Curing sexual performance anxiety: A mans guide to discover life long sexual health,erections, libido and vitality

48 Pages·2018·0.38 MB·English

by  Brian Powerz

Sexual Performance anxiety
Porn Can Change & Rewire Your Brain
Porn happens to be fantastic at forming new, long-lasting pathways in the brain.
Believe it or not, studies show that those of us who make more frequent use of
pornography have brains that are less connected, less active, and even smaller in
some areas. Thanks to modern science, now we know that the brain goes on
changing throughout life, constantly rewiring itself and laying down new nerve
connections, and that this is particularly true in our youth.
There’s some pretty fierce competition between brain pathways, and those that
don’t get used enough will likely be replaced. Use it or lose it, as they say. Only
the strong survive.
That’s where porn comes in.
Porn is such a ferocious competitor that hardly any other activity can compete
with it, including actual sex with a real partner. That’s right, porn can actually
overpower your brain’s natural ability to have real sex! Why? As Dr. Norman
Doidge, a researcher at Columbia University, explains, porn creates the the
perfect conditions and triggers the release of the right chemicals to make lasting
changes in your brain.
Doctors are seeing an epidemic of young men who,
because of their porn use, can’t get an erection with a
real, live partner.
Study after study has shown that porn is directly related to problems with
arousal, attraction, and sexual performance. Porn leads to less sex and to less
sexual satisfaction within a relationship. Researchers have shown a strong
connection between porn use and low sex drive, erectile dysfunction, and trouble
reaching orgasm. Many frequent porn users reach a point where they have an
easier time getting aroused by Internet porn than by having actual sex with a real
partner. One recent study even concluded that porn use was likely the reason for
low sexual desire among a random sample of high school seniors. Who ever
heard of that? Low sexual desire among high school seniors!

This trend of sex problems is especially serious for teens and young adults. Their
brains are particularly vulnerable to being rewired by porn, and they are in a
period where they are forming crucial attitudes, preferences, and expectations for
their future.
What is NoFap?
In short, the word “Fap” is onomatopoeia. That is, it’s the written sound of
masturbating. NoFap, however, refers to a website which hosts NoFap
challenges for the sake of dumping the porn addiction for a better, healthier and
all-around happier sex life. Really what NoFap aims at doing is to assist you,
through their programs, to keep the spark of great sex alive with any romantic
encounter you have.

To be 100% clear, NoFap does not encourage indefinite abstinence from
masturbation or sex, quite the opposite. The NoFap challenge was designed to
ensure that you are able to experience a deeper connection with a deeper sense of
intimacy with your partner by eliminating the need for porn or PMO (Porn and
Masturbation to Orgasm). It aims at rewiring one’s brain, which has, over time
and exposure to hard porn habits, become so dependent on the stimulation that
porn provides. This means that you get to decide where to set the balance after
your NoFap challenge is finished. But if you choose to abstain because you
know it may lead to a relapse, then you can choose to do so, as many others have
done too.

Cue the scores of comments about how non-release is bad for you and you stand
at risk of contracting prostate cancer if you do not release yourself. It’s
absolutely true that studies have shown that release can be extremely good for
your health. But note that the emphasis is on release and not self-release.

Many a time a porn addiction can get in the way of building good relationships,
and can lead to dependency. And that is the focus for the NoFap challenges:
kicking the PMO habit.
As the NoFap movement has grown, there’s been a notable variety of benefits
reported by the fapstronauts themselves. For some, the effects are astronomical,
for others the benefits are minimal but long-lasting. Whatever the case, if you
are dedicated to “rewiring and rebooting” you should have success and see
positive results.
Here’s a quick list of some of the benefits of taking on
the NoFap challenge

Increase in Confidence

Many fapstronauts have noted an increase in confidence when approaching
women and that they no longer felt awkward when talking to them. Some even
mentioned that their confidence has improved overall thanks because they no
longer have to hide something they were initially ashamed of. This brings us to
the next point…
Social life improves

Not everyone factors this as a major improvement, however there were a large
number of people who did mention that social situations which had been the
cause of anxiety pre-NoFap challenge were now actually quite enjoyable and
exciting after doing the 90 days. Some even saw immediate differences after just
a few days. This could be a huge part or be the direct result of the next point…

General and Sexual Anxiety dissipates

Porn really puts a limit on your ideas of healthy social interactions and
expectations. It causes objectification of women, even if we don’t mean for it to
happen. Everything in a porn movie is just…so…easy. The expectations put
huge amounts of strain on a person to perform well sexually and if this doesn’t
happen, well, then you could start developing serious anxiety. Thankfully, as
many fapstronauts have confirmed, all of this can be reversed with a zero PMO
period.

Motivation and inspiration increases

So many men have made mention that their desire to talk to women and initiate
flirting has increased exponentially after taking the challenge. Possibly the best
part of it all is that flirting seems to happen more spontaneously and easier for
many of the men who mentioned motivation as one of their biggest NoFap
benefits. However, this motivation is not only isolated to flirting with women,
it’s a general motivation which increased the drive to take on projects or
situations and be productive in them for longer periods of time.

Respect
Many feel that they are now receiving more respect from men and women alike.
This may have something to do with the increased confidence, but it could also
have something to do with the increase in testosterone, which is suggested to
increase after the seventh day of the challenge.

Enhanced connections

To really appreciate your partner during sex, you have to put aside what you’re
thinking of and rather experience her than the sex. The fact that the 90-day
period enhances your connection to women, and other people is one of the more
mentioned benefits along with some of the physical benefits like being more
present during sex, enjoying it much more and experiencing quicker arousal that
was more pleasurable than the arousal received from porn. The more pleasurable
arousal makes for a more pleasurable release.

Deeper emotions

Not as common on the thread, but still common enough to mention is the fact
that there were many who listed deeper, clearer emotions as a benefit.
Among those deeper emotions were:

Less frenzied interactions with people, but also a less frenzied interaction with
the self.

A clearer mind, which meant clearer reactions to situations
a greater capacity for compassion, empathy and care.

A sense of calm throughout the day.
Some of the physical benefits:

Again, these are benefits that Reddit users themselves have mentioned
throughout the NoFap threads.

More energy to tackle new experiences and finish old projects
Clear(er) skin
Harder erections
More pleasurable sex
PIED eradication
Increased strength and endurance when it comes to physical activities
Mental clarity as opposed to the brain fog pre NoFap challenge

To really gain from the full spectrum of benefits, it’s suggested to stick to the
challenge 100%. Not easy, for sure, but perhaps it helps to remember that your
goal is not to abstain from fapping indefinitely. Your goal is to re-wire your
brain in order to keep your focus on the connection and intimacy of being with
another person and experiencing real euphoria as opposed to experiencing a
temporary rush of dopamine that’s not rooted in reality (and leaves some feeling
guilty).
Boosting Your Sex Drive
Some of you may not need this section, however if you have problems with this,
you will most likely need to get this settled before you can start any of the other
exercises. I know some people that, even in their sixties and sometimes
seventies, still feel the need to ejaculate every day. Then I know people like me,
who in his early twenties, almost completely lost the urge to have sex. Scary,
huh? But this advice could work for anyone who is starting to see a decrease in
libido (sex drive). If you notice your sex drive has decreased or disappeared,
mixed with feelings of weakness and depression, you might have a decreased
testosterone level. Certain other things may cause a lack of sex drive, including
lack of sleep, medication, disease, or being out of shape. Too much stress also
reduces sex drive. Stress increases the stress hormone, known as cortisol, which
in excess causes your body to turn into fight-or-flight mode. After a little while
of this, your testosterone levels plummet. Get some exercise (cardio or weight
training); it is a good form of overcoming stress and depression. Meditation is
very useful to help clean up your mind, which in turn makes your body feel
better, reduces cortisol, and indirectly works to improve your sex drive.

Alcohol lowers sex drive as well, and it is a cumulative effect. Lots of alcohol
over a period of time can literally demolish a sex drive. Now remember, every
body is different. While some people aren’t affected at all by the above causes,
just a couple of drinks are enough to destroy another person's urge and ability to
have sex. The good news is with some rehab and cleansing, your drive will
return to normal. Try to limit the nights you go out binge drinking.

Smoking marijuana has been found to reduce your testosterone levels for up to
24 hours after smoking, but your levels return to normal after that 24 hour
period.
Massaging your testicles daily in the shower is a good way to keep your
testosterone producing factories in top shape. This does not require any specific
technique; just warm your testicles under the hot water, and gently massage each
one between your fingers…every once in a while, grab the skin between the
testicles and pull down or out slightly and hold. Switch back and forth between
massaging and pulling. Two to three minutes is good enough. Weightlifting,
with heavy weights, gives you a major boost to your testosterone levels and sex
drive. It has to be heavy weights (in relation to how much you can lift), like
weight where you can only do 6 or 7 repetitions. Do a few sets of these, and you
will feel the effects immediately (make sure to warm up with lighter weight, of
course). The muscle groups that produce the most testosterone when worked out
are the chest, back and legs. Different bench press workouts and squats are
highly recommended. Build some muscle in your glutes and quads, and you’ll
literally have a testosterone storage built down there.

Make sure not to work out the same muscle groups one day after the other; like
don’t work out quads two days in a row. Not giving your muscles enough time
to rest leads to overtraining, and overtraining will significantly reduce your
testosterone levels.

You want to make sure to eat about two hours before you workout. You can’t
work out while hungry, but you can’t be digesting either. Digestion takes
energy, and so does lifting weights. If you workout too soon after eating, you
will be digesting at the same time as working out, and you will do both processes
less efficiently. This can also lead to overtraining. Eat meals with a healthy
portion of carbohydrates, protein, and make sure to throw in some fruits and
vegetables.

Drink lots of water, breathe well, and take sufficient breaks between workouts.
This oxygen increase is good for muscle growth, and prevents overtraining.

You also want to eat as soon after working out as possible. These don’t have to
be big meals, but you do need to “feed” your muscles.

In order to best burn fat and gain muscle, you actually want to eat more, contrary
to what you may be thinking. While you don’t exactly want to eat a larger
portion of food, you do want to eat more meals. Four or five smaller meals
evenly spread out through the day is better than a large breakfast, lunch and
dinner. This keeps your metabolism going.
Another positive aspect of weightlifting: the more muscle you have present on
your body, the faster you actually burn fat. This can become a positive cycle,
and besides looking and feeling better, this will lead to a much stronger sex
drive.

Pushups are great as well. They work to strengthen your upper body, and can
increase the muscle mass in your torso. This increased muscle mass can
improve your testosterone production. While it is no replacement for weight
training, it is a good compliment to it. Remember not to work out the same
muscle group every day, so take a rest day between push-up workouts. Try and
push your limits. I started out doing 40 pushups, and I have now gotten to 80…
in a relatively short amount of time. I feel much stronger, larger, and more solid,
and have noted an increase in sex drive since adding these to my workout.

Aerobic exercises are good for getting your blood circulation going, which helps
for overall health and erection quality, and increasing your endurance, but don’t
overdo it. Too much can actually have the opposite effect, a decrease in
testosterone. Also having a lot of fat around the stomach can cause a higher
production of estrogen. However, the workouts can counteract that effect.

A great supplement for testosterone production is “ZMA”. It contains Zinc,
Monomethionine Aspartate, Magnesium Aspartate and vitamin B. After I had
taken it for a couple of weeks, it gave me a crazy boost in sex drive. I also lifted
crazy amounts of weight thanks to this. I weigh about 155 pounds and I
managed to lift 275 lbs one time by myself in bench press, without any help
from a spot. As a side effect it also helps facilitate sleep.

As I mentioned, lack of sleep has a diminishing effect on sex drive as well. It
also raises your Cortisol levels. If you are having problems sleeping: reduce
your stress, eat better, get some exposure to sunlight for natural Vitamin D,
which produces melatonin (your sleepy hormone), make sure to exercise (no
more than two hours before sleeping), and cut out the TV at least an hour before
sleeping. Sleep is essential to sex drive! If you are still having problems, please
visit your doctor.