Defending The Devil: My Story as Ted Bundy's Last Lawyer PDF
Preview Defending The Devil: My Story as Ted Bundy's Last Lawyer
DEFENDING THE DEVIL My Story as Ted Bundy's Last Lawyer POLLY NELSON ECHOPOINTBOOKS&MEDIA,LLC BRATTLEBORO,VERMONT Transcriptsofcourtproceedingsandinterviewsreproducedhereinhavebeeneditedforclarity.The namesofminorchildrenhavebeenchangedtoprotecttheirprivacy. PublishedbyEchoPointBooks&Media Brattleboro,Vermont www.EchoPointBooks.com Allrightsreserved. Neitherthisworknoranyportionsthereofmaybereproduced,storedinaretrievalsystem,or transmittedinanycapacitywithoutwrittenpermissionfromthepublisher. Copyright©1994,2018byPollyNelson DefendingtheDevil ISBN:978-1-62654-775-7(casebound) 978-1-62654-791-7(paperback) InteriordesignbyPaulChevannesCover designbyAdrienneNúñez PREFACE Ihaven'tparticipatedmuchindiscussionsaboutTedBundysinceIpublishedthisbookin1994.I havebeenhappytomoveon. Buttheupcoming30thanniversaryofhisexecutionhasrenewedinterestinTedBundy,andIama witnesstothathistory.SoIampublishingasecondeditiontomakeitavailabletothepubliconce again. Thisbookisanattempttodescribeascandidlyaspossiblemyownexperience,asanewlawyer unexpectedlytaskedwithpreventingahumanbeingfrombeingkilled.Itisnotadefinitivehistoryof TedBundy,noranapologyforhiscrimes.Thatitdoesnothonorthepreciouslivesofhisvictimsisa tellingomissionIonlypartlyunderstand. Thebookislooselydividedintofiveparts. •PartI.Ibecomealawyer,andTedBundybecomesmyfirstcase.Heisscheduledtobeexecutedin 12daysforthemurderofKimberlyLeach,oneofhistwodeathsentencesinFlorida. •PartII.TheU.S.SupremeCourtissuesastayofexecutionandIgettoknowmyclientandhispast. IprepareourcaseunderthesupervisionofJimColeman,abrilliantpartneratthefirm. •PartIII.TedBundyisscheduledtobeexecutedasecondtime.ThistimeforthemurdersattheChi OmegasororityhouseinTallahassee,Florida.Iamstillinmyfirstyearasalawyer. • PartIV.WegetdeepintoTed'spsychewiththehelpofrenownedforensicpsychiatrist,Dorothy OtnowLewis,andthecandidrecollectionsofTed'sfamilyandpreviouslawyers.Transcriptsfromour interviewsandcourttestimonyofwitnessesbaldlycontradictthecommonly-heldbelief(cherishedby Tedaswell)ofTedBundyasacleverandcontrolledmasterofhisownfate. •PartV.Tedisscheduledtobeexecutedforthethirdtime,againfortheKimberlyLeachmurder.Our carefullegalstrategyisdestroyedbyTed'simpulsivebehavior.Thenightbeforehisexecution,Ted reflectsonhislife. •PartVI.Idealwiththeaftermath. Aftercompletingthisbook,IservedontheD.C.BoardofParoleforsevenyears,whereI encounteredamorecommontypeofinmate.Primarilyguiltyofbeingblack,poor,andhyperactiveor drugaddicted,theylanguishuselesslybehindbars.Unlikespurnedpets,theyhavenochanceof rescue.Whenreleased,theyareevenmoredisadvantagedthanbefore,destinedtoliveoutsidean increasinglyunfathomablesociety. ThatisafargreatertravestythanTedBundy'sconvictionandexecution. But,atonetime,IwasTedBundy'slawyer,anditwashislifeIwassupposedtosave. PollyNelson November2018 PROLOGUE ThreeweeksafterTedwasexecuted,oneofthemanagingpartnersofthelawfirmcalledmetohis office.Thatwasunusualinitself.WhenIarrived,hegreetedmewarmly,shookmyhand,andinvited metositdown.From hiscornerofficeontheninthfloor,withaviewbeyondhisbalconyofthe steeplesandrooftopsofGeorgetown,theworldlookedverymanageable. Hesaidthat,firstofall,hewantedtocongratulatemeonajobexceptionallywelldoneonthe Bundycase.Probablynootherlawyerinthefirmwouldhavebeenabletohandleacaselikethat,he said,orstickwithittotheend.Thenhepassedanenvelopetomeandsaidthatitcontainedmy annualevaluation,andthathewasgladtoseethecommentswereallveryfavorable,amarked improvementoverthepreviousevaluation.Hehesitatedbeforehewenton. Onemorething,hesaid,finally.NowthattheBundycaseisover,youshouldgivesomethoughtto whatdirectionyou'dlikeyourcareertogoinfromhere.IsaidIwoulddothat,havingrealizedearlier thatIhadtodevelopanewspecialty. Therewasanothertellingmomentofsilence. Infact,hebeganagain,weshouldprobablydiscusssomesortoftimeframe.Whateverseemsfair- threemonths,sixmonths.Youshouldbeabletofindajobbythen.Youunderstand,hesaid,strictly fromapractice-managementpointofview,youcouldn'tbeallowedtostayatthefirmindefinitely. IwentbacktothefewpayingcasesIhadandtriedtosetaboutlookingforanewjob,butIhadn't beenabletodomuchofanythingsincetheexecution.Ithadbeenbadenoughbefore,butnowIcould barelyliftapenorcomposeasentence.Iwasafraidtoreturnphonecalls.Ikeptexpectingtofeel betterwithtime,nowthattheexecutionwasbehindmeandIwasfinallyrelievedoftheresponsibility ofsavingTed'slife.Instead,Ifeltworse.WhenIcouldnotworkanotherday,Ileft.Butthatdidn'tsolve myproblem. RepresentingTedBundycertainlywasthecaseofalifetime-justnotexactlyinthewayIthoughtit wouldbe. PARTI PollyNelson PollyNelson,Wilmer,Cutler&Pickeringyearbook,1985 CHAPTER1 IwasborntorepresentTedBundy. Fromanearlyage,itwasimportanttometomeettheneedsofothers,particularlythosewho seemedunhappy.Iwastheappleofmyunhappyparents'eyesandIwantedtomakethemhappy. WhenIwastwoyearsold,itisoftentold,mymotherandfatherlaughedsohardwhenIfelloffthe couchthatIcrawledbackupandfelloffagain.Andagainandagain. WhenIwasten,Ikepta"HomeforRetiredWorms"inthebackyard.NotbecauseIlikedworms,but becauseIthoughtthatitmustbeaterriblethingtobesouglyanddespicable.Mygrandfatherwasa LutheranpastorwhosesocialministrywasinformedbyChrist'swords:Whateveryoudofortheleast ofthem,youdoforme.Wormsseemedtoqualify.Iwateredapatchofground,madeanicemudbath, andbroughttoitwormsthathadbeenstrandedonthesidewalkafterarain.Iwantedthemnottofeel soaloneandashamedtobeworms,astheysurelymust.And,ofcourse,ifIwashelpingthem, makingthemfeelbetteraboutthemselves,Ihadnothingtofearfromthemmyself. IgrewupincentralMinnesota,anoldestchildwithfouryoungersiblingsandtwoparentswith problemsoftheirown.Growingup,theneedsofthosesixpeopleseemedmoreimportantthanmy own.Thebenefitofmypositionasthecompetentpersonmakingotherpeoplefeelbetterwas obvious:Iwasaveryimportantpersoninmyfamily.Thedownsidewasharderformetosee.Ihadno clueastomyownfeelings,needs,orwants,otherthantobeperfectanduseful,adisappointmentto noone.Theabsenceofpersonalfulfillmentorcontentmentdidn'tseemanyreasontoworry,however. Iwassureitwouldcometome.OnedayI'dfeellikemyself,knowwhatIliked,whatIwantedfor myself.RealLifewouldthenbegin. Itdidn'tbeginincollege.Iflounderedforsixyearswhileearningmyundergraduatedegree,unable tosettleonamajor.Foronething,itseemedtomemorallywrongtoseekadegreelikeeveryoneelse. AsIwasalreadyaveryimportantperson,itwasuntowardtoacceptsuch superfluoustrappings.AtfirstIwasinterestedinstatistics,thenIdroppedouttobecomeaweaver, studyinginSwedenandtravelingtheartfaircircuit.WhenIreturnedtoschool,Ibegantoworktoward becominganartteacher,butnobodywouldtalkaboutthewhyofteachingart.Whatproblemwerewe tryingtosolve?Icouldn'tgetmyselfinterestedunlesssomeonehadaproblemtheyneededmeto solve.Iswitchedtochildpsychology,wheretheproblemswere. Asgraduationunavoidablyapproached,Istillhadnotfoundanythinginsideofmetoactasaguide. IhadnodesiresofmyownthatIcoulddiscern.Inlieuofadiscerniblecareerpreference,Itookallthe civilservicetestsIqualifiedfor;thefirstresponsecamefromthedirectorofasmallcountywelfare agencyinnorthernMinnesota.Ihadnotraininginsocialwork;mychildpsychologyclasseshadbeen theoreticalratherthanclinical.But,asanoldestchild,IwassureIkneweverythingandcoulddo anything.Socialworkalsowasafamilytraditionamongtheclergyandlaypeopleonmymother'sside ofthefamily.Thejobofferhadacertainringofinevitabilitytoit.AttheMarshallCountyWelfare Department,inWarren,Minnesota,mymoralresponsibilitiesgrewfrommyfamilyofsixtoahundred troubledstrangers,andIseemedtoseeinallofthemahurtchildtobeacknowledged.Isomehow couldn'tdetachappropriately.WhenIhadtoremovechildrenfromanabusivehome,Ifeltthepainof theparents,theemptinessoftheirhome,thelongingofthechildrentoreturn.I'dfeelitallnightand ontheweekend.HowcouldIbehappy, enjoymyselfinmyoff-time,ifIwasresponsibleforsuchunhappiness?Ifoundtemporaryabsolution intheruraltavernswherefarmerswaitoutthewinter. Aftertwoyearsofdirectsocialwork,Iwasbeat.Ihadtormentedmyinvoluntaryclientswith unwantedhomevisits;Ihadfelttotallyresponsiblefortheirlives;andIhadneverfeltIwasdoing enough.Icouldn'tbeobjective.Ibecametooinvolved.IfelttooinadequatewhenIfoundIreally couldn'tdoanythingtochangesomeone'sdestiny.ImovedbacktoSt.PaulandtotheMinnesota DepartmentofPublicWelfare(DPW)forthenextthreeyears,licensingday-carefacilities.ThereI wasn'tdirectlyresponsibleforanyone.Ishouldhavebeenrelieved,butinsteadthejobfeltemptyand meaningless.Ifeltselfish,self-indulgent,enervated,andadrift.Icontinuedtodrink. IfIatleasthadalittlewiderrangeofinfluence,Ithought,perhapsI'dfeelfulfilledandlifewould beginforme.SincesocialworkhadfallenoutoffavorbythenandDPWwastoo-heavywithmasters ofsocialworkwithnoplacetogo,Idecidedtogetalawdegreetostandoutinthepack,becomea certifiedsmartperson.MaybethenI'dhaveachancetobepromotedtoapolicyposition,andthe powertomakerealchangesinthewelfaresystemwouldgivemesatisfactionatlast. Ihadonefinalsocialworkhurrah,justbeforeIleftapureshotofcaretakingadrenalin.Thestate hospitalemployeeshadgoneonstrike,andwebureaucratsatDPW weresenttowatchoverthe patients.OnenurseandIwereinchargeoffortyorsoseverelydisabledmentallyillpatients,mostof themlobotomizedduringthegreatpsychiatricexperimentsofthe1950sandnowbrain-friedbythe resultingseizures.Iplayedtheguitarforthem,watchedtheroyalweddingofCharlesandDianawith them(someclaimedtoberelatedtothegroom),andserveddoughnutsiftheywouldsitdownlike ladiesandgentlemen.AtnightIdranktooblivionwiththeothermanagementtemps.Itwasaperfect existence.Iwasneeded,andIwasstuckthere.NoneedtofigureoutwhatIshoulddoorwhatIwas supposedtowanttododay-to-day.IfeltthenearestIhadeverfelttobeingfullyalive. Lawschoolwasalittlelikethat,too.IstartedattheUniversityofMinnesotainthefallof1981, whenIwastwenty-nineyearsold.Iwasstillsingle.AlthoughI'vetried,Ihadn'tfoundamanwhowas willingtosolvetheproblemformeofwhoIwas.Shortofthat,Icouldonlytrytomindreadina relationshipguessathowtheotherpersonthoughtIwassupposedtoact-whichmadeeverything verycomplicatedforbothofus.Lawschoolwasmyrefuge.Threeyearsspokenfor,norealdecisions tomake,nootherresponsibilities,nottryingtochangeanyone;RealLifesuspendeduntilafter graduation.Ienjoyeditverymuch.AndbecauseIenjoyedit,because(unlikeformostlawstudents) lawschoolrepresentednotaburdenbutafreedomfromobligation,Ididprettywell. Iscrupulouslyavoidedanysubjecthavingtodowithdirectservicetopeople,courseslikefamily lawandcriminallaw.TheonethingIknewforcertainwasthatIwouldneveragaintakeonanother individual'sintractablepersonalproblems.WhenIwroteforthelawreview,Ichosethedriest,most masculinesubjectIcouldfind:thedefinitionofbuildingsandstructuralcomponentsforpurposesof theinvestmenttaxcredit.Thenextyear,aspresidentofthereview,Iusheredintopublicationeven moreesotericbusinessarticles-themoreuselessanddistantfromthelivesofrealhumanbeingsthe better.Bythetimegraduationneared,myhorizonshadexpandedbeyondmywildestdreams,certainly beyondDPWandhome.IhadnoideawhatelseIsmightwanttodowithmylawdegree,butwhenthe offerscameinfrombiglawfirmsinthebigcities,IsawaticketoutofmyoldlifeandintoRealLife. Surelythiswouldallleadsomewhere,somewhereI'dfeelathomeinmyownskin. Afterayear'sjudicialclerkshipwhichwasboringandtediousandwherereallifedefinitelydidnot begin--IwentontoWilmer,Cutler&PickeringinWashington.Ihadworkedthereforafewweeksthe summeraftermysecondyearoflawschool,andalthoughIactuallyhadabettertimethenext summer,whichIhadspentinNewYorkatCleary,Gottlieb,Steen&Hamilton,Iwassuspiciousofthat. GoingbacktoCleary,whereI'dhadsomuchfunandhadfeltsowelcome,seemed,well,tooobviously appealingtobetheproperchoice.Bewareofprettybaubles,Ithought.IguessedthatthereasonI'd beenlonelyandignoredatWilmerwasthatthelawyerstherehadsuchrichpersonallivesthatthey couldn'tbebotheredentertainingsummerassociates.ThatwaswhatIwantedformyself. Wilmer,Cutler&PickeringisoneofthoseWashingtonlawfirmsthatmajorcorporationsturnto whentheyareinreallybigtrouble.Theverynameevokessighsandreverentialmurmursfrom knowledgeablelawyersofalltypes.Acorporatefirmof150stellarlawyers,Wilmerwasrenownedfor takingoncomplicated,cutting-edgelitigationusuallyinvolvingpivotalmattersofpublicpolicy.To supportthatkindofchallenge,thefirmhadthepolicyandunquestionedabilitytoleavenostone unturnedinpursuingtheclient'sinterest.Noexpensewassparedeither,andtheychargedaccordingly. Asaresult,theywerepayingthetopgoingratethatyearfornewlawassociates:fortythousand dollarsayear-nearlythreetimesmysocialworksalary.OnmywayintotownIboughtmyfirstbrand- new,store-boughtbedmattressincelebrationofmyluxuriousnewlifetocome,andmovedrightinto anunbelievablygoodrentaldeal:Isharedafabuloussix-bedroomtownhousewithonlyoneother womanfor$450amonth.Iwastednotimeinfulfillinganotherfantasybyregisteringforregular facialsatTatyana'sSkinCareSalon,whosehand-letteredsigninthesecond-storywindowabovethe healthfoodsstoreonPStreetattractedmeimmediately:Itlookedlikeasalonwithintegrity. AtWilmerIwasassignedtothePIERgroup:productsliability,insurance,environmental,andother regulation.Myfirsttaskwastoresearchtherulesandregulationsforfrozendairyproducts;Itoldmy motherthatifI'dknownIcouldbedoingicecreamlaw,Imighthavegonetolawschoolsooner.My otherworkinvolvedexactingresearchonminuteissuesofobscureenvironmentallaw.Itwasn't alwaysasglamorousasitsounds. Naturally,ItookituponmyselfimmediatelyuponarrivalatWilmertoorganizetheothernew associates.Inaturallyassumedtheywereunhappyandneededmyattention.Igotthefirmtosponsor aChristmaspartyatmynewhomewhicheasilyheldthehundredorsopeoplewhoattended.Ordering enoughliquorhadbeenmyfirstpriority.Attheparty-atwhichIdidfeelasifRealLifehadbegun-a partnertoldme,withoutanyparticularjudgmentoremphasis,"You'redrunk,andyouweredrunkthe lasttimeIsawyou." Ihadbeenwaitingforsomeonetonotice.Inowcouldnotgowithoutadrinkwithoutasmany drinksasIcouldbeforepassingout-afterwork.Thatpartdidn'tfeellikereallife.Worse,sometimes "afterwork"wasstillatwork,withthefirm'sfrequent"happyhours."Iwasterrifiedoftheimpending consequences.Ihadmanagedtomoveforwardinmylife,jumpingfromicefloetoicefloewithout seemingtofail,andIdidnotwanttohumiliatemyselfonthisjob.Itseemedtobemylastbestchance tofind-oratleastinvent-myself.IhadnoPlanB. InearlyFebruary1986Iquitdrinkingwiththefirmestresolveever,withtheintentionofdryingout forsixmonthsandregainingsomecontrol.Withthatthelastapparentbarriertoreallifeeliminated,I expectedgreatthings. Instead,IgotTed.
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