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How To Talk To Absolutely Anyone: Confident Communication in Every Situation PDF

231 Pages·2013·1.22 MB·English
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Table of Contents Endorsements Title page Copyright page Epigraph Dedication About the Author Foreword by Armand Beasley Introduction: Why You Should Want to Speak to Absolutely Anyone Communication Is All about Understanding We notice different things PART ONE: Common Fears and Barriers about Speaking to Absolutely Anyone 1: Fear – Does It Hold You Back? What Exactly Is Fear? Your Mindset – The Biggest Potential Barrier Conclusion 2: “I don't want to experience rejection” 3: “I worry about what other people might think” What Others Might Think of Your Interaction Conclusion 4: “I hate talking to strangers – why would I want to?” Why Bother Talking to Strangers Anyway? You Already Speak to More Strangers Than You Think Conclusion PART TWO: The Four Stages of an Interaction The Dynamics of an Interaction 5: Stage 1 – Your Outcome and Starting a Conversation Know the Outcome You Want! Being Clear about Your Reasons for the Interaction When/Where – Based on the Environment Other Environments Who – Who Do We Talk to Based on Who Looks Approachable? The curse of getting started 6: How – How Do You Mentally and Physically Approach? Own Your Environment Mental: Visualize Mental: The Other Person's Emotional State Mental: Frames Physical: How to Physically Approach Someone Physical: Getting Their Attention Physical: Opening Styles One More Thing 7: What – What Do You Say? Types of Opening Statements Pace Their Reality or Meet Them Where They Are! Spot the Start of Their Engagement Keep It Simple with People You've Never Met Before Topic Hints and Conversation Hijacking Avoid Classic Chitchat for too Long 8: Stage 2 – Creating Curiosity and Interest Leading Their Imagination The Power of Stories 9: Stage 3 – Making a Connection and Being Understood Being Understood – An Example “What's Important to You?” Making it Easier for People to Understand What You're Saying What Words Are They Using? Decision Strategies Dealing with Questions How Much Detail? The Balance of Consistency and Variety A Little Recognition and Appreciation Goes a Long Way Are You Really Listening? 10: Stage 4 – Get Them to Take Action Motivation Talk as if It's Going to Happen Capture Their Imagination Have the Expectation of a Good Outcome Go for It! Narrow Choices Are Best! Objections Conclusion Summary of the Stages of an Interaction PART THREE: Making Your Communication Even Better 11: Making Your Voice Work for You Tonality Speed of Talking Pauses Intonation 12: Common Pitfalls I Got a Bad Response and Didn't Know How to Handle the Situation Avoid Explaining too Much Use “But” with Caution Respond, Rather Than React 13: Difficult Work and Business Conversations A Difficult Meeting Broken Promises, Missed Deadlines and Similar Situations The Price Has Gone Up The Art of Delegating Work Done Badly Tricky Appraisals Resistance Dealing with Critical Comments “I'd rather not discuss that” 14: Final Thoughts Your “Zero to Hero Talk to Anyone” Development Plan Index “Part of my role includes being an expert witness on large renewable energy projects, so I know how important communication and words are. In his book Mark makes insightful observations and strings these together in a unique, refreshing and totally life-changing way. Perhaps the most powerful connection he makes is that our words and thoughts give rise to our feelings, and combining that with the effective strategies for conversation gives us a simply written, totally empowering and hugely inspiring book.” Sitara Keppie, Managing Director, Circle Design (UK) Ltd “We live in a world where both in our personal and business lives electronic communication has become the norm. It has been said that many people are actually losing the skill of simply talking to people. In this book, Mark Rhodes, in his easy-to-read down-to-earth style, gives all of us a solid framework to maximize our effectiveness in starting conversations in any situation naturally. In doing so he ensures we will achieve the outcomes we want. Thoroughly recommended.” Robbie Stepney, Managing Director, Calls That Count Limited “How to Talk to Absolutely Anyone goes way beyond the promise made in the title. An enlightening mixture of common sense and practical experience that is both extremely readable and implementable. Mark has brought to the book the same style that makes him such a great speaker at live events. The ideas for how to approach difficult conversations are a huge bonus, changing the focus to a win–win mindset.” Ray Noble, Editor, Your Excellency Magazine www.yourexcellencymag.com “In business, as in all walks of life, communication is vital whatever we are doing. Yet how often do we think about how to engage with others in the best way or how to enhance our skill set in this area? Mark, in his clear and engaging way, gives readers the opportunity to overcome their in-built fears, practice and improve their skills and learn new ones. Personally, I have learnt a great deal from Mark and have valued reading this book.” Peter Quilter, ACIB “This book shows you how to make your thinking work for you – not against you – so that you can talk successfully with anyone, anywhere. As has been said of Mark's previous book (on success) – keep it with you and read it over and over again!” Mark Henry, Corporate and Banking Partner, Birketts LLP “I have seen so many intelligent people held back by their weak communication skills, their fear of ‘speaking to strangers’ in a business environment. It is one thing to tell them they are needlessly being held back; what this book does is detail the practical route to overcoming these fears and being a better communicator – a kind of ‘sat-nav for stress-free mingling!’ ” Danny Clifford, Managing Partner, Ensors “As the world's largest Business Networking organization we know that communication, and the ability to be able to build relationships, is absolutely crucial for business and personal success. Mark has been the headline speaker for a number of our conferences and now brings his knowledge and experience in the area of communication to everyone in How to Talk to Absolutely Anyone.” Charlie Lawson, National Director, BNI UK & Ireland “Whatever age, background or stage of life you are at, Mark's positive voice of experience connects with you to deliver a myriad of real-life situations and solutions so you can develop the know-how to get the best out of communication, and get the best out of life!” Siobhan Eke, Director of Enterprise and Innovation Principalship, City College Norwich Cover design and illustration by Revert to Type © 2013 Mark Rhodes Registered office Capstone Publishing Ltd. (A Wiley Company), John Wiley and Sons Ltd, The Atrium, Southern Gate, Chichester, West Sussex, PO19 8SQ, United Kingdom For details of our global editorial offices, for customer services and for information about how to apply for permission to reuse the copyright material in this book please see our website at www.wiley.com. The right of the author to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, except as permitted by the UK Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988, without the prior permission of the publisher. Wiley publishes in a variety of print and electronic formats and by print-on- demand. Some material included with standard print versions of this book may not be included in e-books or in print-on-demand. If this book refers to media such as a CD or DVD that is not included in the version you purchased, you may download this material at http://booksupport.wiley.com. For more information about Wiley products, visit www.wiley.com. Designations used by companies to distinguish their products are often claimed as trademarks. All brand names and product names used in this book and on its cover are trade names, service marks, trademarks or registered trademarks of their respective owners. The publisher and the book are not associated with any product or vendor mentioned in this book. None of the companies referenced within the book have endorsed the book. Limit of Liability/Disclaimer of Warranty: While the publisher and author have used their best efforts in preparing this book, they make no representations or warranties with respect to the accuracy or completeness of the contents of this book and specifically disclaim any implied warranties of merchantability or fitness for a particular purpose. It is sold on the understanding that the publisher is not engaged in rendering professional services and neither the publisher nor the author shall be liable for damages arising herefrom. If professional advice or other expert assistance is required, the services of a competent professional

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