Coping with Life and Death: Jewish Families in the Twentieth Century

376 Pages·1999·24.86 MB·English

by  Peter Y. Medding

STUDIES IN
CONTEMPORARY
JEWRY
The publication of
Studies in Contemporary Jewry
has been made possible through the generous assistance
of the Samuel and Althea Stroum Philanthropic Fund,
Seattle, Washington
THE AVRAHAM HARMAN INSTITUTE
OF CONTEMPORARY JEWRY
THE HEBREW UNIVERSITY
OF JERUSALEM
COPING WITH LIFE AND DEATH
Jewish Families in the
Twentieth Century
STUDIES IN
CONTEMPORARY
JEWRY
AN ANNUAL
XIV
1998
Edited by Peter Y. Medding
Published for the Institute by
OXFORD UNIVERSITY PRESS
New York • Oxford
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Copyright © 1998 by Oxford University Press, Inc.
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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Coping with life and death : lewish families in the twentieth century
/ edited by Peter Y. Medding.
p. cm. — (Studies in comempory Jewry. ISSN 0740-8625 ;
14)
At head of title: Avraham Harman Institute of Contemporary Jewry,
the Hebrew University of Jerusalem.
Papers presented at a symposium,
ISBN 0-19-512820-6
1. Jewish families—History—20th century—Congresses.
2. Holocaust, Jewish (1939-1945)—Book reviews. 3. Jews—History—
Book reviews. 4. Jewish literature—Book reviews.
5. Judaism—20th century—Book reviews. 6. Israel—Book reviews.
I. Medding, Peter. II. Avraham Harman Institute of Contemporary
Jewry. III. Series.
DS125.S75 no. 14
909'.04924 s—dc21
[306.85'089924J 98-31030
3 5 7 9 8 6 4 2
Printed in the United States of America
on acid-free paper
STUDIES IN CONTEMPORARY JEWRY
Editors
Jonathan Frankel
Peter Y. Medding
Ezra Mendelsohn
Eli Lederhendler
Institute Editorial Board
Michel Abitbol, Mordecai Altshuler, Haim Avni, David Bankier, Avraham Bargil,
Yehuda Bauer, Daniel Blatman, Sergio DellaPergola, Sidra DeKoven E/rahi, Allon
Gal, Moshe Goodman, Yisrael Gutman, Menahem Kaufman, Israel Kolatt, Hagit
Lavsky, Pnina Morag-Talmon, Dalia Ofer, Gideon Shimoni, Geoffrey Wigoder
Managing Editors
Laurie E. Fialkoff
Hannah Levinsky-Koevary
International Advisory and Review Board
Chimen Abramsky (University College, London); Abraham Ascher (City University of New
York); Arnold Band (University of California, Los Angeles); Doris Bensimon (Universite
de la Sorbonne Nouvelle); Bernard Blumenkrantz (Centre National de la Recherche Scien-
tifique); Solomon Encel (University of New South Wales); Henry Feingold (City University of
New York); Martin Gilbert (University College London); Zvi Gitelman (University of Michi-
gan); S. Julius Gould (University of Nottingham); Paula Hyman (Yale University); Lionel
Kochan (Oxford Centre for Hebrew and Jewish Studies); David Landes (Harvard University);
Seymour Martin Lipset (George Mason University); Heinz-Dietrich Lowe (Albert-Ludwigs-
Universitat); Michael Meyer (Hebrew Union College—Jewish Institute of Religion, Cincin-
nati); Alan Mintz (Brandeis University); George Mosse (University of Wisconsin); Gerard
Nahon (Centre Universitaire d'Etudes Juives); F. Raphael (Universite des Sciences Humaines
de Strasbourg); Jehuda Reinharz (Brandeis University); Monika Richarz (Germania Judaica,
Kolner Bibliothek zur Geschichte des deutschen Judentums); Joseph Rothschild (Columbia
University); Ismar Schorsch (Jewish Theological Seminary of America); Michael Walzer
(Institute for Advanced Study); Bernard Wasserstein (Oxford Centre for Hebrew and Jewish
Studies); Ruth Wisse (Harvard University).
This page intentionally left blank
Preface
From the day they are born, all human beings cope with life and death, and to a very
large extent they do so in family units. They must learn to live with themselves and
with others, to be individuals and members of families, and of the other groups to
which they or their families belong. Moreover, it is within these manifold family and
group settings that individuals deal with the particular exigencies encountered at the
various stages of the life cycle. At the same time, they constantly confront dying and
the deaths of others—near and far, at all ages, due to a variety of natural and unnat-
ural causes—illness, degeneration, suicide, disaster, accident, crime and war. How-
ever it occurs, death ruptures the individual life cycle, rends the bonds to family and
sometimes destroys the family unit itself.
Just as individuals act in life and encounter death as members of family units, so,
too, the family functions as a unit in taking into account the life needs, and dealing
with the death, of their members. And yet, while death is always terminal for the in-
dividual, it is usually not so for the family and the other groups to which the individ-
ual belongs. These continue to function as collective units, and maintain their exis-
tence over succeeding generations. What is more, the death of an individual enters
into the life of the group—in a direct personal sense in the case of the surviving mem-
bers of the family, and as part of the collective memory and identity of broader groups,
especially if the circumstances surrounding that death are associated with group
membership, and even more so if the ultimate survival of the group is threatened.
Above and beyond the universals, the particular character of the challenges of life
and death reflect broader social contexts and historical circumstances. Persons, fam-
ilies, groups and societies do not face the same challenges, and they react to them dif-
ferently. This volume examines the role of families and of family relationships in con-
tributing and reacting to, and in coping with, distinctive aspects of life and death
among Jews in the twentieth century. The approach is multidisciplinary, offering an-
thropological, sociological, demographic, political, economic, cultural, literary and
historical analyses of challenges to, changes in, new forms of, and alternatives to
Jewish family life in a variety of different social and national contexts. Its focus is ex-
temely broad—on family and family-type relationships among Jews rather than on
"the Jewish family," actual or mythical.
Thus, it analyzes what goes on inside families and between families: how and why
families are formed, how they socialize their members into the larger ethnic and na-
tional environment; how they equip their members to cope with external necessities
and challenges, and protect and threaten their individual members in normal times
and in extremis; how they serve as means and vehicles, and obstacles, for a variety
of individual aspirations and desires, and for collective goods and needs, while being
viii Preface
maintained as ends in themselves; how other bodies and institutions take up the slack
or are called upon to undertake functions and supply family needs that the family it-
self is no longer able or willing to fulfill; and how some of these serve as "surrogate
families," providing a range of services cloaked in the language and imagery of the
family.
More specifically, five broad themes are prominent in the articles in the sympo-
sium that follows: family and identity—the role of families in creating, transmitting
and changing identity, and the role of identity in forming, supporting and restructur-
ing the family; the realities of life in families—their responses to individual needs
and aspirations, economic imperatives and societal and communal values and ex-
pectations, in both normal and abnormal times; family and community—how fami-
lies reinforce, serve, represent and undermine community, and how community sup-
ports, protects, maintains, weakens, replaces and threatens family; family and the
nation-state—the nation as the family writ large and personal bereavement as national
memorial! zation, and the impact of the loss of children in war upon surviving parents;
and finally, the limits of family and the limits to family.
Once again, I am indebted to our managing editors, Laurie Fialkoff and Hannah
Levinsky-Koevary, for overseeing the publication of this volume, with their usual
deep commitment, admirable patience, eminent good cheer and superb editorial abil-
ities. This public expression of gratitude to them is but a small token of appreciation
for a contribution of inestimable worth.
Once more, it is a pleasure to express our appreciation to the Samuel and Althea
Stroum Foundation for their generous support of Studies in Contemporary Jewry
since its inception. Additional funds making possible the publication of this volume
were also received from the Lucius N. Littauer Foundation and the Federman Fund,
and their contributions are gratefully acknowledged.
P.Y.M.
Contents
Symposium
Coping with Life and Death: Jewish Families
in the Twentieth Century
Herbert C. Kelman, The Place of Ethnic Identity in the Development
of Personal Identity: A Challenge for the Jewish Family, 3
Riv-Ellen Prell, Marriage, Americanization and American Jewish Culture,
1900-1920, 27
Stephen J. Whitfield, Making Fragmentation Familiar: Barry Levinson's
Avalon, 49
Carmel Ullman Chiswick, The Economics of Contemporary American
Jewish Family Life, 65
Bruce Phillips, Children of Intermarriage: How "Jewish"? 81
Shaul Stampfer, What Happened to the Extended Jewish Family? Jewish
Homes for the Aged in Eastern Europe, 128
Dalia Ofer, Cohesion and Rupture: The Jewish Family in East European
Ghettos During the Holocaust, 143
Menachem Friedman, The "Family-Community" Model in Haredi Society,
166
Meira Weiss, "We Are All One Bereaved Family": Personal Loss and
Collective Mourning in Israeli Society, 178
Essays
Yaakov Ariel, Evangelists in a Strange Land: American Missionaries in
Israel, 1948-1967, 195