Naikan: Gratitude, Grace, and the Japanese Art of Self-Reflection

217 Pages·2001·6.099 MB·English

by  Gregg Krech

NAIKAN

NAIKAN
Gratitude, Grace, and
the Japanese Art of Self-Reflection
Gregg Krech
Stone Bridge Press • Berkeley, California
Published by
STONE BRIDGE PRESS
P. O. Box 8208, Berkeley, CA 94707
TEL [phone] • [email protected] • www.stonebridge.com
Text © 2002 Gregg Krech.
Calligraphy on front cover: “Naikan” by Ishin Yoshimoto.
Book design and layout by Linda Ronan.
All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced in any form without
permission from the publisher.
Printed in the United States of America.
10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
2006 2005 2004 2003 2002
LIBRARY OF CONGRESS CATALOGING-IN-PUBLICATION DATA
Krech, Gregg.
Naikan: gratitude, grace, and the Japanese art of self-reflection /
Gregg Krech.
p. cm.
Includes bibliographical references and index.
ISBN 1-880656-63-9
1. Naikan psychotherapy. I. Title.
RC489.M43 K743 2001
616.89’14—dc21
2001054927
“The unexamined life is
not worth living.”
SOCRATES
Dedicated to my parents, Ted and Michelle, who brought me into
this world from nothingness, and to my teachers, Rev. Kenryu Tsuji,
Rev. Shue Usami, Kinuko Yoshimoto, Akira Ishii Sensei, Masahiro
Nagashima Sensei, and David K. Reynolds, who escort me on the
return trip.

Contents
Preface 11
Introduction 19
What Is Naikan? 25
The Three Questions 26
Reflecting on Reflections 31
AN EXAMPLE OF DAILY NAIKAN: A Day of Reflection 32
Gratitude and the Practice
of Attention and Reflection in Everyday Life 35
Unwrapping Life’s Gifts 36
You Saved My Life 39
Ordering a Pizza 43
“IN THE MIDST OF PAIN” 47
Naikan at Work 48
Looking beyond Our Difficulties 52
Taking Things for Granted 52
Itadakimasu 55
The Expression of Gratitude 58
“THE TRAIN” 64
SAMPLE NAIKAN REPORT: A Man Reflects on Moving into a New
House 65
Giving to Others 69
Compassion and Attention 71
Strategies for Giving Yourself Away 73
Service Is Attention 75
Reconstructing Reality 76
Don’t Thank Me . . . 78
A Fable: The Giving Princess 79
A Moral Self-Examination 86
Benjamin Franklin 88
The Troubles We Cause 93
Lying and Stealing 97
An Appeal on Behalf of Guilt 100
Apologies 103
Beyond Forgiveness 107
“S(S)ELF-ESTEEM” 109
Even the Best of Intentions 111
Mysteries and Myths of Separation 114
Who Am I? 115
The Roots of Stuff 118
My Heart Is Your Heart 122
Illness and Faith 124
“PINE NEEDLES” 126
Intimate Attention 132
Gaikan: The Misdirection of Attention 134
Seeing Yourself through the Eyes of Your Partner 137
AN EXAMPLE OF NAIKAN: A Man Reflects on Himself
in Relation to His Wife 138
Attention to What’s Not There 141
A Fable: Giving, Receiving, and Desire-Ring 142
Relationships as a Vehicle for Training 145
“PLEASE REMIND ME” 147
Who Will Do the Laundry? 152
Two Different Worlds 152
The Practice of Naikan 155
The Naikan Retreat 156
Journal Naikan 162
Daily Naikan 162
Relationship Naikan 164
Naikan on Parts of the Body 165
Naikan Exercises 166
Reporting Our Naikan Reflections 168
Holidays: Opportunities for Reflection
and Celebration 171
“THANKSGIVING BLESSING” 177