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My Son Fred- Living With Autism: How Could You Manage? I Couldn't, I Did It Anyway PDF

193 Pages·2004·0.58 MB·English
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My Son Fred – Living with Autism of related interest Hurricane Dancing Glimpses of Life with an Autistic Child D. Alison Watt Photographs by Carole Ruth Fields ISBN 1 84310 792 9 Running with Walker A Memoir Robert Hughes ISBN 1 84310 755 4 Asperger’s Syndrome A Guide for Parents and Professionals Tony Attwood Foreword by Lorna Wing ISBN 1 85302 577 1 Parent to Parent Information and Inspiration for Parents Dealing with Autism or Asperger’s Syndrome Ann Boushéy ISBN 1 84310 774 0 Multicoloured Mayhem Parenting the many shades of adolescents and children with autism, Asperger Syndrome and AD/HD Jacqui Jackson ISBN 1 84310 171 8 Growing Up Severely Autistic They Call Me Gabriel Kate Rankin ISBN 1 85302 891 6 MIND Book of the Year 2001 My Son Fred – Living with Autism How could you manage? I couldn’t. I did it anyway Maud Deckmar Translated by Ewa Wulkan Jessica Kingsley Publishers London and Philadelphia All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in any material form (including photocopying or storing it in any medium by electronic means and whether or not transiently or incidentally to some other use of this publication) without the written permission of the copyright owner except in accordance with the provisions of the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 or under the terms of a licence issued by the Copyright Licensing Agency Ltd, 90 Tottenham Court Road, London, England W1T 4LP. Applications for the copyright owner’s written permission to reproduce any part of this publication should be addressed to the publisher. Warning: The doing of an unauthorised act in relation to a copyright work may result in both a civil claim for damages and criminal prosecution. The right of Maud Deckmar to be identified as author of this work has been asserted by her in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988. First published in 1998 in Swedish under the title of Freds Bok: En mammas berättelse om när livet vänder by Ord och Tanke, Trångsviken. This edition first published in 2005 by Jessica Kingsley Publishers 116 Pentonville Road London N1 9JB, UK and 400 Market Street, Suite 400 Philadelphia, PA 19106, USA www.jkp.com Copyright © Maud Deckmar 2005 Translation copyright © Ewa Wulkan 2005 Library of Congress Cataloging in Publication Data Deckmar, Maud, 1951- [Freds Bok. English] My son Fred—living with autism : how could you manage? I couldn’t, I did it anyway / Maud Deckmar ; translated by Ewa Wulkan.— 1st American pbk. ed. p. cm. ISBN 1-84310-312-5 (pbk.) 1. Deckmar, Fred—Mental health. 2. Deckmar, Maud, 1951- 3. Autism in children—Patients— Sweden—Biography. 4. Parents of autistic children—Sweden—Biography. I. Title. RJ506.A9D43313 2005 649’.154—dc22 2004019612 British Library Cataloguing in Publication Data A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library ISBN-13: 978 1 84310 312 7 ISBN-10: 1 84310 312 5 ISBN pdf eBook: 1 84642 115 2 Printed and Bound in Great Britain by Athenaeum Press, Gateshead, Tyne and Wear To my beloved son If your work and mine can give comfort to one single person or help just one person a step along the way the pain has not been in vain With my deepest love and respect Mummy To my family with love Contents Dear Readers 9 Chapter 1 Unto us a child is born… 11 Chapter 2 People around us 23 Chapter 3 Another baby – will I dare? 35 Chapter 4 “Just for today” is all I can handle 42 Chapter 5 As if he wasn’t there 52 Chapter 6 Lights – camera – action! 57 Chapter 7 Pre-school 63 Chapter 8 A few minutes of rest in borrowed peace and quiet or The difference between real solutions and makeshift ones 80 Chapter 9 School 88 Chapter 10 The children’s home 105 Chapter 11 It has always been us needing the staff – they have never needed us 116 Chapter 12 Are you a bad person when you can’t cope any longer? 127 Chapter 13 Moving to his own apartment 144 Chapter 14 The police report 158 Chapter 15 When a member of staff leaves – is it because he or she has died? 165 Chapter 16 He’s started at the day centre or The tale of budget and reality 169 Chapter 17 To forgive yourself 180 Chapter 18 My fears right now 187 Chapter 19 Moving on 190

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