My Years with Narcotics Anonymous

360 Pages·1.989 MB·English

by  Bob Stone

My Years
with
Narcotics Anonymous

by Bob Stone

Originally published and copyrighted in 1997 by
Hulon Pendleton Publishing L.L.C.
0-9654591-0-1

Revised and Reprinted by nahistorytree.com with permission
San Jose, California, November, 2013
In service to the members of Narcotics Anonymous

Manufactured in the United States

Dedicated to:
Bob Stone
His family and friends
All Narcotics Anonymous members, here and gone

i
Table of Contents
Editorial Preface (to this edition) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . iii
Appreciation and Recognition . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .vi
Introduction (Original by Ron H.). . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . vii
Chapter One A Miracle Begins . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1
Chapter Two (1950-1959) NA As We Know It . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 12
Chapter Three A Rebirth in 1960 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 27
Chapter Four (Late 60’s & 70’s) The Growth of a Fellowship . . . . . . . 37
Chapter Five The Early Seventies . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 52
Chapter Six The Middle Seventies . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 64
Chapter Seven (1978-1979) Just Getting Started! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .85
Chapter Eight (1980) Growing Pains . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 102
Chapter Nine Open Conflict – 1981 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 112
Chapter Ten (1982) “We Have a Book!” . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 130
Chapter Eleven (1983) Tumultuous Times . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .146
Chapter Twelve (1983) A New Beginning . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 159
Chapter Thirteen (1983-1984) The Busiest Time in My Life . . . . . . . .172
Chapter Fourteen (1984-1985) Staying a Second Year . . . . . . . . . . . . 189
Chapter Fifteen (1985-1986) Light at the End of the Tunnel . . . . . . .208
Chapter Sixteen (1986-1987) New Challenges . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .226
Chapter Seventeen (1987-1988) A Gradual Shift . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .243
Chapter Eighteen (1988-1989) An Exciting Year . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .269
Chapter Nineteen (1989-1990) The End Begins . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .292
Chapter Twenty I Was Stunned . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 315
Epilogue . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 323
Appendix . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 327
Index . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .333
ii
EDITORIAL PREFACE TO THIS REVISED “THIRD EDITION”

The First Edition of Bob Stone’s My Years with Narcotics Anonymous was published by Hulon Pend-
leton Publishing Company, L.L.C. Hulon Pendleton was the first and middle name of Bob Stone’s father.
Bob Stone died in 1995. The book was published in January 1997 under the auspices of the “Executive
Committee” of Robert W. Richart, William C. Winterfield, Bob Barrett, and Ron L. Hofius.
The “Second Edition” was “Re-printed with permission,” by Bo Sewell in Atlanta, Georgia.
This, the “Third Edition,” was produced in San Jose, CA by Paul S. and nahistorytree.com with the
permission of Bob Richart, William Winterfield, and Ron Hofius. A scanned PDF of the First Edition was
used. Pages 22 & 23 of that scan were missing so those pages were re-typed from the “Second” Edition.
Four chapters were re-typed by Debi R. from the scan. A PDF scan is no better than an image and cannot
be used to obtain clear printing. The majority was extracted and converted by using Able2Extract, a supe-
rior program to Adobe Acrobat Professional 11, for this process. Nevertheless, the conversion was not
perfect so every page and word had to be checked as well as reformatted.

EDITORIAL CHANGES
Index: My experience was that it was difficult to revisit references or research details of specific
events I had previously read. So I added an index to facilitate searching. In the soft copy much searching
can be done using Word search. However, the index also includes subject issues that do not necessarily
have key words. Creating an index was very time consuming and the result is not entirely thorough or re-
fined. The reader is welcomed and encouraged to send to [email protected] any corrections,
additions, and refinements to the index or the text.
For several reasons this book has a different size and formatting from the original. To help those who
have the First edition correspond pages with this edition, I have inserted into the text the original First edi-
tion page numbers in brackets in bold font such as this: {n}. The second edition also has a different paging
but it would be too laborious to refer to that paging.
To the Chapter headings I have added, in parentheses, the year or years that chapter covers when it is
not evident. Hopefully, this helps the reader in referencing events to the year.
Proofreading: In general, I reviewed Word’s Spelling & Grammar suggestions but these are not al-
ways correct and can be misleading. This editor almost entirely did the proofreading.
Punctuation corrections were made as follows:
Commas are always a problem especially since modern usage attempts to avoid commas particularly in
short initial prepositional phrases. I tried to determine whether the lack of such commas could lead to a
reader’s stumble in differentiating meaning and insert commas or not accordingly. When commas were
needed, were excessive, or in the case of typos, I added, or deleted as needed. I did not do this perfectly.
Stone’s brackets were replaced with parentheses. I reserved brackets for editorial notes as in [Ed. note:
This is a historical mistake].
Modern usage avoids hyphenated words so I removed hyphens in such compound words as “French-
speaking,” but retained them in such words as “fellowship-wide,” often going by intuition as to whether
there would be confusion in keeping or removing. Again, I did not do this perfectly.
Several times I removed colons or semi-colons and replaced them with a simple comma or period as
the case called for. Bob used “em” dashes excessively as parenthetical phrases so in some cases I thought
it better to substitute with parentheses or set the phrase off in commas.
Since page notes provide a formatting nightmare, I used different means to enter notes. If the notes
were my own they are entered as [Ed.: xxxx]. If the notes are Bob’s they are entered, [Stone: xxxx] in or-
der to differentiate these from his other parenthetical comments. Bob used parentheses profusely.
Grammar: Only minor grammatical changes were made in an attempt to keep Bob Stone’s style and
flavor and to give due respect to him as an author. The grammar check that Word provides suggested many
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My Years with Narcotics Anonymous
changes particularly in wordiness, the use of the passive voice, split infinitives, prepositional endings, con-
nective beginnings, contractions, and verbal arrangement. I refused to change these except for some obvi-
ous verb agreement problems. I did correct verb agreement such as “was” to “were” when the subject was
plural, or simply changed the subject’s plurality if that was a better choice. English usage calls for keeping
the same verb tense throughout a sentence so in some cases I changed a verb tense to agree with other verbs
in that sentence. I chose to ignore many of the other verb agreement errors in order to keep the text true to
Bob’s style and language. On occasion, I thought it best to actually clarify some language with the use of
an added or different word such as “each other” instead of “the other.” I did this reluctantly and only when
a small change could help.
Spelling: A few misspelled words were found and corrected. Occasionally, I had to insert an “of,” or
an “and,” or other short word to make the text clear. On page 325, First Edition, there was a mysterious
bracketed [RH1], whose meaning I could not decipher. So I left it in the text for fear of my own ignorance.
Readers are encouraged to suggest any other needed corrections to [email protected].

VISION AND ETHIC
Our goal is to provide an inexpensive edition of Bob Stone’s book for the fellowship. The intent is to
price the book at printing cost plus shipping and handling. There is no profit in this endeavor. Our time
and trouble are not being covered by monetary compensation. There is a reward but it is the reward of be-
ing able to repay with a living amends to myself, and to known and unknown others.
I use the term “our” or “we” because there were helpers and supporters to which this project was ac-
countable and certainly even if there were none, the editor does not stand alone. He was brought to this
point by others and by circumstances of god’s doing.
Why this book? The answer to that question should be in the reading and the consideration of its
magnitude and the back-story to its creation. I want to advise the reader to understand that I did not re-
print this book because of any notion that Bob Stone was either a saint or a devil. Some members believe
that Bob’s recount of his years in the WSO has inaccuracies and omissions; some even believe that Bob
hurt NA. Some believe that Bob saved NA from ourselves and to some degree are not willing or able to
think anything less of him. Some believe that Bob had a better understanding of our spiritual principles
than many of the members. Some think that Bob was over zealous in his attempts to take control from the
office or to direct the destiny of NA. Some think that Bob’s history is an attempt to whitewash his mis-
takes and to save his face. Yet Bob had a passion for NA. Strangely, it appears that after his death, the
memory of Bob faded away rapidly and his legacy seems to be mostly forgotten. Little was said about Bob
even after he was removed as Executive Director. His book also seemed to fade away from the attention of
the membership. Today, less than two decades later, it comes as a surprise to many who have been around
the same amount of time that the book exists.
I read Bob’s book slowly in the process of conversion and editing. My experience is that Stone him-
self revealed his own character, perspectives, assets, defects, and leanings, as well as those of other persons
closely involved in the 1980’s. The overarching fact, though, is that Bob wrote down a history for the fel-
lowship that has gone unmatched in detail and scope. Reading the book carefully revealed to me biases,
attitudes, omissions and commissions, inaccuracies and accuracies, and the largeness of the variable of
perspective. I gained as much or more than facts and events from between the lines.
What gain? If we cannot learn and understand from history, we are doomed to repeat history’s mis-
takes and wrong turns. My own political conclusions are not important. History should speak for itself.
And the historian’s relationship to history is also as much an integral part of, and significant within that
history. My best help is to only give the raw material for you to see and learn. I hope that many others can
see and gain, but that I cannot predict or control. But personally and individually, when I understand the
actions and reactions of others, I can better understand my own decisions, my own thinking, feeling, and
reactions. So knowing history can have a double blessing: It can provide hope for a group to walk forward
iv
having gained from the experience of the past. If that is or is not the case, I always have the opportunity as
an individual to see and actualize a better way of relating to others. This is true if I am willing and open
minded, no matter what the group sees or does not see, does or does not do. I have been able to ask myself,
what would I have done if I were in the position of Bob or others? Were there other ways to see and act on
the circumstances? What spiritual principles were ignored or which were actualized? What was sacrificed
and what was gained? What was undone and what was overdone? That has been my experience with this
book and I have personally learned much from this book specifically and from NA history in general.
My hope is that this book will stimulate further research and understanding of NA history. I hope the
reader will take the opportunity to examine the truth both in our fellowship and in the reader’s own feel-
ings, thoughts, and reactions. I have found that the history of NA is a microcosmic history of our nation
and also the history of humanity. To understand the forces within the formation and development of NA is
to understand the forces within humans and human relationships. As above, so below.

paul s. November, 2013

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My Years with Narcotics Anonymous
IN APPRECIATION AND RECOGNITION

Although I am only an editor, this work was not easy but it was facilitated with the help of many.

I am grateful to my wife, Tomilu, who patiently bore the loss of my presence while I buried myself in
working on this book.

Thank you Bill F., my good friend, who helped, encouraged and understood, and with whom I was able
to share a common appreciation of my discoveries in Bob’s book, and who looked for resources and
answers among the fellowship to questions that arose.

For his encouragement, belief in this undertaking, and going out of his way to help in obtaining permis-
sion for this reprinting, I thank Thom M.

Thank you Bob Ri., Ron H., and William W. for your past service and willing support.

Thank you, Chris K., my good friend, for nothing in particular but for much love and insight.

I am very grateful to all the members who have kept and held websites and other venues for NA history
such as Bo S., Boyd P., Chris B., Chris Keeley, Dale S., Danny M., Lester, Steve F.

Thank you Bob, for taking even your last days to help us and who I often felt was at my shoulder for
some unknown reason.

vi
INTRODUCTION
[Editor: This Introduction was written for and published with the original 1997 edition.]

I first heard the name Bob Stone in 1983. I was a member of Narcotics Anonymous living in the Up-
per Midwest with a few years clean, reading everything I could get my hands on published by NA world
services. NA had just published the Basic Text the previous year. Even from my somewhat isolated van-
tage point, living in a small struggling NA community far from California, it was obvious that the previous
year had been one of great controversy and difficulty for world services. With the first appearance of Bob
Stone's name on reports from NA's World Service Office (WSO), however, something was changing.
The publishing of the Basic Text was a watershed event for NA in many ways, one of them being that
we now had a vehicle by which to fund a serious World Service Office. Bob was hired during the 1983
World Service Conference to do that. He very quickly instituted the Newsline, a newsletter from the WSO
to the fellowship at large, and began communicating openly about the current state of affairs and the pro-
gress that was being made in developing the office.
Many of us who were in the trenches of the fellowship during those times had been feeling a mixture
of an exciting pioneer spirit on the one hand - our grass roots membership had written a book and were
building a service structure in places where there hadn't been one before - and on the other hand a nagging
fear that it just might all fall apart under the strain of our own controversies and inexperience.
In many local fellowships, members with much clean time often left NA, leaving the local groups
struggling. And to add to the feeling of instability, the Basic Text had been written and published amid
massive controversies and political fights, some of which seemed at times capable of tearing the fellowship
apart. It was a highly charged mixture of lofty aspirations and committed service, as well as strong-willed
personalities and bitter struggles. The voice of Bob Stone in those early Newslines and other reports was a
breath of fresh air. It was clear that he was visionary, confident, honest, and willing to wade right in and
tackle our most intractable problems. For many of us, Bob's voice brought renewed hope that NA was
turning an important corner. We were maturing as an organization.
My subsequent experiences of Bob were much more personal. I received a call from NA's World Ser-
vice Office in the summer of 1984. The call came right out of the blue, since their only experience of me
was in the form of a few articles I had written for the fellowship's magazine, the NA Way. After some ini-
tial questions about my qualifications, Bob came to the phone and we had a long conversation, much like I
later saw and heard Bob have with countless other members of NA. There was a lot of laughter and a real
sense that this was a guy with something on the ball who cared deeply for NA. I was impressed by both his
direct approach to business and his personal charm. By the end of the conversation, he had me talked into
at least coming out for an interview and having a look at the WSO.
I ended up taking the job, moving to California, and working for Bob and the WSO for five years.
From that vantage point I had the opportunity to witness first hand much of what Bob writes about in the
book. Those were thrilling, rewarding years for me personally and for the fellowship as a whole. Bob has
captured it quite eloquently in the pages that follow.
In 1993, long after both he and I had left the WSO, Bob discovered that he had incurable cancer. He
had the choice to undergo medical treatments, which held out some small hope of success, but he chose not
to do that. His position was that he would rather live to the fullest right up to the end than to endure the
pain and suffering that these particular treatments brought – and then probably die anyway. It was a deeply
personal decision for him, and one that many who loved him urged him not to make, but Bob was going to
be Bob: he was clear, and his commitment was unwavering.
He kept this information and this decision mostly to himself for as long as possible. Early on, howev-
er, he called me at my office one afternoon. After an unusually long and personal conversation, he told me
he had been diagnosed with cancer and would likely be dead in a year or two. After letting the shock of
vii
My Years with Narcotics Anonymous
that one sink in, he said he had one last goal: to write a history of NA. He asked me if I would work as his
editor and help him produce the book.

Throughout the years I knew Bob, I knew he was packing away documents and notes with the intent to
produce a history of NA one day. He was a real history buff, and he also had a keen interest in politics. He
had been involved himself on some level in city and county politics in LA. So he watched and participated
in NA's developmental journey with the eye of a historian and the people skills of a politician. He was
keenly aware that as time went on, the founding members of NA were getting more scarce. We were los-
ing the wealth of memories and experiences of early NA, and our ability to tell this story was slowly slip-
ping away. He made it his business to talk to these people, and to make notes of these conversations.
So when he learned of his terminal condition, he decided that he would spend his last year or two gift-
ing us with this book. He had no profit motive, since he knew he would be gone before it ever got to print.
He simply knew that he was in a unique position, being the non-addict and non-member of NA who had
the deepest personal experience and involvement with NA world services of anyone alive. No one else was
or would ever likely be in a similar position. As he had done about ten years earlier in accepting the job as
our WSO's Executive Director, he jumped right in. This book is the result.
It should be noted here that this book is being self-published. Hulon Pendleton Publishing has no affil-
iation with Narcotics Anonymous. Though we expect that many NA members will be interested in what
Bob has written, we hope and trust that NA's traditions will be respected in keeping this book separate from
NA, its meetings and its service structure. This is a book about, not by, Narcotics Anonymous.
The book has two parts. The first part is the result of an exhaustive research project on Bob's part. He
scoured the documentary evidence available to him, interviewed everyone he could find who was still liv-
ing and willing to be interviewed, and reconstructed the early years of NA as best he could. That was a
massive challenge, and he would be the first to say he may have gotten certain things wrong. Sometimes
memories differed, and other times memories agreed with each other, yet the documentary evidence
showed something else. In some cases, documents and recordings were even withheld from him by people
still hurt or bitter about certain events that happened during NA's more turbulent times. What he attempted
to do was to either simply admit those limitations and offer various versions, or to try to state the most
credible version based upon notes or articles from the day and consensus among those interviewed. In the
end, some will differ with his version of things. It is even possible that future editions of this book will
include corrections as more accurate documents become available. Bob was clear on that, though his ef-
forts to get it right the first time were exhaustive.
The second part of this book, starting in Chapter 11, is a first person account of Bob Stone's experienc-
es with NA. His first actual involvement was much earlier, in 1976 when he was asked to be the parlia-
mentarian of the first World Service Conference, and he speaks of those experiences in the first person as
well, but he shifts fully to a first person account when in 1983 he began to have a daily involvement with
world services as the Executive Director of the WSO.
Throughout both parts of the book, though it's obviously told from his own perspective, Bob attempts
to be fair and objective, giving credit where credit is due and holding back from personal attacks. Still, he
is open and forthcoming about the controversies and the personality struggles that were part of the fabric of
our fellowship's history. The struggles around the writing of the Basic Text, the entanglements, and fac-
tionalism which came to a head when Jimmy was replaced as the WSO Manager, the shock Bob experi-
enced when his own contract was ultimately not renewed. It's all there, and it is truly compelling reading.
The last personal note I'd like to add, and I know I speak for many, many people, even many of his de-
tractors, is a note of gratitude for the heart and soul of Bob Stone, which was dedicated to the service of
NA for so many years. I regret that he's gone and won't ever read these words of thanks, but we did take
many opportunities to express them over the years. At several of the World Service Conferences I attended
viii
while Bob was Executive Director of the office, all he had to do was walk up to the microphone and say,
"Hello, I'm Bob Stone," and the place would erupt in a raucous and sustained standing ovation. Though
there were voices and forces within NA who resented and resisted all his efforts over the years, and no one
agreed with his every action, the overwhelming sentiment was always love and appreciation for the many
gifts he brought to us.
Bob was never quite sure about this Higher Power we all talked about, but this Higher Power had no
such doubts about Bob. His heart was true, his commitment was phenomenal, and his immense contribu-
tion to NA will, I'm sure, never be fully understood or appreciated. Thank you, Bob, for being a mentor to
so many of us involved in world services throughout those years. Thank you for the genius you brought to
defusing our craziness and helping us organize our service efforts. And now, thank you for your final act
of generosity, your unique perspective on the history of our fellowship. For the guy who never did get
much rest throughout your highly charged and productive years with Narcotics Anonymous, may God rest
your soul.

Ron H., January 1997

[Editor’s note: Bob Stone had pancreatic cancer. He shared that with a few friends and family and in-
dicated that he would not undergo treatment. In the spring of 1995 he returned to the Los Angeles area
from a trip around the country. He stayed very briefly and then disappeared. In September of 1995, a hiker
found a badly decomposed body in the desert 12 miles southeast of Olancha in Inyo County, California.
The body was identified as Robert Bruce Stone. The coroner determined the cause of death as suicide.
You can find a more detailed report on nahistorytree.com.]

ix