Counselling the Person Beyond the Alcohol Problem of related interest: Rehabilitation Counselling in Physical and Mental Health Edited by Kim Etherington ISBN 1 85302 968 8 Counsellors in Health Settings Edited by Kim Etherington Foreword by Tim Bond ISBN 1 85302 938 6 Parental Substance Misuse and Child Welfare Brynna Kroll and Andy Taylor ISBN 1 85302 791 X Good Practice in Counselling People Who Have Been Abused Edited by Zetta Bear ISBN 1 85302 424 4 Narrative Approaches to Working with Adult Male Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse The Clients’, the Counsellor’s and the Researcher’s Story Kim Etherington ISBN 1 85302 818 5 Addictions and Problem Drug Use Issues in Behaviour, Policy and Practice Edited by Mick Bloor and Fiona Wood ISBN 1 85302 438 4 Understanding Drugs A Handbook for Parents, Teachers and Other Professionals David Emmett and Graeme Nice ISBN 1 85302 400 7 Surviving Post-Natal Depression At Home, No One Hears You Scream Cara Aiken ISBN 1 85302 861 4 Counselling the Person Beyond the Alcohol Problem Richard Bryant-Jefferies Jessica Kingsley Publishers London and Philadelphia All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in any material form (including photocopying or storing it in any medium by electronic means and whether or not transiently or incidentally to some other use of this publication) without the written permission of the copyright owner except in accordance with the provisions of the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 or under the terms of a licence issued by the Copyright Licensing Agency Ltd, 90 Tottenham Court Road, London, England W1P 9HE. Applications for the copyright owner’s written permission to reproduce any part of this publication should be addressed to the publisher. Warning: The doing of an unauthorised act in relation to a copyright work may result in both a civil claim for damages and criminal prosecution. The right of Richard Bryant-Jeffries to be identified as author of this work has been asserted by him in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988. First published in the United Kingdom in 2001 by Jessica Kingsley Publishers Ltd 116 Pentonville Road London N1 9JB, England and 325 Chestnut Street Philadelphia, PA 19106, USA www.jkp.com Second Impression 2002 Copyright © 2001 Richard Bryant-Jeffries Library of Congress Cataloging in Publication Data Bryant-Jeffries, Richard. Counselling the person beyond the alcohol problem / Richard Bryant-Jeffries. p. cm. Includes bibliographical references and index. ISBN 1-84310-002-9 (pbk. : alk. Paper) 1. Alcoholics--Counseling of. 2. Client-centered psychotherapy. 3. Alcoholism--Psychological aspects. 4. Behaviour modification. I. Title. HV5275 .B78 2001 362.292’86--dc21 2001029758 British Library Cataloguing in Publication Data A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library ISBN 1 84310 002 9 Printed and Bound in Great Britain by Athenaeum Press, Gateshead, Tyne and Wear Contents DEDICATION 7 ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS 8 PREFACE 9 Introduction 11 1 Entering the World of Alcohol Use 25 2 Alcohol in the Family 45 3 Application of a Person-Centred Approach 71 4 The Cycle of Change 103 5 From Pre-Contemplation to Taking Action 133 6 Maintaining Change and Responding to Relapse 169 7 Bringing It All Together 193 8 Conclusion 217 REFERENCES 225 FURTHER READING 228 SUBJECT INDEX 231 AUTHOR INDEX 235 To Stuart, who helped me when I was younger but whom I could not help because I did not understand what an alcohol problem was Acknowledgements First and foremost I wish to acknowledge the clients with whom I have worked, who have brought me so much learning and who, in the final analysis, have been and are the true inspiration for writing this book. Hearing their experiences and their struggles, sharing in the process of formulating strategies for sustainable change, or simply being there with them as the one person who is listening, is a privileged position in which to be. My most important training ground has been, without doubt, the experience of working with the clients themselves. Without them, this book could not, and would not, have been written. Whenever I have mentioned to people that I am writing this book, I have consistently received positive responses. Clients, professionals and friends have all commented that there is a need for a book to help people access ideas and informed perspectives on problematic drinking that draws on person-centred ideas and the experience of working with people who are affected by it. This has contributed to my perseverance in completing this book. I would like to thank Tony Merry, Dave Mearns and Sue Wilders for their challenging and supportive comments on earlier drafts. I would also like to give thanks to Pippa Glassock, David Voyle, Patrick Coyne and the many others who have provided me with valuable feedback and encouragement. Finally, I want to thank Lynn Frances, my partner, who has contributed not only her editorial skills to the production of this book, but also consistent emotional support, especially during my periods of self-doubt and of wondering if it would ever come together. Her ability to be touched by the content of the book, and her belief in it has been a source of encouragement throughout. Thank you, Lynn. Note The dialogues with clients in the book are fictional. Any actual words of clients are reproduced here with the permission of those involved. Preface I do not know what prompted me to apply for the post of Primary Health Care Alcohol Liaison Worker and Counsellor with the Acorn Community Drug and Alcohol Service in Surrey, other than that it somehow felt right. I had not previ ously had experience of working with people with alcohol problems. It was late 1994 and I had recently left my job as a Fundholding Manager at a GP surgery in Guildford, having earlier completed my diploma training in person-centred counselling and psychotherapy. I had chosen the person- centred approach because it offered me a way of working with people that made so much sense. My training reinforced my belief in the importance of having genuine respect for other people. I experienced the reality of the ‘facilitative climate’ through which growth can occur. I was fired up with the ideas of Carl Rogers, keen to apply them in my new career of counsellor. It was while I filled in my application form that I knew it was the job for me. I had not previously thought of working in this area, yet looking back now I see that I owe a great deal to a past experience that I had thought was forgotten. Some years before, a manager of mine had had an alcohol problem and while aware of it I had no idea what to do, or how to help. The job application reconnected me with that experience. With hindsight, I could have done something. At the time, though, I was not in the right place within myself to offer anything; I certainly had no concept of how damaging and life-threaten- ing a serious alcohol problem can be. He died and somehow the seriousness of his drinking did not impress itself on me until his locker was discovered to be full of empty sherry 9
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