Freedom from Addiction: The Secret Behind Successful Addiction Busting (Human Givens Approach)

235 Pages·2009·2.37 MB·English

by  Joe Griffin

Freedom from
addiction
The secret behind successful
addiction busting
Joe Griffin & Ivan Tyrrell
with Denise Winn
ALSO BY THE AUTHORS
Human Givens: A new approach to
emotional health and clear thinking
Joe Griffin and Ivan Tyrrell
Dreaming Reality: How dreaming
keeps us sane or can drive us mad
Joe Griffin and Ivan Tyrrell
How to lift depression - fast
Joe Griffin and Ivan Tyrrell
The Origin of Dreams
Joe Griffin
The Survival Option
Ivan Tyrrell
Freedom from
addiction
The secret behind successful
addiction busting
A practical handbook
PUBLISHING
Joe Griffin 8c Ivan Tyrrell
with Denise Winn
PU B LI SH I NG
First published in Great Britain 2005
Copyright © Joe Griffin, Ivan Tyrrell and Denise Winn 2005
The right of Joe Griffin, Ivan Tyrrell and Denise Winn to be identified as the
authors of this work has been asserted in accordance with sections 77 and 78
of the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.
Published by HG Publishing, an imprint of Human Givens Publishing Ltd,
Chalvington, East Sussex, BN27 3TD, United Kingdom.
www.humangivens.com
A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.
ISBN 1 899398 46 5
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a
retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means electronic,
mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the prior
written permission of the publishers.
Typeset in Book Antiqua and Conduit Condensed.
Printed and bound in Great Britain by The Bath Press.
Index by Indexing Specialists (UK) Ltd.
"The greatest wealth is a
poverty of desires. "
SENECA
CONTENTS
Acknowledgements xiii
INTRODUCTION:
There's nothing as certain as change xv
PART 1:
UNDERSTANDING ADDICTION 1
But do I actually have an addiction? 4
1. Do you spend a lot oftime on your problem activity? 5
Thinking about your problem activity 7
Warning! 7
2. Do you often overdo it, without realising or intending to? 10
"I can hold my drink" 12
3. Do you need to engage in the activity more and more, to
get any satisfaction? 13
4. Do you get withdrawal symptoms if you restrain yourself? 15
5. Have you stopped your initial activity but substituted
another addictive behaviour for it? 17
6. Have you made at least a few attempts to quit? 19
7. Does engaging in the activity badly affect other areas
of your life? 20
Addiction is widespread for a good reason 23
Why addiction is a hijacker 26
The carrot ... 28
... and the stick 30
The 'couch potato' 31
Why being addicted is just chasing 'fool's gold' 32
I
VIII FREEDDM FROM ADDICTION
The natural 'high' 34
All addiction results from needs not being met 36
"Smoking isn't any different" 37
You've got to get a life! 39
How do we know that 'having a life' eliminates addiction? 40
Myths about addiction 43
Myth 1 - Addiction is a biological disease 43
Addiction and genes 44
Myth 2 - Withdrawal is agony 48
Withdrawal symptoms have to be mild 51
Myth 3 - I'll never manage to stop because I've failed
every time before 52
The wheel of change 53
Myth 4 - If I decide to stop, then I'll just stop 56
Myth 5 - You need bags of will power 57
What happens in the brain when you have a craving 59
The boss and the boss's secretary 59
The strange cup of coffee 62
The process of withdrawal 63
Receiving the wrong message 65
The power of expectation 67
Emotions arise from expectations 68
Why, when we are addicted, does the 'something
wonderful' never happen? 70
Cheating, dopamine-soaked memories 73
Memory distortion 74
More of the lies addiction tells us 75
Jam tomorrow 82
Logic never cured addiction - but your emotions can 82
Exchanging the files 83
CONTENTS IX
An Irish wedding 85
This is the testing moment 88
PART 2:
OVERCOMING ADDICTION 91
The human givens 92
The three essential steps to beating addiction 93
Ouestions to ask yourself 96
What does addiction do for me? 96
Do I have any concerns about my addiction? 97
What concerns might other people have about
my addictive activity? 99
What are my hopes for the future? 100
Might my addictive activity get in the way? 101
How would I like things to be different? 102
Avoid giving addiction a chance 102
Never argue with addiction 103
The chest X-ray that tipped the balance 104
Do an emotional 'needs audit' on yourself 106
Do you feel safe? 107
Do you have people in your life who are important to you
and to whom you are important? 109
Do you have wider connections? 109
Are you comfortable with your status in society? 110
Do you have a sense of competence and achievement? 110
Do you have a sense of autonomy and control? 111
How healthily are your attention needs being met? 111
Do you have a sense of meaning and purpose in your life? 112
How well are your emotional needs being met? (exercise) 113
Self-esteem 114
I
x
FREEDOM FROM ADDICTION
Put back some perspective 115
Caroline's story 116
Set your goals 117
Goal1-Stopping or cutting down? 119
Cutting down 119
Stopping altogether 122
Goal 2 - Revamp your lifestyle 123
Make social contact 123
Start small 125
Techniques to help you reach your goals 127
Learn how to relax yourself 127
Three ways to relax quickly 129
Create a 'special, peaceful place' in your mind 133
Change your expectations 134
Cuppa scupper 135
Smoking is a fag 137
Drink think 138
Remind yourself of your resources 139
Make a list 141
Separate yourself from the addiction 141
Recognise unhelpful pattern matches 143
Breaking the connection 145
Other triggers 146
Buy yourself time 147
Traumatic memories 148
Visualise success! 148
How to harness the power of expectation 149
Visualise the negatives of addiction 150