Do Not Commit Adultery

13 Pages·2014·0.7 MB·English

SESSION 8
Do Not Commit Adultery
God Displays His Glory Through People of Purity
Summary and Goal
In the Seventh Commandment, God forbids adultery and thereby emphasizes the goodness of sex
within the marriage covenant. Sexual immorality distorts the picture of the gospel and becomes an
idol that controls our behavior. Jesus showed how the sin of adultery begins with lust in the human
heart. Through the gospel, we are forgiven of our disobedience, and we are set free to live in purity so
that others might see the goodness and glory of God.
Steps to Prepare
1. Read the main passages for this lesson, recording your insights and questions:
- Deuteronomy 5:18
- Proverbs 6:20-29
- Matthew 5:27-30
2. Study the Expanded Lesson Content (pp. 94-101).
- Determine what elements of this lesson are most applicable to your particular group.
- Consider ways to personalize the lesson content for you and your class.
3. Review the Teaching Plan (pp. 92-93).
- Refine the lesson plan based on your group’s particular needs.
- Adjust the plan if necessary.
4. Pray for the Lord’s guidance as you lead your group through this material.

Lesson Outline
1. Why does God forbid adultery? (Deut. 5:18)
2. What are the consequences of breaking this Commandment? (Prov. 6:20-29)
3. What is the solution to a lustful heart? (Matt. 5:27-30)
Session 8 91
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Teaching Plan
Do Not Commit
Adultery
Session 8
Introduce the Lesson
For Further Begin by showing or describing the Pepsi commercial with the Coke driver
Discussion using a Pepsi product (leader p. 94; personal study p. 74).
In what ways can those
of us who are single bring In society, fidelity is often an unspoken expectation.
honor and glory to God Perhaps it’s being faithful to a team, a company, a brand,
in a way that displays the
a product, a political party, or a social cause. What does
beauty of the gospel?
betrayal look like in these cases? Does pledging fidelity by
an oath or contract change the situation?
For Further Transition to the subject matter of this lesson by pointing out how Scripture
Discussion requires fidelity to God (the First Commandment) and to our spouse (the
Seventh Commandment) (leader pp. 94-95; personal study pp. 74-75).
Read 2 Samuel 11 and
list the mistakes that
David made before, 1. W hy does God forbid adultery?
during, and after his
descent into adultery. Read Deuteronomy 5:18, and open up for discussion the reasons why God forbids
adultery. Highlight the reasons below (leader pp. 95-97; personal study pp. 75-76:)
• Because it goes against God’s original design
For Further
What are some passages in the Bible that extol the
Discussion
beauty and glory of sex within marriage? What does the
Reflect on the saying “Sex prohibition against adultery tell us about God’s view of sex
sells.” Why is sex appeal and marriage?
so powerful?
• Because it destroys marriages and families
Have you or someone you know walked through the pain
caused by adultery? What were the consequences of this
sin? Why do you think immorality is treated so seriously in
the Scriptures?
• Because it damages a picture of the gospel
• Because it is an expression of spiritual adultery
What are some activities the Scriptures would consider
spiritually adulterous toward God?
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2. What are the consequences of breaking
this Commandment? For Further
Read Proverbs 6:20-29, encouraging your group to notice the contrast between Discussion
“life” (wise obedience) and “death” (burned by disobedience). Trace the progression
What are some various
of sin—flattery, lust, infatuation (leader p. 98; personal study pp. 76-77.) activities that would fall
under the prohibition
against adultery in the
What are some elements of temptation that can lead a Seventh Commandment?
person into sexual immorality? In what ways can Christians
guard against potentially compromising situations?
Highlight the description of one who commits adultery in Proverbs 7, especially For Further
Discussion
how the story ends (vv. 22-23). Drive home the serious consequences of
adultery—idolatry that leads to destruction. Mention that sex outside of marriage What are some examples
cheapens God’s gift of sexuality (leader pp. 98-99; personal study pp. 77-78.) of movies or television
shows that romanticize or
glamorize adultery? What
In what ways can sexual sin become an idol? What are some should be our response to
ways you see a cheapening of sexuality in society today? their message?
3. What is the solution to a lustful heart?
Transition to this point by asking the group what we should do in light
of God’s design for sexuality. Introduce Matthew 5:27-30, and encourage
your group to note how Jesus traces adulterous behavior back to the heart
(leader pp. 99-100; personal study p. 78).
Emphasize the need for a gospel-transformed heart as the only solution
to lust and adultery. Then discuss specific ways we can avoid temptation,
pornography, lust, etc. (leader p. 100; personal study pp. 78-79).
How does pornography distort sexual desire? What are
some practical ways we can hold each other accountable
as we seek to live holy, pure lives that glorify God?
Tell the story of Jesus and the woman caught in adultery to drive home the
point that our sexual sins can be forgiven (leader p. 101; personal study p. 79).
How can we demonstrate the attitude of Christ toward
those who have fallen into adultery? How does the gospel
give us hope as we deal with sexual sin?
Conclusion
Connect these truths to our mission as Christ’s followers. The stronger our
marriages, the stronger our gospel witness (leader p. 101; personal study p. 79).
What is the connection between our purity as God’s people
and our proclamation of the gospel? What are some
practical ways we can elevate the institution of marriage in
our churches?
Session 8 93
Expanded Lesson Content
Do Not Commit
Adultery
Session 8
Opening Illustration
and Introduction
Not long ago, a commercial
came out for Pepsi Max® that
depicted two truck drivers
eating at the same diner. One
represented Pepsi Max and
the other Coca Cola Zero®.
The Pepsi guy strikes up a
conversation with the Coke
guy while the song “Why Can’t
We Be Friends?” plays from the
jukebox. Next, the Pepsi driver offers a Pepsi Max to his newfound friend
Voices from (who happens to be wearing a Coca Cola hat and uniform). Thinking this is
Church History a sign of true friendship, the Coke driver takes a large swig of the soda. But
the Pepsi driver gets his smartphone out, records the other driver, posts the
“We should fear and love
God, and so we should video to YouTube, and then tells the guy what he’s just done. The commercial
lead a chaste and pure life
ends with the two of them launching out of the diner window in a brawl.
in word and deed, each
one loving and honoring his The reason the Pepsi Max commercial is effective is because we see the
wife or her husband.” 1
Coca Cola driver “cheating” on his company. In reality, of course, he was
–Martin Luther (1483-1546)
just drinking another soda. He was not married to the product; he just
worked for the company. Even though he wouldn’t be legally prohibited
from drinking Pepsi, there was irony in his actions. What makes the spot
Voices from effective is that we expect fidelity from the truck driver, even without an
the Church oath or commitment.
“If God had the gospel of
Jesus’s salvation in mind In society, fidelity is often an unspoken expectation.
when he established Perhaps it’s being faithful to a team, a company, a brand,
marriage, then marriage
a product, a political party, or a social cause. What does
only ‘works’ to the degree
that approximates the betrayal look like in these cases? Does pledging fidelity by
pattern of God’s self-giving an oath or contract change the situation?
love in Christ.” 2
–Timothy and Kathy Keller
Scripture has much to say about fidelity, oaths, and commitment.
But Scripture’s focus is on more important things than brand loyalty for
certain teams or companies or products.
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First and foremost, God desires for us to be faithful to Him, to put
no other gods before Him and live in purity. This faithfulness is expressed Further
in our actions, such as our faithful, lifelong commitment to our husband Commentary
or wife. God intended marriage to be for life. Because marriage is the
“If murder is a violation
physical and spiritual union of a man and woman, dire consequences of life itself, adultery is
a violation of its most
come from breaking this commitment.
important and sacred
human relationship, that
of marriage. The seventh
Lesson Summary
commandment deals
In this session, we will look at the Seventh Commandment, in which with this matter rather
specifically in that it
God forbids adultery and thereby emphasizes the goodness of sex within
addresses adultery and
the marriage covenant. Sexual immorality distorts the picture of the gospel not sexual impropriety
in general as the precise
and becomes an idol that controls our behavior. Jesus showed how the sin
verb na’ap makes clear.
of adultery begins with lust in the human heart. Through the gospel, we Elsewhere such matters
as fornication (Num. 25:1),
are forgiven of our disobedience, and we are set free to live in purity so
prostitution (Deut. 22:21),
that others might see the goodness and glory of God. and homosexuality
(Judg. 19:22; Lev. 18:22;
Deut. 23:17-18) receive
1. Why does God forbid adultery? (Deut. 5:18)
attention and are
soundly condemned.
Following the Commandment forbidding murder is the one
Adultery, however, implies
forbidding adultery. Take a look at the stark, black-and-white way the unfaithfulness, covenant
breaking, and so is an apt
Commandment comes to us:
analogue to covenant
infidelity on a higher
18 “ ‘And you shall not commit adultery. plane—the divine-human.
Later revelation speaks of
‘going whoring’ after other
Reasons in Scripture That God Forbids Adultery gods, that is, abandoning
the redeeming sovereign
in favor of another who
Because it goes against God’s original design. The prohibition against has no covenant claim or
legitimacy (cf. Hos. 4:1-19;
adultery doesn’t make sense until we understand God’s original design for
Jer. 3:9-13).” 3
sexual expression within the confines of marriage. From the beginning,
–Eugene H. Merrill
God established a blueprint for the family. He saw that it was not good for
man to be alone, and He created woman. Adam and Eve together reflected
the image of God in their relationship of trust and love.
In Genesis 2:24-25, we read: “Therefore a man shall leave his father
and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.” God’s
design was for one man to be united with one woman as one flesh. Man
would leave his father and mother in order to form a new family. In the
innocence and purity of the garden of Eden, they would live together
naked and not feel any shame.
What are some passages in the Bible that extol the
beauty and glory of sex within marriage? What does the
prohibition against adultery tell us about God’s view of sex
and marriage?
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Because it destroys marriages and families. The glorious picture of marital
Voices from bliss in the garden was shattered by human sin. When the first couple sinned
Church History against God, they became separated from God. The marriage covenant is still
powerful, but because of sin, it is a fractured version of what God originally
“We are temples of the
Holy Spirit, body and soul, intended. Trust is broken. Marriages are imperfect. Many fall apart.
and God wants both to be
Throughout Old Testament history, we see how marriage was
kept clean and holy. That is
why He forbids everything damaged as a result of sin in the world. Men mistreated women by
which incites unchastity,
betraying them or taking multiple wives. Adultery became commonplace.
whether it be actions,
looks, talk, thoughts, A well-known story of adultery in the Old Testament is King David
or desires.”
and Bathsheba in 2 Samuel 11. Here we see a strong king who followed
–The Heidelberg Catechism
after God’s heart but fell to the sin of adultery. David, the giant-killer and
mighty warrior, saw from the rooftop of his palace a beautiful woman
bathing. What the king wanted, the king got. Disregarding the fact she
was married to Uriah—a soldier on the front lines of his army fighting for
Israel—David slept with her.
After Bathsheba informed him she was pregnant, David sent for
Uriah, thinking he could cover up his sin by having Uriah spend the
night with his wife. But Uriah was a faithful servant who extolled the
virtues of his king and his soldiers. Even David’s plot to use alcohol to dull
Uriah’s senses didn’t work. Uriah didn’t sleep with his wife, and the secret
pregnancy would soon be known. The lust that led David to adultery
next led him to lie and then led him to kill. In a remarkable display of
depravity, David sent Uriah to the front lines and ordered the military
commander to pull back during the fighting so Uriah would die.
David did not get away with this act of cruelty. God’s law was clear,
and God’s law was intended to guide His people to a life filled with joy.
David’s sin reaped severe consequences for his family and his country.
Have you or someone you know walked through the pain
caused by adultery? What were the consequences of this
sin? Why do you think immorality is treated so seriously in
the Scriptures?
Because it damages a picture of the gospel. You may wonder what
God’s law about adultery has to do with the gospel. In Galatians 3:24,
Paul wrote that “the law was our guardian until Christ came, in order
that we might be justified by faith.” If we apply this verse about the
law in general to the specific law against adultery, we see that this
Commandment (like a guardian) was meant to protect marriage. It
protects the design of what God established from the beginning.
The law also protected marriage as a picture of the gospel. The apostle
Paul wrote that husbands are to love their wives as Christ loved the church
(Eph. 5:25). Marriage is connected to Christ in that it paints a picture of
our relationship with God.
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In Matthew 19:5-6, Jesus reaffirmed the Old Testament’s vision of a
man leaving his family to become one flesh with his wife. This passage Voices from
demonstrates the fact that Christ came to fulfill the law, not abolish it. It the Church
also demonstrates the importance of fidelity in marriage. Jesus went so far
“As believers, through
as to say, “What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” Christ we have been made
worthy to be a place that
God is the One who joins man and woman together. Marriage is
God is pleased to dwell.
more than a document that deals with assets, rights, and obligations. It is In light of this, we must
be driven to live a life
the physical, lasting union of a man and woman for life. Adultery is the
reflecting who is inside
tearing apart of the “one flesh” God has established. That’s why it damages of us.” 4
people emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually. –Eric Mason
Because it is an expression of spiritual adultery. Physical adultery
may be against a spouse, but there is always a spiritual component that
Further
is against God. That’s why David, who sinned against Bathsheba and
Commentary
her husband, when confessing his sin, cried out to God for forgiveness:
“There is a kind of praying
“Against you, you only, have I sinned” (Ps. 51:4). Physical adultery is an
that is wrong because
expression of spiritual adultery. it makes a cuckold out
of God. We use our
In Scripture, God often describes His relationship with His people in
Husband’s generosity to
terms of a marriage covenant. The expectation is love and fidelity. God is hire prostitutes for private
pleasures. These are
faithful and constantly pursuing His people, but His people “cheat” on
startling words. James calls
Him by running after idols. us ‘adulterous people’ if we
pray like this. He pictures
Through the prophets Hosea and Ezekiel, God described His
the church as the wife
relationship with the nation of Israel in graphic terms. God said that of God. God has made
us for Himself and has
He covered the nakedness of Israel and entered into a covenant with
given Himself to us for our
“her,” giving the nation a female description in order to compare His enjoyment. Therefore, it is
adultery when we try to be
relationship with Israel to that of a groom and bride. He bestowed
‘friends’ with the world. If
wealth and gifts on His beloved, but the nation chose to worship idols. we seek from the world the
pleasures we should seek
Ezekiel 16:15 says: “But you trusted in your beauty and played the whore
in God, we are unfaithful
because of your renown and lavished your whorings on any passerby; to our marriage vows. And,
what’s worse, when we go
your beauty became his.”
to our heavenly Husband
The seriousness with which God takes our sin is a sign that God and actually pray for the
resources with which to
desires to receive glory and love from us. He desires to have a relationship
commit adultery with the
with His people, and this relationship must be exclusive. world, it is a very wicked
thing. It is as though we
As believers, our relationship with Christ is now described in terms of
would ask our husband
a bride and groom. In James 4:4, we read that friendship with the world is for money to hire male
prostitutes to provide the
hostility toward God. Those who give themselves over to worldly patterns
pleasure we don’t find
of thought and behavior are “adulteresses”—serious language from a God in him!” 5
serious about loving His people! –John Piper
What are some activities the Scriptures would consider
spiritually adulterous toward God?
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2. What are the consequences of breaking this
Further Commandment? (Prov. 6:20-29)
Commentary We’ve seen that God forbids adultery because it unravels a bond
“Instruction that has been that should never be broken. Now let’s look at the consequences that
internalized sustains the come from disregarding the Seventh Commandment. Proverbs 6 gives
person who faces moral
challenges (Ps. 119:11). While instruction and warning against adultery:
verse 21 refers to ‘them,’
verse 22 literally says ‘she
20 My son, keep your father’s commandment,
will guide you,’ perhaps
referring to the command and forsake not your mother’s teaching.
or the teaching in verse 20
21 Bind them on your heart always;
or to Lady Wisdom, a
common personification tie them around your neck.
of wisdom. The word for
22 When you walk, they will lead you;
‘guide’ is the same as
‘leads’ in Ps. 23:3. Walking, when you lie down, they will watch over you;
lying down, and waking
and when you awake, they will talk with you.
up covers all aspects of
daily life.” 23 For the commandment is a lamp and the teaching a light,
“[Verse 26] is not to excuse and the reproofs of discipline are the way of life,
prostitution (1 Cor. 6:15-20)
24 to preserve you from the evil woman,
but to illustrate the terrible
penalty of adultery by from the smooth tongue of the adulteress.
way of comparison; the
25 Do not desire her beauty in your heart,
adulteress will destroy
someone’s life.” and do not let her capture you with her eyelashes;
“[Verses 27-29] illustrate 26 for the price of a prostitute is only a loaf of bread,
the inevitability of
but a married woman hunts down a precious life.
punishment. To ‘go
unpunished’ is a legal term 27 Can a man carry fire next to his chest
meaning to be acquitted,
and his clothes not be burned?
declared innocent,
pardoned, or released; 28 Or can one walk on hot coals
to be set free from guilt,
and his feet not be scorched?
liability, or punishment
(Ex. 21:19; Num. 5:31). The 29 So is he who goes in to his neighbor’s wife;
basic meaning of the word
none who touches her will go unpunished.
is to be pure, clean, or
free. To say that someone
will not go unpunished
This passage begins with the author telling the reader that his wisdom
is more emphatic than
simply saying he will will bring life and discipline. It is written from the perspective of a father
be punished.” 6
giving advice to his son. He wants him to stay away from the woman
–David K. Stabnow,
who has a flattering tongue. He warns his son not to lust after her or be
HCSB Study Bible
captivated by her eyelashes. Notice the progression: flattery leads to lust
and then infatuation.
What are some elements of temptation that can lead a
person into sexual immorality? In what ways can Christians
guard against potentially compromising situations?
The following chapter in Proverbs reiterates these warnings in the
form of a story. A young man wanders past the house of a seductress.
Lacking sense, he goes inside. With smooth words she convinces him
that her husband is away and will not be back for some time.
98 Leader Guide | Summer 2014
(Sounds like someone today saying, “No one needs to know!”) The dire
result is communicated in Proverbs 7:22-23: “All at once he follows her, as Voices from
an ox goes to the slaughter, or as a stag is caught fast till an arrow pierces Church History
its liver; as a bird rushes into a snare; he does not know that it will cost
“The sin of immorality is
him his life.” not one we are instructed
to fight. It is one we have
This language may seem harsh, but that’s how serious the sin is. The
been told to flee. Run
point of these warnings is that our actions have severe consequences. from that compromising
situation. Saturate that
Violating the law of God will not go unpunished. We will face earthly
place with your absence.” 7
consequences for our sin, and unless we repent, we will face eternal
–Adrian Rogers (1931-2005)
condemnation too.
Do you see the contrast between life and death in Proverbs 6? The
command to discipline oneself to stay away from adultery is “the way
of life” (6:23). Obedience lends protection from evil and resistance to Voices from
the Church
flattery (6:24). The adulteress goes after “a precious life” (6:26). Then
note the imagery at the end: fire, burnt clothes, and scorched feet—vivid “When you allow your
eyes to feast on the
illustrations of the punishment promised in verse 29.
forbidden, the result will be
The consequences of adultery, just like the consequences of all sin, are great folly.” 8
spiritual and physical death. If left unchecked, sexual desire can become –Johnny Hunt
an idol that consumes our hearts. That’s why we must guard our heart
from anything that would hinder our relationship with God. Choosing to
disobey God is choosing death over life.
Voices from
Another consequence of adultery is that it cheapens the beautiful
Church History
gift of sex that God has given us. The Bible doesn’t just give us warnings
“There are as many
against sex outside of marriage; it also commends sex inside of marriage.
snares as there are sins;
For example, Song of Solomon is a love poem between a husband and wife as many hunters as there
are snares.” 9
who have a strong physical and emotional desire for one another. They
–Jerome (347-420)
describe their physical attraction in vivid language. Take the beautiful
descriptions of marital love in Song of Solomon and compare them to the
warnings against adultery in Proverbs 6–7. Immediately you can see how
sex outside of God’s plan cheapens the gift.
In what ways can sexual sin become an idol? What are some
ways you see a cheapening of sexuality in society today?
3. What is the solution to a lustful heart?
(Matt. 5:27-30)
We’ve seen that the prohibition against adultery is an expression of
God’s desire for His people to live according to His design. We’ve also
seen that keeping this Commandment leads to life, while breaking this
Commandment leads to death and destruction. We know that adultery
tramples on the gift of marriage by polluting it with sexual immorality.
But how do we stay pure? In a fallen world, we will battle lust and
temptation. What do we do?
Session 8 99
The law focuses on the action of what not to do. Jesus, however, went
even further. Knowing that our actions and motives are marred by sin,
Further
Commentary Jesus claimed that even if we do not outwardly commit the sin of adultery,
we are guilty of sin because of our inward lusts. In Matthew 5, Jesus took
“ ‘Adultery’ usually referred
to sexual relations by the Seventh Commandment and went beyond the action to the heart:
a married person with
a partner other than
his or her spouse, but 27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’
v. 28 makes clear that 28 But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent
Jesus is not limiting his
commandments to married has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 If your right eye
people but speaking of causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you
sexual sin in general…
Christians must recognize lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell.
those thoughts and actions 30 And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away.
which, long before any
overt sexual sin, make the For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole
possibility of giving in to body go into hell.
temptation more likely, and
they must take dramatic
action to avoid them… According to Jesus, it’s not the hands and feet that lead us to adultery;
Literal self-mutilation
is not Christ’s objective. it’s the heart. Therefore, the solution to a lustful heart is not willpower or
It is quite possible to be self-discipline or self-mastery. It’s a heart transformation. The only solution
blind or crippled and
still lust. Rather, as is to an adulterous heart is to have our hearts changed by the gospel. Living
characteristic of Jesus’ in light of this change, we are to do whatever it takes to remain pure.
figurative and hyperbolic
style, he commands us How do we apply Jesus’ teaching in this passage? To begin with, we
to take drastic measures ought to recognize pornography as a form of adultery of the heart, just as
to avoid temptations to
sexual sin—to remove lustful thoughts and fantasies are. Whether in the form of visual pictures
from ourselves anyone or or erotic romance novels, pornography leads to more and more lust.
anything that could lead us
into scandal (‘causes you As those who have had our hearts transformed, we are called by Christ
to sin’)…Eternal judgment to go beyond the mere avoidance of adulterous actions and fight against
appears as the punishment
for those who fail to heed adulterous thoughts as well. This may mean giving up some of the movies
Jesus’ words. Sin that is not and television shows we watch. It may mean building in accountability
dealt with leads inexorably
to judgment. Jesus is not online or on our phones. If that seems too severe, just look at the severity
implying, however, that of Jesus’ warnings in verses 29-30. Better to lose something that leads us to
sexual sin cannot be
forgiven when there is sin rather than be thrown into hell!
true repentance.” 10 Stop and think for a moment: What in this lifetime is worth an eternity
–Craig L. Blomberg in hell? The Scriptures are clear that the pleasures of sexual sin last for a
moment. Eternity without Christ is suffering that will not end. The harsh
words of Jesus are for our good, meant to shake us out of our slumber.
If the earthly consequences of sexual sin aren’t enough to keep you from
falling, then consider the eternal consequences of unrepentant sin!
Proactively dealing with sexual sin and temptation does not mean
creating a checklist of legalistic requirements. It means our pursuit of
pleasure in God is greater than our pursuit of pleasure in the world.
So take a good look at your life. If you are currently in or close to an
adulterous relationship, end it immediately and confess. If you are addicted
to Internet pornography, get some accountability. There should be a sense
of urgency in fighting sexual sin.
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