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Handbook of the Psychology of Self-Forgiveness PDF

372 Pages·2017·5.222 MB·English
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Lydia Woodyatt  Everett L. Worthington, Jr. Michael Wenzel · Brandon J. Griffi n Editors Handbook of the Psychology of Self- Forgiveness Handbook of the Psychology of Self-Forgiveness Lydia Woodyatt • Everett L. Worthington Jr. Michael Wenzel • Brandon J. Griffin Editors Handbook of the Psychology of Self-Forgiveness Editors Lydia Woodyatt Everett L. Worthington Jr. School of Psychology Department of Psychology Flinders University of South Australia Virginia Commonwealth University Adelaide, SA, Australia Richmond, VA, USA Michael Wenzel Brandon J. Griffin School of Psychology San Francisco Veterans Affairs Medical Center Flinders University of South Australia San Francisco, CA, USA Adelaide, SA, Australia ISBN 978-3-319-60572-2 ISBN 978-3-319-60573-9 (eBook) DOI 10.1007/978-3-319-60573-9 Library of Congress Control Number: 2017953384 © Springer International Publishing AG 2017 This work is subject to copyright. All rights are reserved by the Publisher, whether the whole or part of the material is concerned, specifically the rights of translation, reprinting, reuse of illustrations, recitation, broadcasting, reproduction on microfilms or in any other physical way, and transmission or information storage and retrieval, electronic adaptation, computer software, or by similar or dissimilar methodology now known or hereafter developed. The use of general descriptive names, registered names, trademarks, service marks, etc. in this publication does not imply, even in the absence of a specific statement, that such names are exempt from the relevant protective laws and regulations and therefore free for general use. The publisher, the authors and the editors are safe to assume that the advice and information in this book are believed to be true and accurate at the date of publication. Neither the publisher nor the authors or the editors give a warranty, express or implied, with respect to the material contained herein or for any errors or omissions that may have been made. The publisher remains neutral with regard to jurisdictional claims in published maps and institutional affiliations. Printed on acid-free paper This Springer imprint is published by Springer Nature The registered company is Springer International Publishing AG The registered company address is: Gewerbestrasse 11, 6330 Cham, Switzerland Abstract Self-forgiveness is one method by which people process self-condemnation in the aftermath of perceived wrongdoing or failure. When people seek to resolve self- condemnation, they attempt to reconcile conflicting identities—one who accepts personal responsibility for violation of a socio-moral value and experiences conse- quent emotions like guilt and shame, as well as one who seeks self-acceptance through release of distressing emotions directed at the self. For this reason, the chal- lenge of forgiving oneself is to both accept responsibility for a perceived violation and accept oneself as a person of value. In this prologue we outline what to expect in this volume on the psychology of self-forgiveness. We preview the chapters in which expert researchers and clinicians offer their views on self-forgiveness, con- ceptual models that guide research and practice in different areas, and agendas for future research and practice. We identify ten themes to keep in mind when reading this book. Overall, we hope that readers will appreciate the many roles of self- forgiveness in personal well-being and interpersonal relationships. v Preface: What’s So Difficult About Self-Forgiveness? “It’s important to forgive.” “Who do you have the most difficult time forgiving?” “Myself.” -Humans of New York, April 24, 2014. Scientific interest in self-forgiveness arises from the lived experience of people who find that sometimes the hardest person to forgive can be yourself. Throughout life people find themselves in situations where they feel responsible for suffering or unwanted outcomes received by either others or themselves. Parents face regret for hurts suffered by their children, as a result of either their own actions or their failure to prevent harm to their children. Couples develop relationship problems, have affairs, fail to work on their marriage, and divorce or break up. Workers can commit wrongdoing in the workplace and can wrong or hurt fellow workers, leading to reduced productivity and poorer morale. The wars in Afghanistan and Iraq have produced numerous veterans, many who have perpetrated, failed to prevent, or wit- nessed events that violate their deeply held personal beliefs (i.e., moral injury). And of course people commit criminal offences, engaging in violence and other illicit acts, victimizing individuals or entire communities. In short, life is about regrets— doing what we should not do and not doing what we should do. Only the con- scienceless are immune. The experience of having committed a wrong or not done what is right can result in lingering feelings of condemnation and resentment toward the self. Often feel- ings of shame, guilt, remorse, or regret persist even after a period of punishment by others or oneself, or even after receiving forgiveness from others and feeling for- given by whatever one considers to be sacred. In the short term, painful emotions can be functional. Emotions like guilt and shame can help us navigate life, if they are meaningfully interpreted as motivators to reconcile with those affected by our behavior and to facilitate social belonging. However, when self-condemnation is pervasive and chronic, people can experience diminished self-worth. They may vii viii Preface: What’s So Difficult About Self-Forgiveness? punish themselves in an attempt to cope with offence-related experiences. They deny themselves pleasure, isolate themselves from others, and sometimes harm themselves. Unresolved guilt, shame, anger, and disappointment can also lead to cycles of defensive avoidance or externalization of rage that cripples development and functioning of healthy relationships. In contrast to strategies to cope with wrongdoing by either accepting responsibility or prioritizing oneself over others, forgiving oneself entails accepting responsibility for violation of a socio-moral value while also accepting oneself as a person of value. In this way, self-forgiveness enhances our sense of belonging and esteem when perceived wrongdoing or failure threatens these essential psychological needs. Many bright scholars have reflected for years about these issues. What to Expect In its entirety this volume represents a far-reaching and thorough investigation of self-forgiveness from numerous psychological perspectives. It is not without puz- zles, contradictions, and debates—nor should it be. In the pages that follow, we count the raising of issues, unanswered questions, and unsolved mysteries as equally important as providing a seminal foundation for sound empirical investigation and clinical application of self-forgiveness. In this chapter we provide an overview by tracing the development of the psychology of self-forgiveness through the stages of empirical science as described by Rozin (2001). First, we seek to define and describe self-forgiveness as a phenomenon. Necessarily, we must accurately measure it. Measurements have paralleled the vari- ous ways self-forgiveness has been defined and described. We assess the generaliz- ability of self-forgiveness as well as what distinguishes it from alternative ways of responding to wrongdoing. As will become apparent in Part I of this handbook, which we devote to the understanding of self-forgiveness, much work has been done in this regard. The continuing controversy and lingering questions about definitions, measurement, and empirical associations should open readers’ minds to new areas of investigation. Second, after science defines and describes a phenomenon, it aims to understand by what mechanisms and under what conditions a phenomenon manifests. What are the antecedents of self-forgiveness? What effects does it produce? As sophistication of understanding increases, scientists begin to identify what processes are involved (i.e., mediators) and what conditions change (i.e., moderators) the way the phenom- enon unfolds. Innovative and sophisticated work has sought to identify the causes and consequences of self-forgiveness, which are reviewed in Part II of this volume. Due to the complexity of self-forgiveness much more work is needed, and the con- tributions in Part II provide avenues toward further advances in our understanding of self-forgiveness as it relates to personality, physiological, psychological, rela- tional, and religious/spiritual constructs. Preface: What’s So Difficult About Self-Forgiveness? ix Finally, besides having described the phenomenon of self-forgiveness, worked out ways to examine and measure it soundly, and started to understand how it oper- ates in relation to other constructs of interest, scientists also consider scientifically informed interventions in the clinic and in society. Indeed, some clinicians have already begun to apply what we know about self-forgiveness processes based on their clinical experience. Others have begun to integrate their clinical and scientific understandings in broader fields than the counseling room, often using basic or action-oriented research to do so. Both types of approaches—clinically-initiated and research-initiated (in clinical laboratory or community)—can lead to develop- ing evidence-based interventions, which are then disseminated to the mental health community after numerous efficacy and dismantling trials. Scholar-practitioners offer several models of self-forgiveness intervention delivered via modalities such as individual, group, and self-directed treatments in Part III and discuss broader applications to specific clinical contexts and presenting issues in Part IV. Overview of the Book In this preface, we provide an overview of the handbook. We briefly walk you through a part-by-part, and chapter-by-chapter summary of the topics that the schol- ars in this book will review. We applaud the group of international scholars repre- sented within these pages whose content expertise, methodological rigor, and diverse theoretical perspectives comprise the foundation of the empirical literature on the psychology of self-forgiveness. Part I: Understanding Self-Forgiveness In the first part of this book we provide a framework for understanding the need for self-forgiveness. Here there are several questions a reader may want to consider. What psychological processes (emotions, motivations, needs, cognition, etc.) give rise to self-forgiveness? How might self-forgiveness be measured? Is self-forgiveness beneficial and, if so, in what contexts? Are there conditions under which selfforgive- ness might be problematic? These questions form the basis of the first phase of empirical research to define and describe the phenomenon of self-forgiveness. The editors begin by exploring the past and future of the science of self-forgive- ness in the chapter “Orientation to the Psychology of Self-forgiveness.” You should get a historical sense of how the psychology of self-forgiveness has developed from this orienting chapter to provide a contextual background for your reading of the rest of the book. Next, while much has been written on the topics of shame and guilt, we present two contributions that broaden understanding of guilt and shame as they relate to self-forgiveness. In the chapter “Understanding Shame and Guilt,” Leach x Preface: What’s So Difficult About Self-Forgiveness? reviews recent advances in our understanding of shame and guilt. In the chapter “An Evolutionary Approach to Shame-Based Self-Criticism, Self-Forgiveness, and Compassion,” Gilbert and Woodyatt explore the cultural, physiological, and func- tional-evolutionary underpinnings of experiences of shame, guilt, and self-blame. Fundamental psychological needs can become disrupted through feeling that one has committed a transgression or failed to meet an important standard or expecta- tion. In the chapter “Working Through Psychological Needs Following Transgressions to Arrive at Self-Forgiveness,” Woodyatt, Wenzel, and de Vel- Palumbo explore needs of agency and communion that arise when we perceive our- selves to have done wrong, how these then can form barriers to self-forgiveness, and pathways to address these needs. In the chapter “Repairing Meaning, Resolving Rumination, and Moving toward Self-Forgiveness,” Graham, Morse, O’Donnell, and Steger investigate the need for purpose and meaning. They address how cycles of rumination can occur and can be repaired by self-forgiveness in the aftermath of threat to meaning. Part II: The Causes and Consequences of Self-Forgiveness The second part of the handbook is devoted to discussions of how self-forgiveness is associated with personality, physiological, psychological, relational, and reli- gious/spiritual constructs, and under what conditions it is beneficial. In the chapter “The Measurement of Dispositional Self-Forgiveness,” Strelan describes self-for- giveness as a disposition and its association with personality and individual differ- ences. Toussaint, Webb, and Hirsch adapt a stress-and-coping model to investigate the association between self-forgiveness and physical health in the chapter “Self- Forgiveness and Health: A Stress-and-Coping Model.” Massengale, Choe, and Davis, in the chapter “Self-Forgiveness and Personal and Relational Well-Being,” review the association of self-forgiveness and subjective well-being. Given the fre- quency with which people condemn themselves for their actions in the context of close and continual relationships, Pelucchi, Regalia, Paleari, and Fincham examine processes of self-forgiveness within romantic dyads in the chapter “Self-Forgiveness Within Couple Transgressions.” Exline, Wilt, Sauner, Harriott, and Saritoprak high- light when transgressions and failures are perceived as desecration of one’s reli- gious/spiritual values in the chapter “Self-Forgiveness and Religious/Spiritual Struggles.” Finally, in the chapter “The Dark Side of Self-Forgiveness: Forgiving the Self Can Impede Change for Ongoing, Harmful Behavior”, Wohl offers critical insight into contexts where self-forgiveness may not be beneficial, with a discussion of self-forgiveness and the process of behavioral change. Preface: What’s So Difficult About Self-Forgiveness? xi Part III: Applications of Self-forgiveness in Psychopathology and Psychotherapy: Models and Modalities of Intervention As the basic science of self-forgiveness proliferated, it eventually grew to support a still limited but promising applied self-forgiveness science. Thus, in the third part of this book, innovative clinical scholars discuss different models and modalities of self-forgiveness intervention. Cornish and Wade take an individual therapy approach in chapter “Self-Forgiveness in Individual Psychotherapy: Therapeutic Models and Counseling Outcomes.” Worthington, Griffin, and Wade outline approaches to group-based interventions to promote self-forgiveness in the chapter “Group Intervention to Promote Self-Forgiveness.” Glenn, Moon, Paine, Wolff, and Sandage discuss self-forgiveness intervention within couple and family therapy in the chap- ter “Self-Forgiveness in Couple and Family Therapy.” And, in the chapter “Self- Directed Intervention to Promote Self-Forgiveness,” Griffin, Worthington, Davis, and Bell explore self-directed interventions designed to promote self-forgiveness as an alternative to traditional modalities of treatment. Part IV: Applications of Self-Forgiveness in Psychopathology and Psychotherapy: Clinical Applications to Specific Domains In Part IV of this volume, authors with diverse areas of expertise in a range of clini- cal presentations discuss the application of self-forgiveness to a range of clinical and subclinical psychopathologies. In the chapter “Self-Forgiveness and Military Service: Equipping Warriors to Combat Moral Injury,” Griffin, Worthington, Danish, Donovan, Lavelock, Shaler, Dees, Maguen, and Davis discuss the clinical applica- tion of self-forgiveness in military health, especially for service members exposed to morally salient traumatic stressors. DiBlasio explores why people with personal- ity disorders may experience barriers to self-forgiveness and pathways to self-for- giveness through understanding theorized neurobiological components of their diagnosis in the chapter “Self-Forgiveness and Treating Personality Disorders.” Hirsch, Webb, and Toussaint investigate self-forgiveness and condemnation in the context of self-harm and suicidal behaviors in the chapter “Self-Forgiveness, Self- Harm, and Suicidal Behavior: Understanding the Role of Forgiving the Self in the Act of Hurting One’s Self.” In the chapter “Self-Forgiveness, Addiction, and Recovery,” Webb, Hirsch, and Toussaint examine self-forgiveness in the context of substance addiction and recovery, and Mosher, Hook, and Grubbs explore self-for- giveness in the context of behavioral addiction to sex (i.e., hypersexual behavior) in the chapter “Self-Forgiveness and Hypersexual Behavior.” Next, in the chapter “Self-Forgiveness at Work: Finding Pathways to Renewal When Coping with Failure or Perceived Transgressions,” Woodyatt and Cornish discuss industrial/ organizational application of self-forgiveness in the workplace, especially as it relates to burnout. Within the context of religious/spiritual communities, Webb,

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