How People Grow: What the Bible Reveals about Personal Growth PDF
Preview How People Grow: What the Bible Reveals about Personal Growth
how PEOPLE grow Resources by Henry Cloud and John Townsend Boundaries Boundaries Workbook Boundaries audio Boundaries curriculum Boundaries in Dating Boundaries in Dating Workbook Boundaries in Dating audio Boundaries in Dating curriculum Boundaries in Marriage Boundaries in Marriage Workbook Boundaries in Marriage audio Boundaries in Marriage curriculum Boundaries with Kids Boundaries with Kids Workbook Boundaries with Kids audio Boundaries with Kids curriculum Changes That Heal (Cloud) Changes That Heal Workbook (Cloud) Changes That Heal audio (Cloud) Hiding from Love (Townsend) How P eople Grow How P eople Grow Workbook How P eople Grow audio How to Have That Difficult Conversation You’ve Been Avoiding Making Small Groups Work Making Small Groups Work audio The Mom Factor The Mom Factor Workbook Raising Great Kids Raising Great Kids audio Raising Great Kids for Parents of Preschoolers curriculum Raising Great Kids Workbook for Parents of Preschoolers Raising Great Kids Workbook for Parents of School-Age Children Raising Great Kids Workbook for Parents of Teenagers Safe P eople Safe P eople Workbook 12 “Christ ian” Beliefs That Can Drive You Crazy how PEOPLE grow What the Bible Reveals about Personal Growth DR. HENRY CLOUD DR. JOHN TOWNSEND Authors of Boundaries How People Grow Copyright © 2001 by Henry Cloud and John Townsend This title is also available as a Zondervan audio product. Visit www.zondervan.com/audiopages for more information. Requests for information should be addressed to: Zondervan, Grand Rapids, Michigan 49530 ISBN-13: 978-0-31-031956-6 ISBN-10: 0-310-31956-0 All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible: New ® ® International Version . NIV . Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved. Scripture quotations marked nasb are from the New American Standard Bible, copyright © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1977, 1995 by the Lockman foundation, La Habra, CA. Scripture quotations marked nlt are from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996 by Tyndale Charitable Trust. Occasionally italics are used in Scripture quotations for emphasis by the author. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, or any other—except for brief quotations in printed reviews, without the prior permission of the publisher. Published in association with Yates & Yates, LLP, Attorneys and Counselors, Suite 1000, Literary Agent, Orange, CA. Interior design by Todd Sprague To all those who have sought God and his growth path, and to all those who labor to help others grow. We are grateful for your hunger for him and his ways. CONTENTS Preface . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 9 PART I. PARADISE LOST 1) Harder Than I Thought . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 15 2) Seeing the Big Picture. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 26 3) How the Big Picture Affects the Small . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 41 PART II. THE MASTER GARDENER: THE GOD OF GROWTH 4) The God of Grace . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 63 5) Jesus: Our Example for Living . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 79 6) The Holy Spirit . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 94 PART III. FINDING THE BEST CLIMATE 7) God’s Plan A: People . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 117 8) Open Spaces: The Power of Acceptance . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 147 9) Getting to the Warmth of Forgiveness . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 161 PART IV. THE PATH OF GROWTH 10) The Gardener’s Handbook: The Bible . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 189 11) No Pain, No Gain: The Role of Suffering and Grief . . . . . . . 206 12) Growing Tasty Fruit: Becoming a Righteous Person . . . . . . . 235 13) The Value of Pruning: Discipline . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 249 14) Water from a Deeper Well: Spiritual Poverty . . . . . . . . . . . . 264 15) Following the Gardener: Obedience . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 278 16) Pulling the Weeds: The Problem of Sin and Temptation. . . . 293 17) Facing Reality: How Truth Deepens Growth . . . . . . . . . . . . 317 18) Putting on the Gloves: The Importance of Activity. . . . . . . . 332 19) Waiting for the Harvest: Time . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 346 Conclusion: Growth for Life. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 361 Notes . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 363 Index . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 364 4 4 This page is intentionally left blank. P r e f a c e f you have picked up this book, it is likely that you have some inter- est in the growth process. It could range from being curious about Ithe subject to a deep involvement in helping others grow. Whatever your reasons, welcome to How People Grow! We would like to explain briefly the reasons for this book: —To show that all growth is spiritual growth. Most Christians are aware of their need to grow. Some come to this point because they pos- sess a hunger and desire to know God and his ways better. Others are interested through a problem or crisis that has driven them to seek his paths. We believe that getting to know God more deeply, growing emo- tionally, and having better relationships are all matters of spiritual growth. God has designed a path of growth that leads us to him and his ways. As we learn and experience that path, we enter his life. This changes our entire existence, encompassing emotions, behavior, relationships, career, 9 h o w p e o p l e g r o w and everything else in life. We want people to learn that way for themselves. —To show that the principles of growth are in the Bible and its teachings. Many people are confused about the role of the Scriptures in their growth. They sometimes attempt to learn their religion and theology from the Bible, and growth and counseling from psychology. We believe that the Bible and its great doctrines teach the truths and principles people need in order to grow. The problem with many people is not that the truths aren’t in the pages of Scripture, but that they have not understood what it really teaches about growth. This book leads back to the Bible as the source for teaching about growth and healing. —To provide an overall approach to growth. Many people will get involved in a growth-based church, or start reading books about the subject. Yet there are few resources that provide a comprehensive approach to the growth process. As a point of background, we devel- oped this approach over many years of biblical and theological study and have worked on it with people in all kinds of contexts, including • Counseling settings • Churches • Denominations • Parachurch organizations • Businesses • Psychiatric hospital settings • Leadership settings All of our counseling, consulting, writing, and speaking is based on this system of biblical growth. Each one of our books, for example, is about some aspect of life or growth that comes from the approach: a brick from the house, so to speak. After we had taught on these matters for a few years, people started asking us to write about the system of growth as a whole. They wanted to know what the architecture of the entire house looked like. We agreed with that interest, and this book is the result. —To help those helping others grow. Not only do we want to see people learn about spiritual growth, but we want to provide a tool for those facilitating growth in others. This includes the following: 10
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