Bi: Bisexual, Pansexual, Fluid, and Nonbinary Youth PDF
Preview Bi: Bisexual, Pansexual, Fluid, and Nonbinary Youth
i b b i Bisexual, Pansexual, Fluid, and Nonbinary Youth Ritch C. Savin- Williams NEW YORK UNIVERSITY PRESS New York NEW YORK UNIVERSITY PRESS New York www.nyupress.org © 2021 by New York University All rights reserved References to Internet websites (URLs) were accurate at the time of writing. Neither the au- thor nor New York University Press is responsible for URLs that may have expired or changed since the manuscript was prepared. Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Names: Savin-Williams, Ritch C., author. Title: Bi : bisexual, pansexual, fluid, and nonbinary youth / Ritch C. Savin-Williams. Description: New York : New York University Press, [2021] | Includes bibliographical references and index. Identifiers: LCCN 2021011915 | ISBN 9781479811434 (hardback ; alk. paper) | ISBN 9781479811465 (ebook) | ISBN 9781479811472 (ebook other) Subjects: LCSH: Bisexual youth. | Bisexuality. | Sexual minority youth. Classification: LCC HQ74 .S28 2021 | DDC 306.76/50835—dc23 LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2021011915 New York University Press books are printed on acid- free paper, and their binding materials are chosen for strength and durability. We strive to use environmentally responsible suppliers and materials to the greatest extent possible in publishing our books. Manufactured in the United States of America 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 Also available as an ebook To the love of my life, Kenneth Miles Cohen Contents Preface ix Introduction 1 Part I: Understanding Bisexuality 1. Bisexuality Now 9 2. Men: Stories across the Bisexual Continuum 16 3. Women: Stories across the Bisexual Continuum 30 4. Generational Rebellion 42 5. Who Is Bisexual? 54 6. Straights Having Sex with Each Other 65 7. Why Romance Matters 77 8. How Many Bisexuals Are There? 92 Part II: The Sexual and Gender Spectrum 9. Pansexuality 113 10. Fluidity 131 11. Genderqueer and Nonbinary 152 12. Gender Variance and Gender Toxicity 162 Part III: Bisexuals Are Not All the Same 13. Race and Ethnicity Matter 179 14. Bi in the Country 208 vii viii | Contents Part IV: Beyond a Singular Bisexuality 15. Bisexualities: What Needs to Change 225 16. Postidentity Revolution 244 Acknowledgments 261 Methodological Appendix 263 Notes 271 Index 305 About the Author 313 Preface Nearly four decades ago, an influential psychiatrist suggested that bisexuality does not exist. By denying individuals can have attractions to more than one sex, he was not alone then or now. Just over a decade ago, the most famous sex therapist in the United States, Dr. Ruth, con- curred: Bisexuality is “an in- between stage,” and “there really is no such thing as being bisexual.” Subsequent scientists, clinical practitioners, educators, and the general public appeared to agree, creating in their wake a dilemma for those who thought otherwise, those living lives that were neither straight nor gay but something else. Were they merely in transition to their ultimate gay or lesbian identity, or when they meet the perfect woman or man, they will become straight? Other supposed truisms also confused them: sexual orientation is an either/or category, not a continuum with gradation marks; knowledge about deviant sexu- ality can be gleaned from a small number of clinical patients; and, if one identifies as bisexual, then they suffer from psychological and emotional conflicts such as having a split personality, manifesting a self-d estructive rage directed at the self, and displaying a crushing dependency on oth- ers. In other words, they were either straight or gay, and thus there is no need for a book on bisexuality— except in courses on clinical psychol- ogy, sociology of deviance, and public health.1 These beliefs would now shock many Millennials and Zoomers (Gen Zers) who are living a life inconsistent with these caricatures. The docu- mented clinical and scientific “truths” do not resemble their lives, and as a result, many bisexual, pansexual, fluid, and nonbinary activists chal- lenge these very ideas. In their wake, they have created a bisexuality that defies traditional views, disputes false notions, and reimagines sexuality, with regard to both practice and identity. Broadly speaking, many young ix
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