being Sexually Attracted to Minors: Sexual
Development, Coping With Forbidden Feelings,
and Relieving Sexual Arousal in Self-Identified
Pedophiles
Jenny A. B. M. Houtepen, Jelle J. Sijtsema & Stefan Bogaerts
To cite this article: Jenny A. B. M. Houtepen, Jelle J. Sijtsema & Stefan Bogaerts (2015): Being
Sexually Attracted to Minors: Sexual Development, Coping With Forbidden Feelings, and
Relieving Sexual Arousal in Self-Identified Pedophiles, Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, DOI:
10.1080/0092623X.2015.1061077
To link to this article: http://dx.doi.org/10.1080/0092623X.2015.1061077
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Copyright C Taylor&FrancisGroup,LLC
ISSN:0092-623Xprint /1521-0715online
DOI:10.1080/0092623X.2015.1061077
Being Sexually Attracted to Minors: Sexual Development,
Coping With Forbidden Feelings, and Relieving Sexual
Arousal in Self-Identified Pedophiles
JennyA.B.M.Houtepen,JelleJ.Sijtsema,andStefanBogaerts
DepartmentofDevelopmentalPsychology,TilburgUniversity,Tilburg,TheNetherlands
5
1
0
2
r
e
b Thisarticleaimstoprovidemoreinsightintopedophilicattractionandriskandprotectivefactorsfor
m
e offendinginnonclinicalpedophiles.Fifteenparticipantswereinterviewedaboutsexuality,coping,
pt and sexual self-regulation. Many participants struggled with acknowledging pedophilic interest in
e
S
0 earlypubertyandexperiencedpsychologicaldifficultiesasaresult.Furthermore,manycommitted
3 sexoffensesduring adolescence when they werestilldiscoveringtheirfeelings. Earlyrecognition
0
2 ofriskfactorsandearlystartofinterventionsseemvitalinpreventingoffending.Moreover,results
00: suggestthatriskforoffendingcanbediminishedbycreatingmoreopennessaboutpedophiliaandby
at providingpedophileswithsocialsupportandcontrol.
]
y
sit
r
e
v INTRODUCTION
ni
U
rg Pedophilia(orpedophilicdisorder)isdefinedintheDiagnosticandStatisticalManualofMental
u
b Disorders(5thed.;DSM-5;AmericanPsychiatricAssociation,2013)asthesexualattractionto
Til prepubescent children.Thissexualinterestisindicated byrecurrent,intense,sexuallyarousing
[
by fantasies,sexualurges,orbehaviorsinvolvingsexualactivitywithchildrengenerallyaged13years
ed oryounger,andmustbepresentforatleastsixmonths.Furthermore,thepersonmusthaveacted
d
a onthesesexualurgesorexperiencedsignificantdistressorinterpersonaldifficultiesbecauseof
o
nl them.
w
o There is ongoing debate about the etiology of pedophilia. Currently, pedophilia is viewed
D
as a psychological disorder with early life risk factors, such as early sexual behavior (Goode,
2010),historyofsexualabuse(Freund,Watson,&Dickey,1990),andprenatalorearlychildhood
neurodevelopmentalproblems(Blanchardetal.,2002;Cantoretal.,2004).However,pedophilic
interestseemsmorecommonincontemporarysocietythanmaybeexpected.Itisestimatedthat
3%to9%ofmalesincommunitysamplesareinsomewaysexuallyattractedtochildren(Wurtele,
Simons,&Moreno,2014).Furthermore,Seto(2012)showedrecentlythatpedophiliahasmany
similaritieswithsexualgenderorientation(i.e.,heterosexualandhomosexualfeelings),suchas
theearlyageofonset,thefantasyordesiretoengageinromanticbehavior,andthestabilityof
Address correspondence to J. A. B. M. Houtepen, Tilburg University, School of Social and Behavioral
Sciences, Department of Developmental Psychology, P.O. Box 90153, 5000 LE, Tilburg, The Netherlands. E-mail:
[email protected]
2 HOUTEPENETAL.
thissexualpreferenceovertime.Therefore,Seto(2012)suggestedthatpedophiliamaybebetter
consideredasasexualageorientationinsteadofamentalhealthdisorderorasexualpreference
thatischosenorsomehowlearned.
Thisviewiscontroversialgivenpreviousresearchintosexualattractiontominorsinindividuals
whohavecommittedchildsexualabuse.Thisresearchshowedthatchildsexualabusersmaybe
impulsive(Neutze,Seto,Schaefer,Mundt,&Beier,2011),haveantisocial,narcissistic,orpassive-
aggressive personality structures (Bogaerts, Buschman, Kunst, & Winkel, 2010), possess little
victim empathy, and have distorted cognitions supportive of having sex with children (Cohen
& Galynker, 2012; Marshall, Hamilton, & Fernandez, 2001). Yet, not all child sexual abusers
arepedophiles.Similarly,asbecomesclearfromthelastcriterioninthedefinitionofpedophilic
disorderintheDSM-5givenearlier,noteveryonewhoexperiencespedophilicfeelingsqualifies
5 for this diagnosis. However, if someone is experiencing significant distress because of intense
1
20 sexual fantasies involving children but has never had any physical contact with a child (and
er maybe never will), this individual can still receive the clinical diagnosis of pedophilia. Finally,
b
m evenpedophileswhoengageindeviantbehaviorshowgreatbehavioralvariationinthetypeand
e
pt severityofpsychologicalriskfactors.
e
S Inarecentreviewonchildpornographyoffending(Houtepen,Sijtsema,&Bogaerts,2014),
0
3 it was proposed that risk factors related to child pornography offending can be viewed along
0
2 the lines of two continua: (1) features related to criminal behavior; and (2) sexual deviance
0:
0 or fantasy. Furthermore, Schmidt, Gykiere, Vanhoeck, Mann, and Banse (2014) showed that
at differenttypesofchildsexualabusers(i.e.,intrafamilialchildsexualabusers,extrafamilialchild
]
y sexualabusers,andchildpornographyoffenders)differintheirdegreeofsexualdeviantinterests.
rsit Moreover, in their study, sexual deviant interest was negatively associated with factors known
e
v
ni tobeassociatedwithantisocialbehavior,suchaspsychopathyandsubstanceuse.Thissuggests
U thatsomeoffendersdonotengageinoffendingbecauseofantisocialtendencies,butratherdue
g
r to psychopathological factors related to deviant sexual interest. For example, according to the
u
b
Til abused-abuserhypothesisofsexualoffending,manyoffenderswhohavecommittedchildsexual
[ abusehavethemselvesbeenvictimsofsexualabuseinchildhood(e.g.,Burton,2003;Jespersen,
y
b Lalumie`re,&Seto,2009;Salteretal.,2003).
d
e Otherchildhooddifficultiessuchasbeingavictimofphysicalabuseand/orneglectarealso
d
oa reported among child abusers (Salter et al., 2003; Webb, Craissati, & Keen, 2007). Yet, it is
nl suggested that these risk factors are more related to sex offending in general than specifically
w
o tochildsexualabuse(Jespersenetal.,2009).Finally,intimacydeficits (Bogaerts,Vervaeke, &
D
Goethals,2004),lowself-esteem,loneliness(Henry,Mandeville-Norden,Hayes,&Egan,2010),
andothergeneralinterpersonaldifficultiesmayplayaroleintheetiologyofchildsexualabuse.
Forindividualshavinginterpersonalproblems,sexualactivitywithchildrenmayfeeleasierand
mayevokelessanxietycomparedtosexualactivitywithsame-agedpartners(Cohen&Galynker,
2009;Cohen,Grebchenko,Steinfeld,Frenda,&Galynker,2008).
Furthermore,somepedophilesmayengageinchildpornographyoffendinginordertorelieve
sexualarousalandhavedistortedcognitionsconcerningboththeimagesandtheactofwatching
(Surjadi,Bullens,VanHorn,&Bogaerts,2010).Thesecognitionsminimizethenegativeeffects
ofwatchingchildpornographicmaterialtotheextentthatsomepedophilesbelievethatchildren
werenotharmedinordertoproducethismaterial(Quayle&Taylor,2002).Moreover,pedophiles
oftenacknowledgehavingromanticandlovingfeelingsforchildreninadditiontohavingdesires
SEXUALATTRACTIONINSELF-IDENTIFIEDPEDOPHILES 3
toengageinsexualcontact(Seto,2012).Therefore,ithasbeensuggestedthatsomepedophilic
childpornographyoffendersarelesslikelytoengageinchildsexualcontactoffenseswhenthey
aredirectly(i.e.,insteadofindirectly,viawatchingchildpornography)responsiblefortheabuse
(Houtepenetal.,2014).
Becauseofthegreatstigmaassociatedwithpedophilia(Jahnke&Hoyer,2013;Janhke,Imhoff,
& Hoyer, 2015), some pedophiles may be troubled by their sexual interest (Freimond, 2013),
fearlosingcontrolovertheirfeelings(Hossack,Playle,Spencer,&Carey,2004),orexperience
difficulties in dealing with feelings that are “forbidden” in contemporary society. In order to
refrainfromoffending,thesepedophilesneedsufficientself-controlandsomeneedprofessional
helpinordertolearnbettercopingstrategiestorelievesexualarousal.
However, disclosure of sexual interest is a highly frightening activity for many pedophiles.
5 Even when they do find the courage to seek help, resources to provide pedophilic individuals
1
20 withsufficienthelparecurrentlylacking(Seto,2012).Thisisinpartbecausepreviousresearch
er onpedophiliahasfocusedmainlyonpedophilicoffenderswhoweresentencedtoimprisonment
b
m or compulsory treatment because of sex offenses (Capra, Forresi, & Caffo, 2014; Hall & Hall,
e
pt 2009). As a consequence, knowledge about pedophiles who have no criminal record or have
e
S not sought professional help is lacking. Although it has been suggested that many undetected
0
3 pedophiles have engaged in child sexual abusive behavior at some point in their lives (Neutze
0
2 et al., 2011), it is not clear what other (possible preventive) strategies these pedophiles use in
0:
0 ordertocopewiththeirsexualinterestandthesecretivenatureofthesefeelings.Hence,because
at thereislittleempiricalevidencetosupportthatthesameriskfactorsareinvolvedin“nonforensic
]
y andnonincarcerated”pedophiles,itisnotclearwhatfactorsotherthanpedophilicinterestresult
rsit inactualchildsexualabusivebehavior.
e
v
ni Inthis study we aimto contribute tothe understanding of pedophilia by providing more in-
U depthinsightintopedophilicattractionandriskandprotectivefactorsforchildsexualoffending
g
r innonclinicalandnonincarceratedpedophiles.Tothisend,weinterviewed15participantswho
u
b
Til acknowledgedhavingpedophilicfeelings.First,inordertoprovidemoreinsightintopedophilic
[ sexualdevelopment,weexaminedtheonsetofpedophilicinterest,thecontentofthisattraction
y
b (i.e.,theextenttowhichthereweresexualand/orromanticfantasiesanddesirespresent),andrisk
d
e factorsofpedophiliasuchasearlysexualbehaviorandhistoryofchildsexualabuse.Second,we
d
oa investigatedexperienceswithacknowledginghavingpedophilicfeelingsandcopingmechanisms
nl that are used in dealing with “forbidden” feelings and stigma. Finally, we examined behaviors
w
o to relieve sexual arousal, including self-reported offense behavior such as child pornography
D
offendingandsexualchildabuse.
METHOD
Participants
The sample comprised 15 self-identified males with pedophilic interest. All participants were
Dutch, except for one male who was Belgian. During the interviews, participants were asked
specific questions about the age group they were most attracted to. We found that two par-
ticipants could better be described as having hebephilic feelings; “hebephilia” denotes the
4 HOUTEPENETAL.
erotic preference for pubescent children, generally aged 12 to 14 years (Blanchard et al.,
2009), but is not recognized as an official diagnosis in the DSM-5. Also, during the inter-
view, three participants stated they had been convicted for child pornography offending in the
past.
After we sent an online request to participate in the study, 18 participants responded. After
we provided respondents with further information, three participants dropped out and did not
respondagain.
Procedure
5
1
20 Participantswereapproachedthroughanonlinerequestthatwasplacedontheforumsofthree
er DutchpedophilewebsitesinNovember2013.Onthesesites,peoplecandiscussissuesconcerning
b
m pedophilia.Inaddition,thesesitesprovideinformationonpedophiliafromavarietyofsources,
e
pt such as scientific literature. The main aim of these forums is to create more openness about
e
S pedophilia, and to provide support to individuals who know someone with pedophilic interests
0
3 orhavepedophilicintereststhemselves.
0
2 Furthermore, the requests were sent by e-mail to individuals who acknowledge having pe-
0:
0 dophilic feelings and were known to be active in self-help groups in the Netherlands at that
at time. Individuals who were interested in participating in this study could contact one of the
]
y researchersbye-mailortelephone,ortheycouldfilloutacontactformthatwasplacedonthe
rsit website of Tilburg University so they could be contacted to provide further information. After
e
v
ni participantsagreedtotakepartinthestudy,personalappointmentsweremadeviae-mail.Most
U oftheinterviewstookplaceatTilburgUniversity.Wechosethislocationbecausewefeltitwas
g
r a safe environment in which the anonymity of participants was guaranteed. However, some of
u
b
Til the participants preferred a home interview or were not able to travel to Tilburg University for
[ personal reasons. In two cases, participants were visited by the first and second author of this
y
b study.Inonecase,thesecondauthormetaparticipantatanotheruniversityintheNetherlands.
d
e All other interviews were conducted by the first author at Tilburg University. Interviews took
d
oa placebetweenDecember2013andJanuary2014.
nl The current study was conducted in accordance with the guidelines of the American Psy-
w
o chological Association (2010). Participants were first asked to sign an informed consent form
D
in which the purpose of this study was explained. Furthermore, participants were informed
that any disclosed information about previous or current offenses that were not yet known to
the police but potentially involved the safety of a minor would be reported to the authorities.
However, to guarantee the participants’ anonymity, we did not ask for any personal informa-
tion during the study. In one case, we suspected that a participant was currently constituting
a threat for engaging in sexual contact with minors, but he did not disclose any specific in-
formation about possible victims or abusive acts. After contacting organizations dedicated to
supporting victims of abuse, it was decided that he had not disclosed enough personal infor-
mation for identification, so further steps could not be made. All other responses were strictly
confidential and participants were able to withdraw from the study at any time. Participants
received a refund of all travel expenses and a gift voucher in the amount of 20 euros for their
participation.
SEXUALATTRACTIONINSELF-IDENTIFIEDPEDOPHILES 5
Interviews were recorded with the permission of the participants. One participant did not
want us to record the part of the interview where we asked questions about child pornography
offending.Audiorecordingsweredeletedaftertheinterviewsweretranscribed.
Measures
We made use of semi-structured interviews. Specifically, we developed a structured interview
questionnaire that was administered to all participants (see Appendix). We strongly empha-
sized the importance of answering the questions honestly. In addition to these questions, the
interviewerwasfreetoexploreimportantissuesmorein-depthifheorshefeltthatextrainfor-
5 mationwasneededinordertoobtainacompleteimageoftherespondents’motives,feelings,or
1
20 behaviors.
er Theinterviewquestionnairewasdevelopedonthebasisofinformationthatwehadpreviously
b
m collectedfromexploratoryinterviewswithlawenforcementandmentalhealthprofessionalswho
e
pt specializeinsexoffending(i.e.,fivepoliceofficersemployedintheprosecutionofsexoffenders
e
S andaforensicpsychologist).Weconductedtheseinterviewsinordertogetafullerunderstanding
0
3 of what is currently known about pedophiles in the forensic field. Furthermore, we aimed to
0
2 develop an interview that could fill some of the gaps in previous literature on the association
0:
0 betweenpedophiliaand(childpornography)offending(seeHoutepenetal.,2014).
at Each in-depth interview took approximately 45 minutes. We interviewed participants about
]
y demographic characteristics, their sexual preference, sexual development, coping mechanisms
rsit in dealing with pedophilic feelings, quality of life, and their ways of relieving sexual arousal,
e
v
ni including engagement in child pornography offending and child sexual abuse. Moreover, we
U asked specific questions concerning their online behavior in order to get more insight into the
g
r modusoperandiofthosewhoengageinchildpornographyoffending.
u
b
Til At the end of the interview, we asked participants if they felt we had overlooked important
[ aspectsoriftheywantedtoaddfurtherinformationtoanyofthesubjectsthathadbeendiscussed.
y
b Thefirstparticipantweinterviewedrecommendedthatweaddthefollowingquestion:“Ifachild
d
e is initiating physical contact, for example by cuddling, how do you react?”. We subsequently
d
oa addedthisquestiontotheinterviewsthatfollowed.
nl
w
o
D
DataAnalysis
In order to provide a complete overview of important issues in the interview data, first we
summarized participants’ answers per question. Second, we compared the different responses
and rated the number of participants who provided similar responses per question. Third, we
exploredthevalidityofthemainthemesviatechniquesthatarepartofThematicAnalysis(Braun
&Clarke,2006).Thatis,weretracted“latent”themesonthebasisoftheirprevalenceacrossall
interviews.
Weconcludedthatsomeofourthemescouldbedividedintosubthemes.Forexample,“Sex-
uality” was divided into “Onset of pedophilia,” “Content of sexual interest,” and “Early sexual
behaviorandexperienceofsexualabuse.”Moreover,weexplorednewthemes(e.g.,“Helpfrom
like-minded others” and “Help from nonpedophilic individuals”), and found that some themes
6 HOUTEPENETAL.
werenotreflectedintheinterviews(e.g.,“Socialnetworks,”whichconsistedmainlyofquestions
concerningonlinesharingofchildpornographicmaterialwithothers).Finally,weuseda“con-
textualist”modelforanalyzingourdata(Braun&Clarke,2006).Morespecifically,thismeans
thatweacknowledgedthewaysinwhichparticipantsattachedmeaningtotheirexperiencesby
placingtheirfeelingsandbehaviorsintoabroadersocialcontext.
RESULTS
BackgroundCharacteristics
5 Nine participants were highly educated (i.e., had either a bachelor’s or master’s degree), two
1
0 receivedintermediatevocationaleducation,twoonlyfinishedhighschool,andtwohadlessthan
2
r a high school education. Three were married or in a relationship at the time of the interviews,
e
mb andtwoweredivorced.Fiveparticipantshadneverbeeninvolvedinaseriousadultrelationship.
e Threeparticipantsreportedhavingchildren.
pt
e Twoofthe15participantscouldbetterbedescribedashavinghebephilicfeelings.Asidefrom
S
0 thedistinctionbetweenbeingattractedtoprepubescentorpubescentchildren,therewasstilllarge
3
0 variationinpreferredsexualageorientationbetweenparticipants.Forexample,someparticipants
2
0: withaninterestinprepubescentminorsacknowledgedbeingsexuallyattractedtochildrenfrom
0
at 5yearsold,whereasotherspreferredminorswhowereinthetransitiontopuberty.Furthermore,
y] notallparticipantshadanexclusivesexualinterestinchildren;ninewerealsoattractedtoadult
sit malesand/oradultfemales.Finally,eightparticipantsweresolelyattractedtoboys,threetogirls,
r
e
v andfourwereattractedtobothsexes.
ni
U Seven participants had experienced mental health problems. They were often troubled with
g feelingsofanxiety,depression,andinferiority.Forthreeparticipants,mentalhealthissuesstarted
r
u
b aftertheageof16.Theremainingfourhadalreadyexperiencedmentalhealthissuesearlyinlife.
Til
[
by SexualDevelopment
d
e
d
a OnsetofPedophilicFeelings
o
nl
w
o Elevenparticipantsdescribedbecomingawareoftheirsexualattractiontominorsasagradual
D
process.Theirsexualdevelopmentstartedrelatively“normal”atearlypuberty,whentheywere
still interested in their same-aged peers. However, as they became older, most (11) recognized
becomingdifferentfromothersbecausetheirsexualagepreferenceremainedstable.Others(four)
becameawareoftheirsexualattractionquitesuddenly,forexampleduringcontactwithminors
eitherinreallifeorbyseeingapicture.Sincethatmoment,allexceptone(seesectionCopingwith
ForbiddenFeelings)hadfeltthepresenceofthissexualattractionduringtheirlives,indicatinga
stablesexualpreference.
ContentofSexualInterest
Ten participants acknowledged that their attraction to minors was not solely sexual, but
that romantic feelings were also present. They reported falling in love with a child, and/or
SEXUALATTRACTIONINSELF-IDENTIFIEDPEDOPHILES 7
had fantasies about having a real romantic relationship with a minor. Also, when asked what
they found particularly attractive in minors, eight acknowledged that it was a combination of
both physical characteristics, such as “their beauty” or “bodily shapes,” and behavior, such as
“openness,”“spontaneity,”“honesty,”or“na¨ıvete´,”whereasonlyfourreferredsolelytochildren’s
appearances.
Moreover, 10 participants stated that having close relationships with children (e.g., friend-
ship or adult coaching role) was highly satisfying, for example, because it provided them with
the opportunity to make children happy. Especially for participants who acknowledged being
less sexually aroused because of their age (three, including two who were in their early to
mid-thirties), having close social contacts with minors was more important than the sexual
component. Furthermore, four participants stated that when they were less socially involved
5 with children, they felt more fixated on and troubled by their sexual interest in minors. Dur-
1
20 ing these times their need for intimacy and closeness was not met, and some argued that
er it was easier to imagine children as sexual beings when there was no real contact and dis-
b
m torted cognitions about children and sexuality were not contradicted by real life. Therefore,
e
pt social contact with minors seemed to serve as a preventive strategy against risks for offense
e
S behavior.
0
3 Incontrast,twoparticipantsarguedthatalthoughromanticfantasieswerepresent,thesexual
0
2 interest was most important. Moreover, two men in the study admitted having “romantic rela-
0:
0 tionships”withminorsinthepast,butmainlyfocusedontheirsexualengagement.Therefore,it
at seemsthattheirimageofbeinginlovewassomewhatdistortedorentangledwiththeirfeelings
]
y ofsexualarousal.Forexample,oneparticipantstated,“Thoseboysweretwelvewhenwewere
rsit dating. At that age I find boys attractive, but after two years they suddenly have this complete
e
v
ni sexualorgan...Atthatpoint,Iloseallsexualinterest.”
U Participants who were not interested in having romantic relationships with children stated
g
r forexamplethatchildrenwerenotasmatureintheircognitivedevelopmentastheywere;some
u
b
Til participantsreportedthattheydidnotfindtheunequalbalanceofpowerattractivebuthadfantasies
[ inwhichtheywerestillachildandhavingsexualrelationshipswithotherminors.
y
b
d
e EarlySexualBehaviorandExperienceofSexualAbuse
d
a
o
nl Eightparticipantsreportedhavingearlysexualexperiences(ages6to11years),rangingfrom
w
o discoveringmasturbation(one),to“playingdoctor”withotherchildren(four)andmoremature
D
sexualplaywithothers(one),toactualpenetration(two).Oneacknowledgedthatthisearlysexual
experience had in some way affected his sexual development, and argued: “This certainly has
mademethinkaboutsexualitytooearly,andIguessIwasfixatedonthisforquiteawhile.”One
oftheseparticipantsalsoreportedbeingsexuallyabusedinchildhood.
Fiveothershadtheirfirstsexualexperiencearoundtheageof12,includingonewhoacknowl-
edged being very sexually active at that age, engaging in sexual experiments with numerous
boyfriendsandgirlfriends.Fortheotherfour,sexualactsearlyinlifeonlyincludeddiscovering
masturbation. Finally, one admitted never having engaged in any real sexual activity to relieve
sexualarousal,includingmasturbation,andoneacknowledgedtohaveengagedinsexualactivity
inlatepubertyforthefirsttime.Hence,althoughearlysexualbehaviormayhavefixatedsome
participantsonsexualactivitywithchildren,forotherssuchaconditionedassociationbetween
childrenandsexualattractionseemstobenonexistent.
8 HOUTEPENETAL.
CopingWithForbiddenFeelings
RealizationofPedophilicFeelings
Reactionstotherealizationofpedophilicfeelingsdifferedfromverynegativetoextremelypos-
itive.Ingeneral,12participantshadstruggledwiththeirsexualattractioninsomeway.Somefelt
quitedisturbedwhenacknowledgingthattheterm“pedophile”fittheirsexualfeelings.Because
ofnegativeviewsbyboththemediaandthegeneralpublicandthesubsequentundifferentiated
flow of information concerning pedophilia, these participants were afraid of being stigmatized
as“monsters”or“childrapists.”Oneparticipantarguedthatpedophiliahasbecomemorecrimi-
nalizedovertime,leadingtomoresecrecy,rumination,andobsessionaboutpedophilicfeelings.
5 This participant also stated that when he was married, he “forgot” his pedophilic interest for a
1
20 while,whichsuggeststhatfixationdiminishedwhenhewasinameaningfulrelationship.Also,
er some participants felt ashamed and tried to suppress their sexual feelings altogether by using
b
m avoidant coping strategies, such as drug abuse. Three participants had little trouble accepting
e
pt their feelings, but were concerned about the opinions of others. Therefore, some participants
e
S experiencedahardtimekeepingtheirfeelingsasecret.
0
3 Finally,oneparticipantwasextremely positiveabout hissexual feelings.Althoughheknew
0
2 that his feelings were “wrong,” he thought of them as something honorable, because he “had
0:
0 alwayslikedgoingagainsttherules.”Indeed,heacknowledgedhavingproblemswithauthority
at from a young age, which led to problematic behavior such as dropping out of school and not
]
y beingabletoholdontoajob.
sit
r
e
v
ni ProfessionalHelp
U
g
r Thirteenparticipantssoughthelpwithprofessionals,like-mindedothers,orothermeaningful
u
b
Til individualsintheirenvironment.Sixparticipantshadsoughthelpfromaphysician,psychologist,
[ or sexologist, either to get assistance in accepting and/or coping with their sexual attraction to
y
b minors,ortogethelpwithsymptoms,suchasfeelingsofdepressionorloneliness,thatseemed
d
e partlytobetheresultofpedophilicinterest.Threearguedthatthishelpwasnotsufficientbecause
d
oa ofalackofclinicalknowledgeaboutpedophiliaingeneral.Foroneparticipant,thiswasalsoa
nl reasonfornotseekinghelpatall.Theotherthreearguedthatprofessionalsupporthelpedthem
w
o todisclosetheirfeelingsandaccepttheirsexualattractionbecausetheylearnedtoseparatetheir
D
sexualfeelingsfromsexualbehaviorand,hence,dissociatethemselvesfromstoriesabout“child
rapists”thathadtroubledtheminthepast.Incontrast,twoparticipantsfeltthatitwastoorisky
todisclosetheirsexualfeelingstoaprofessionalbecauseofthenegativestigmaofpedophilia.
Thestrugglewithpedophiliaalsobecameevidentwhenweaskedparticipantstoreporttheir
subjectivewell-beingonascalefromzeroto10,whichresultedinanaveragescoreof6.3(SD
=1.6;range:3–8.5;N =14).Oneparticipanthadtroubleexpressinghissubjectivewell-being,
butreported,“Currently,Iamnothappy.”
HelpfromLike-MindedOthers
Threeparticipantsfoundsupportthroughcontactwithotherindividualswithpedophilicinter-
est,forexamplebyvisitingself-helpgroupsorbyengagingin(online)contactwithlike-minded
SEXUALATTRACTIONINSELF-IDENTIFIEDPEDOPHILES 9
others.Furthermore,threeothersnotedthattheyjustenjoyedhavingsuchcontacts,becausethey
couldreallybethemselvesandtalkopenlyabouttheirfeelings.Someparticipantsarguedthatit
wastherecognitionofsharedfeelingsthatcomfortedthem,orthatothershadprovidedthemwith
thecouragetotalktoothernonpedophilicindividualsintheirenvironment.Finally,onefoundit
particularlyreassuringtoseethatmanyotherswithpedophilicinterestdidnotengageinsexual
behaviorswithchildren:“Theygivememoralsupport.Themediakindoftellyouthatyou’rea
tickingtimebomb,butthenwhenyougoonline...Youseemany‘tickingtimebombs’thatdo
notgooffatall.”
HelpfromNonpedophilicIndividuals
5 Elevenparticipantsalsodisclosedtheirfeelingstononpedophilicindividualstoreceivesocial
1
20 supportthroughothers’acceptanceortohavesomeonearoundwithwhomtheycouldbethem-
er selves. Some participants found it important that others know about their sexual preference so
b
m theycouldfunctionassafeguardswhentheparticipantswerearoundchildren.Eventhoughmany
e
pt in the study felt sure that they would not cross any legal boundaries, some felt safer knowing
e
S that someone else was able to give them feedback on their behavior. Similarly, one participant
0
3 acknowledgedthathepreferredtotalkabouthissexualfeelingswithnonpedophilicindividuals
0
2 thanwithotherindividualswithpedophilicinterestsbecausehefeltthatnonpedophileswerebet-
0:
0 terabletoevaluatehiscognitionsona“normal”level.Inturn,hethoughtthatotherpedophiles
at wouldjustconfirmalreadyexistingcognitions.
]
y
rsit NondisclosureandNegativityfromtheEnvironment
e
v
ni
U Twoparticipantshadneverdisclosedtheirfeelingstoothers.Onearguedthathedidnotexpect
g
r peopletobeaccepting,andbecausehewasnotlookingfordisapproval,hekepthisfeelingsto
u
b
Til himself.Furthermore,accordingtohimhisfeelingshadneverconcernedhimthatmuch.Theother
[ participantadmittedsomewhatproudlythathehadengagedinmultiple“romanticrelationships”
y
b withminorsinthepast,andthereforedidnotwantpeopletoknowabouthispedophilicinterest
d
e (i.e.,heargued,“Letsleepingdogslie!”).Finally,eightparticipantsacknowledgedthattheyhad
d
oa not only experienced social support when they disclosed their feelings, but that they had also
nl experienced somenegative reactionstotheirdisclosure.Althoughmostunderstoodthatpeople
w
o felt uncomfortable knowing that someone close to them had pedophilic interests, they argued
D
that this negativity contributed to secretive behavior which, in turn, may put some at risk for
committingsexoffenses.
RelievingSexualArousal
ChildPornographyOffending
Eleven participants admitted to having watched child pornography at some point during
their life. Eight participants argued that they downloaded child pornography years ago, often
in adolescence when they were still very sexually focused and/or were confused about their
sexual attraction to minors. Currently, these participants stated that they did not engage in