Letters to a Young Therapist PDF
Preview Letters to a Young Therapist
Mary Pipher® THE ART OF MENTORING letters to a young therapist Stories of Hope and Healing by the bestselling author of REVIVING OPHELIA “Mary Pipher is like an old-time cours» soctoi, her black bag brimming with home remedies. She puts her finger on the pulse of America’s cultural neuroses.” — THE DALLAS MORNING NEWS A decade ago, Mary Pipher electrified readers with Reviving Ophelia, her best-selling investigation of America’s “girl-poisoning culture.” Now for the first time this gifted healer shares what she has learned in thirty years as a clinical psychologist who helps warring families, alienated adoles- cents, and harried professionals restore peace and beauty to their lives. Letters to a Young Therapist gives voice to Pipher’s practice with an exhilarating mix of storytelling and sharp- eyed observation. Much of what she tells us is profound in its simplicity: “Good therapy helps people be kinder, calmer and more authentic. They become more awake, more tol- erant and altruistic.” This intimate book tackles with honesty and compas- sion the challenges faced by all of us who struggle with trou- bled relationships, stressful jobs, too little time and too much to do. As Newsweek wrote, Pipher gives readers “a way to resist the worst of the culture around them and substitute the best of themselves.” Mary Pipher takes a refreshingly inventive approach to therapy—fiercely optimistic, free of dogma or psychobabble, and laced with generous wisdom. In an increasingly stressful world, she offers “therapy for our times,” showing us how to revitalize our emotional landscapes and get back to basics. Whether she’s recommending daily swims for a sluggish teenager, encouraging a timid husband to become bolder, or simply bearing witness to a bereaved parent's sorrow, Pipher’s warmth and insight shine from every pa: . | rerfully engaging guide to living a healthy life letters to a young therapist Also by Mary Pipher The Middle of Everywhere: The World’s Refugees Come to Our Town Another Country: Navigating the Emotional Terrain of Our Elders The Shelter of Each Other: Rebuilding Our Families Reviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls Hunger Pains: The Modern Woman’s Tragic Quest for Thinness Mary Pipher letters toa young therapist stories of hope and healing A Member of the Perseus Books Group The names and identifying details of all clients have been changed to protect confidentiality. Copyright © 2003 by Mary Pipher Published by Basic Books, A Member of the Perseus Books Group All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No part of this book may be reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews. For information, address Basic Books, 387 Park Avenue South, New York, NY 10016-8810. Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Pipher, Mary Bray. Letters to a young therapist: stories of hope and healing / Mary Pipher. p. cm. ISBN 0-465-05766-7 1. Psychotherapy—Miscellanea. I. Title. RC480.5.P544 2003 616.89'14—dc21 2003003603 03 04/10987654321 Dedicated to Fim Pipber and Jan Zegers, | my lifelong office mates BM Contents Acknowledgments 5 Introduction # Part 1: WINTER Breadcrumbs Virtues Mother Nature Delivers Family Bashing Deepening Therapy Connecting the Dots ParRT II: SPRING Pain Happiness Metaphor Endurance Self-Care Medication Dating ¥ii Contents Part ITI: SUMMER Marriage 95 Helping Cphelia’s Family 103 intentionality 113 Emotional Weather 119 Swimming 123 Danger 12? Therapy and Writing 133 PaRT IV: FALu Ethics 14] Story Doctors 147 Resistance 153 Failures 159 Healing Solutions from All Over the World 165 Yearning 169 Things Are Becoming Something Else 175 About the Author Iéf Vill
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