Domestic Violence and Control

176 Pages·1988·2.521 MB·English

by  Jan E. Stets Ph.D. (auth.)

Domestic Violence and Control
Jan E. Stets, PH.D.
Domestic Violence
and Control
Springer-Verlag
New York Berlin Heidelberg
London Paris Tokyo
Jan E. Stets, Ph.D.
Family Research Laboratory
Horton Social Science Center
University of New Hampshire
Durham, New Hampshire 03824, USA
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Stets, Jan E.
Domestic violence and control.
Bibliography: p.
Includes index.
1. Conjugal violence-United States-Psychological
aspects. 2. Wife abuse-United States-Prevention.
1. Title.
HQ809.3.U5S83 1988 362.8'2 87-23555
© 1988 by Springer-Verlag New York Inc.
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Typeset by Asco Trade Typesetting Limited, Hong Kong.
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ISBN-13: 978-0-387-96628-1 e-ISBN-13: 978-1-4613-8760-2
DOl: 10.1007/978-1-4613-8760-2
Preface
This research began several years ago when an acquaintance, a staff mem
ber at a midwestern women's shelter, learned of my interest in domestic
violence and approached me about conducting an evaluation of a male
batterers program that the shelter was going to implement. Over time,
problems in recruiting enough participants, delays in starting the program,
and other difficulties arose over the logistics of carrying out that program
evaluation. Consequently, I abandoned that research agenda, but with the
contacts I made, I refocused my efforts toward obtaining an understanding
of the dynamics of violence on an interactive level. It was my belief that
researchers in domestic violence had not fully captured the interpersonal
processes occurring within domestic violence episodes. Over the following
several months, I spent many hours talking to perpetrators and victims of
violence with the thought that they could aid me in identifying processes
indicative of violent interactions. From those lengthy discussions, this book
has emerged.
Having had the opportunity to talk, on an intimate level, with men and
women involved in domestic violence, I have corne to better understand
the violence I witnessed and experienced while growing up. It is my hope
that those who have ever lived through such violence will find some ques
tions answered in this book. Those who have never lived through such
violence may find that the processes that occur within violent episodes are
not very different from other interactions, differing only in that one partner
responds violently.
This book examines the features and processes that underlie domestic
violence incidents between intimates. It is based on approximately 80
hours of in-depth interviews over three months with nine couples involved
in violent relationships. As the pages that follow will show, the issue of
control emerges as a central theme organizing respondents' thoughts and
feelings on the batterer and the violence over time. This book uses the
respondents' own talk to illustrate the different patterns of control.
Early in Chapter 1, I provide the reader with a general understanding
of what we know about domestic violence. I then indicate how this study
vi Preface
contributes to our understanding of abuse. Three unique features charac
terize this research, including incorporating both the men's and women's
perspectives, examining the violence over time, and employing the inter
actionist perspective.
In Chapter 2, I discuss how the present study was carried out. I describe
how the respondents were obtained and how the interviews were con
ducted, transcribed, coded, and analyzed. Chapter 3 introduces the re
spondents in this study. Each respondent's background is described, and
the history and nature of their current violent relationship are presented.
In Chapter 4, I discuss the first pattern of control in domestic violence
relationships. I reveal that respondents made sense of the violence they
used or experienced by describing the batterer's emotions and behavior as
in or out of control. The batterer's emotions are viewed as "out of control"
(thus, impulsive), and their behavior is viewed as both "in control" (in
strumental) and "out of control" (impulsive).
A social psychological model is used to explain violence in terms of con
trol in Chapter 5. I examine the complex and processual nature of the
violent act in interaction and address the different aspects of the self-that
is, the "I" and "Me" that intrude into the violent act to produce it, control
it, or both. The model resolves competing explanations in the domestic
violence literature (that violence is controlled and instrumental versus
violence is uncontrolled and impulsive) by showing the conditions under
which each is true. Chapter 6 provides detailed evidence from the data on
how the model operates.
This issue of control is also relevant to respondents when describing the
violence over time. This second pattern of control is discussed in Chapter 7.
As I show, repeated acts of violence are understood in terms of the bat
terer wanting to control the woman's behavior. Becoming nonviolent
over time is accompanied by the batterer avoiding attempted control over
his partner and controlling his emotions and behavior. Chapter 8 discusses
the general implications of this research and future concerns for interac
tionists.
There are many people who helped make this book possible. I am espe
cially indebted to the men and women who participated in this research.
Their trust in me and openness to share their feelings and experiences per
mitted me to get into their lives and understand domestic violence from
their perspective. I am also grateful to the officials at a midwestern shelter
for abused women and to male battering counselors who gave me the
opportunity to cunduct this research. Their cooperation enabled me to
carry out this research.
Special thanks are also extended to Bill Corsaro, Maureen Pirog-Good,
Donna Eder, and Diane Felmlee who helped me obtain a richer under
standing of domestic violence. A very special thanks is extended to Peter
Burke who listened to my ideas throughout this research. His support
Preface vii
helped me get through some difficult moments. Finally, I thank those
friends who were there when I needed them.
This research was supported by Grant # 86-IJ-CX-67 from the National
Institute of Justice, V.S. Department of Justice. Points of view or opinions
stated in this book are those of the author and do not necessarily repre
sent the official position or policies of the V.S. Department of Justice.
Jan E. Stets
Contents
Preface.......................................................... v
Chapter 1 Understanding Domestic Violence. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1
A Brief Historical Look .................................... 2
Domestic Violence in Review ............................... 3
The Focus of This Study. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 6
Summary....... ... ..... .............. ........... ..... ...... 13
Chapter 2 The Research Study.................................. 14
Recruitment ................................................ 14
Protection and Consent of Respondents. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 15
Interview Procedure........................................ 16
Transcription and Coding Procedure . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17
Analysis .................................................... 18
This Research and the Male Batterers Program. . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19
Chapter 3 Participants.................... . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 21
Demography of Respondents . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 21
Participants .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 22
Couple 1: Ronald and Kathy. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 22
Couple 2: Henry and Jackie.............................. 26
Couple 3: Fred and Ann ................................. 30
Couple 4: Mike and Kay. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 33
Couple 5: Larry and Terri................................ 37
Couple 6: Doug and Wendy.............................. 40
Couple 7: Kevin and Lisa ..................... ,.......... 44
Couple 8: Bill and Jane .................................. 48
Couple 9: Frank and Nancy. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 50
x Contents
Chapter 4 Emotions as Out of Control and Behavior as In and
Out of Control . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 54
Emotions as Out of Control ................................. 55
The Men's Emotions. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 55
The Women's Emotions.................................. 56
Discussion on Emotions. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 57
Behavior as In and Out of Control .......................... 61
The Men's Behavior..................................... 61
The Women's Behavior ........... , ........ , ...... " . .. . . . 65
Discussion on Behavior ..................................... 65
Summary ............. '" ..... .... ..... .... .... .... ..... .... 67
Chapter 5 Explaining Violence in Terms of Control. . . . . . . . . . . . . . 69
An Interactionist Perspective ............................... 69
Perception ............................................... 73
Manipulation............................................. 74
Consummation .......................................... 75
Emotions as Out of Control and Behavior as In and
Out of Control .......................................... 76
Summary.... .............. ... ..... ..... ... .... .... ...... ... 76
Chapter 6 Control as Object: Evidence for the Symbolic
Interactionist Model ................................. 78
Clarifying the Model ....................................... 78
Shortcomings to the Data ................................... 79
Identifying the Subset of Data .............................. 80
Evidence of the Symbolic Interactionist Model from the
Findings .................................................... 83
The Relationship Between the Expectations of the "Me" to
be Nonviolent and Inhibiting the Impulse to be Violent. . . . 83
The Relationship Between the Expectations of the "Me" to
be Violent and Inhibiting the Impulse to be Violent ....... 85
The Relationship Between the Expectations of the "Me" to
be Violent and Checking the Impulse to be Violent ........ 87
The Relationship Between the Expectations of the "Me" to
be Nonviolent and Checking the Impulse to be Violent .... 88
The Relationship Between the Expectations of the "Me" to
be Violent and Carrying out the Impulse to be Violent. . . . . 90
The Relationship Between the Expectations of the "Me" to
be Nonviolent and Carrying out the Impulse to be Violent. 92
The Interactive Component of the Model ................. 92
A Discussion of the Contextual Cues ..................... 95
Summary...... ... .... ..... ......... ........ .... ..... .... ... 98
Contents xi
Chapter 7 Control as Object: An Analysis of Violence
Over Time. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 101
Phase One: The Emergence of Violence in Terms of
Instrumentality ............................................ 103
Stage One: Challenging the Right to Control ............. 105
Stage Two: Losing Control and Using Violence to
Regain Control. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 106
Stage Three: Regaining Control Through the Other's
Submission. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 107
Instrumental Violence: A Way of Doing Power ........... 109
Phase Two: Instrumental Violence to Nonviolence Through
Control . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 111
Controlling Emotions. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 112
Controlling Violent Behavior ............................. 113
Avoiding Controlling the Woman......................... 116
Control, Violence, and Change Over Time... . .. ... ..... .. 116
Summary ................................................... 120
Chapter 8 Conclusions ......................................... 121
Summary of Research Findings. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 121
The Men's and Women's Perspectives ....................... 124
Implications of Research Regarding Control and Violence ... 127
Future Concerns for Symbolic Interactionists . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 132
Summary ................................................... 133
Appendix 1 Data on Couples Over Time (1985) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 135
Appendix 2A Letter to Male Participants . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 136
Appendix 2B Informed Consent Form to Male Participants ...... 137
Appendix 3A Letter to Female Participants ..................... 138
Appendix 3B Informed Consent Form to Female Participants . . . . 139
Appendix 4 Interview Approach .............................. 140
Appendix 5 Interview Guide .................................. 145
Appendix 6 Interview Guide Over Time. . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . .. . . . 147
Appendix 7 Coding Procedure ............................... . 148
Appendix 8A Demographic Characteristics of Respondents ..... . 150
Appendix 8B Demographic Characteristics of Respondents
continued ....................................... . 152
Appendix 9 Treatment Methods for Respondents Over Time
(1985) ........................................... . 154
xii Contents
Appendix 10 The Absence of Control 155
Appendix 11 Applying the Model to Violence Toward Men ..... 157
References ...................................................... 159
Author Index . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 163
Subject Index. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 165