Control the Crazy: My Plan to Stop Stressing, Avoid Drama, and Maintain Inner Cool

233 Pages·2012·1.05 MB·English

by  Vinny Guadagnino

This book is Vinny’s story about how he personally manages his general anxiety disorder. It is
not meant to dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of
treatment for anxiety disorders or similar conditions. Each individual dealing with emotional
health issues such as anxiety or depression may experience different symptoms and may benefit
from potential treatment approaches such as lifestyle changes, talk therapy, and/or medication.
We strongly recommend that you consult with your doctor about questions and concerns specific
to your health. The authors and publisher expressly disclaim responsibility for any adverse effects
that may result from the use or application of the information contained in this book.
Copyright ©2012 by Vincent Guadagnino All rights reserved.
Published in the United States by Crown Archetype, an imprint of the Crown Publishing Group, a
division of Random House, Inc., New York.
www.crownpublishing.com
Crown Archetype with colophon is a trademark of Random House, Inc.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available upon request.
eISBN: 978-0-307-98725-9
Jacket design by Michael Nagin
Jacket photography © Robert Trachtenberg
v3.1
To all my teachers who have inspired me,
and to friends and family who’ve helped me along.
Thank you for sharing this message with me.
I hope to do you proud.
CONTENTS
Cover
Title Page
Copyright
Dedication
Introduction: Have You Heard?
MY JOURNEY
PART ONE
The Story Behind the Story
What the Funk?
Back in the Ring
The Fight Ain’t Over
MY TRIPLE-THREAT PROGRAM
PART TWO
MIND
1 Cool Your Ego
2 Get Real
3 Wake Up
BODY
4 Hit the Gym
5 Keep It Clean
6 You Gotta Breathe
SPIRIT
7 Give Until It Hurts
8 ABG—Always Be Grateful
9 Flip the Switch
10 Maintain
Epilogue: One Hundred Percent
Vinny’s Reading List
Acknowledgments
About the Author
INTRODUCTION: HAVE YOU
HEARD?
I’m best known as the “peacekeeper,” the “voice of reason,” and the
most “level-headed, drama-free” guido on MTV’s Jersey Shore, yet there’s
more to Vinny G than meets the eye.
What most people don’t know about me—including, until recently, not
even my own mother—is that my head is not often that level. The truth
is, I suffer from chronic anxiety. I can work myself up into a fearful,
paralyzing state of mind that can last for days, weeks, and even months
where I feel mad scared, totally isolated and alone, overwhelmed, and
completely out of control. Imagine being stuck in a bad dream you can’t
wake up from. This is how I often feel—except it’s not a dream, but the
relentless voice in my own head I can’t shake.
There have been many times in my life when my anxious mind has
spun so out of control that I’ve simply had to bail. Packing my bags and
walking off the set of Jersey Shore is one example. Leaving college is
another. I’m talking anxiety that causes night sweats, insomnia, extreme
weight loss, headaches, and a mind that won’t shut the ’eff up! For real, I
can get low, and when I’m in my low-down dark and scary place, I feel
crazy.
It turns out that the real Vinny Guadagnino has a pretty serious
condition—generalized anxiety disorder. I share my struggle with more
than forty million people in the United States alone who are living with
some sort of anxiety disorder. But what separates me from most adults
and teens who suffer from anxiety, stress, and feeling overwhelmed with
what life is throwing them is that I’ve spent the past three years taking
charge of my mental challenge by developing a step-by-step program
that not only has helped me get a handle on my anxious mind but has
also filled me with a sense of personal power and control that has rocked
every area of my life, from building a dream team of friends and
colleagues to meeting super cool girls, getting in the best physical shape
I’ve ever been in, and landing awesome career opportunities.
Sounds good, right? You want a piece of the action? If you can relate
to the kind of “crazy” mind I’m describing here, you picked up the right
book. Or if you’re someone who only occasionally feels low, what I offer
in the pages ahead can help you, too.
Check it: the book you hold in your hands isn’t just for people who
struggle with a generalized anxiety disorder like I do. You don’t have to
have something “serious” or diagnosable to learn a few tricks from me.
Having a mind that sometimes takes a run on you is more normal than
you might think. The truth is that from time to time, most people let
their thoughts get them down and allow their emotions to stand in their
way. The program I developed is for anyone who gets generally stressed,
nervous, frustrated, pissed off, sad, and occasionally feels knocked
around by life. (I can’t speak for you, but that about covers everyone I
know.) Work pressure, family conflict, financial baggage, relationship
drama, academic trouble, poor body image, and low self-esteem—on any
given day these challenges can get the best of us. Any and all of them
can make us feel crazy.
When I was at my lowest point, I had a hard time finding the right
book to help me control my crazy, one that spoke to me on my level.
Much of the self-help mumbo jumbo on the shelves, books you’d find in
a doctor’s office with titles like It’s Gonna Get Worse Before It Gets Better,
left me feeling more messed up and confused than I had before I opened
the cover. I felt the doctor, expert, professor, or whoever didn’t
understand my experience or really get where I was coming from.
That’s when I started reading a different type of book—titles that were
more “spiritual” in nature (as in written by hard-core Buddhist monks,
not psychologists); and I’m not kidding—as soon as I started reading
them, my life began to change. The more I learned about the mind-body-
spirit “triple-threat” approach to mental health, the better I felt and the
faster I regained control of my life. Then it hit me. What if I tried to fill
the void? Since I hadn’t easily found the right motivational message to
guide me when I needed it most, others who were suffering might be
coming up empty too. Maybe there was a way I could pass on what I’d
learned in one easy-to-read guidebook, one that kids and adults I knew
could relate to and understand.
Control the Crazy is my no-bullshit program for doing just that—
getting a handle on the everyday challenges that mentally, physically,
and spiritually trip us up. It includes my adaptation and translation of
many key teachings and techniques by some of the most popular and
influential spiritual teachers, philosophers, and masters in the field of
personal growth today. To keep it interesting, I’ve included my own
stories, insights, and mental workouts for kicking anxiety’s ass and
overcoming everyday high-stress situations.
My program is specifically designed so you can apply it to your own
life, whoever you are. You see, Control the Crazy doesn’t dwell so much
on what stresses you out or what you struggle with. No matter. We’ve all
got something. What’s most important is that whatever’s got you down,
you have a set of simple, kick-ass tools that you can pull out of your
back pocket and put to use right away.
Control the Crazy will specifically help you:
Deal with drama and life’s little annoyances without “losing” it
Manage haters, bullies, and negative people in your life
Bounce back from benders, binges, and hangovers
Boost your confidence so you kill it at work or in school
Give you focus and mad game with the opposite sex
Develop stronger relationships with your peeps
Maintain your inner cool when you’re on the verge of feeling
“crazy”
How does it work? When I went looking for the tools to beat back my
anxiety and my low-down, dark and scary moods, I discovered that if I
could simply master my mind, I could control my bad days rather than
let them control me. Whether you realize it or not, it’s the critical and
self-defeating voice in your own head that often spins a crappy situation
to a whole new level of crazy. Said a different way—you’ve got the
power. You can handle anything and anyone when you simply change how
you think.
Maybe you’re wondering—What gives Vinny Guadagnino of Jersey
Shore—a show famous for fist pumping, hooking up, and delivering at
least one good punch in the face in every episode—the credibility to
write a book like this? I mean, who do I think I am? How can I be taken
seriously?
Believe me, I’ve heard it all before. I’ve read blogs that are “shocked” I
even know how to put a sentence together. If you’re confused by what
you thought I was all about and what you’re reading here, let me clear
something up for you—yes, I like to party, and I also have a brain. Not
only that, I’ve got the best credibility of all: I’ve been there and I’ve come
out on the other side. It’s true, I’m not a shrink or a doctor, an expert, or a
priest. I’m just a twenty-four-year-old kid who’s made a name for himself
on a reality TV show. In many ways, my life and career are just getting
started. Still, I’ve been through a lot for my age, so what I do have is life
experience. I get it on a personal level. I’ve struggled. I still struggle, and
I’ve discovered that there’s a way to get through it. I want you to know
you aren’t alone.
You see—it doesn’t matter who you are—life is hard. Every day, I
meet kids and adults, either at the club, on set, or in my favorite
barbershop on Staten Island, who are stressed out, unhappy, and caught
up in their own negative drama and who I think could benefit from the
same tools that have helped me.
While I may be most recognized for my T-shirts, tattoos, and
manicured eyebrows, I believe that the most important role you can play
in life is to be of service to other people. I know—awww, shucks—but it’s
the truth. Nothing makes me happier and gives me a sense of purpose
more than helping people who need a hand. Sure, the “me-me-me”
celebrity lifestyle is a rush, I’m not gonna lie. But fame and a loaded
bank account don’t mean a thing if you’re suffering. I know better than
anyone that you can’t enjoy the good life if you’re operating from a dark
place. I’ve struggled with anxiety for most of my young adult life, and I
consider myself extremely blessed that whenever life trips me up and I
stumble and fall, I have the tools in my back pocket to pick myself back
up.
Now it’s your turn. Is life getting you down? Do you need a hand?
Then take mine and let me help you.