Anal sexuality and tabo

30 Pages·2013·0.3 MB·English

Heterosexual
 Anal
 Sexuality
 and
 Taboo

What
 exactly
 is
 taboo?
 Where
 does
 it
 come
 from
 and
 what
 does
 it

mean
 in
 the
 antropological
 sense?
 And
 what
 exactly
 is
 anal
 sex?

Nobody
 really
 speaks
 of
 it
 so
 what
 does
 it
 entail
 and
 who
 engages
 in

it?
 Can
 anal
 sex
 be
 interpretated
 as
 a
 current
 taboo
 in
 our
 society
 and

if
 so,
 how?
 Why?
 And
 to
 what
 degree?
 And
 furthermore,
 what
 can

this
 tell
 us
 about
 our
 social
 life?
 Through
 literary
 reseach
 and

information
 obtained
 through
 my
 personal
 circle,
 these
 questions
 will

be
 adressed
 in
 this
 thesis.

Nienke
 van
 Dijk

Student
 nr:
 6091687

May
 20,
 2013

Supervisor:
 Flip
 Lindo

Word
 count:
 12.445
Contents

Introduction 2

Anal Sex 3
Anal sex; a historic overview 4
Anal sexuality and its association with homosexuality 4
Defining anal sex 5
Heterosexual anal sex 7

Theories on taboo 9

Taboo & Heterosexual Anal Sex 11
Uncleanness and Hygiene 12
Sex-roles 15
Homosexuality 18
Risks 19
Taboo and values 22

Conclusion 23

Bibliography 28

  1
Introduction
A few days ago I went to my parents for the weekend, I knew my mother was very anxious to
know what my bachelor dissertation subject was going to be. I had mystified it over the phone
when she had asked about my progress, because I would not (dare) tell her over the phone. If I
told her in that manner, I would not be able to see her facial reaction and would not know if
she really understood, or if she was actually repulsed by the idea.
She knew I would write about taboo but not yet on which subject. When she picked
me up from the station and we were in the car together I felt the moment when she would ask
what my subject was and why I had handled it so secretive come nearer. With that, I felt my
nerves growing, as if I had to admit something to her I had done wrong and she would be
disappointed in me. When we entered the house and she had not yet asked me, I thought I had
better tell her myself, now, and tell her fast, just like ripping of a band-aid, fast and (almost)
painless. ‘Mom, do you know what my dissertation subject is?’ ‘No’ she exclaimed
enthusiastically, ‘are you finally going to tell me?’ I felt my head redden, became very
conscious of my beating heart and felt the formation of a tight knot in my stomach, which I
always associate with stress. ‘It is anal sex’ I told her bluntly. She looked at me with raised
eyebrows and plainly a look of shock on her face. I felt myself going redder and redder; I
tried to smile but felt my face contort in an apologetic grimace. As if I wanted to say, ‘but that
does not mean anything, I am still the same me’. She stared at me and it felt like minutes
passed. Then she slowly said ‘Ok’ and looked away from me at the floor, still with that
shocked expression on her face. I did not speak, and gave her a few moments to contemplate
the new information. Then she said with a dry smile, ‘well I think it is definitely a taboo’.
I think she is right. I had difficulty in telling my own mother, even though I can talk to
her about anything in my life, if I feel the need to. My mother is a very understanding woman,
and still I was afraid of her reaction. I was afraid to tell my mother, but I did tell her;
however, I was or am more afraid to tell my father, so afraid that I decided not to tell him. I
have not told him yet and I probably will not tell him in the near future. I did not tell him
because I thought he would not understand the reasons behind it and I was, or am, afraid that
he would think that the reason behind my subject decision would rely on my own interest in
the subject that I would want to find out more about anal sex for personal reasons. That
conversation would just make us both very uncomfortable and I decided against having it. I
did know however that my mother would tell him, but I also knew she would tell him after the
weekend, when I had gone back to home. That is how delicate this subject is, at least between
my parents and me. My father is a man who, I think I can say, likes, for the fun of it, to make

  2
people feel a bit awkward, and then especially his children. He knows that I tell my mother
more than I tell him, and we both know that my mother will tell my father what I told her. So
when he hears something from my mother, especially something I should be ashamed of, like
a bad grade or when I have had too much to drink, he likes to ask me about it. I think he finds
it funny to see my reaction, he knows I did not tell him on purpose and he likes to stress that
by making me feel uncomfortable in showing me he found out anyway. That is my father.
Naturally I am afraid that the next time I come home he will mention anal sex being my
dissertation subject, to show me he knows and to make me feel uncomfortable. But when I
thought about it a bit longer, I knew he would not mention it to me, because he likes to make
me feel awkward, but this subject makes him feel awkward. He would never seek a discussion
with me about a subject that makes him feel awkward. So I am probably safe.
The way I felt when telling my mother about the subject and the fact that I did not
even dare to tell my father, makes anal sex a tabooed subject between my parents and me.
With that I am most probably not the only person who is unable to speak about anal sex
without shame or feelings of being uncomfortable. But what is anal sex? And what is taboo
and its influence as a social institution? Can anal sex be interpreted as a taboo? If so how,
why and to what degree, furthermore what does that tell us about our social life? These
questions I would like to answer in this paper.

Anal sex
For this paper I will confine myself to analysing heterosexual anal sex, for two reasons. First
of all anal sex is a charged issue in my personal circle. The difficulty in telling my parents
might be explained by a generation gap; however anal sex is also a charged subject between
my friends and me. Sex and sexual intercourse are regularly topics of conversation in my
circle of friends. However, the subject of anal sex is almost never discussed and if it comes
up, it only surfaces in the conversation and then disappears as quickly as if it was never there.
I do not know my friends’ experiences with anal sex but we do often discuss other sexual
practices, such as vaginal intercourse, and oral or manual sexual acts. Secondly, upon
researching anal sex it became apparent to me that there is limited scientific literature on
heterosexual anal sex. The available scientific literature on heterosexual anal sex supports this
impression and the need for more research (Heywood & Smith, 2012, p. 523; McBride &
Fortenberry, 2010). Therefore it occurred to me that this might be an actual taboo in our
society.

  3
Anal sex; a history overview
Heterosexual anal sex is not cultural specific or new, it has been practiced for
hundreds if not thousands of years. Some Peruvian Moche pots have been found depicting
heterosexual anal intercourse dating back to 300AD. Also, Chinese and Japanese woodblock
prints and painted hand scrolls have been found depicting various sexual acts, including anal
sex, which have been produced between the 16th and 19th century. Written documents
regarding laws against sodomy, which is defined by McBride & Fortenberry (2010) as ‘anal
penetration or oral copulation with a member of the opposite or same sex’ (p. 124), can be
traced back as far as 500 AD. Although written documents do not go back further, historians
have traced sodomy laws as far as 149 BC (McBride & Fortenberry, 2010, p. 124). And if
bans against sodomy existed, it must also have been prevalent. These laws making sodomy
punishable even existed in some states in America up until 2003 (McBride & Fortenberry,
2010, p. 124). Even though anal intercourse is everything but new, it could be due to these
legal sanctions on sodomy that anal intercourse was not discussed in scientific literature until
the emergence of HIV and AIDS during the 1980s. Most research regards homosexual anal
intercourse and HIV and AIDS and little attention is given to heterosexual anal sex (McBride
& Fortenberry, 2010).

Anal sexuality and its association with homosexuality
Homosexual anal intercourse is addressed while heterosexual anal intercourse remains
in the dark. This is also what I notice when I talk to my friends. We can openly and
comfortably discuss anal intercourse practiced by homosexual friends but we never discuss
anal sex practices of heterosexual friends nor personal experiences with anal sex.
A few months ago a male friend of mine all of a sudden told me and a few other
friends, he had a boyfriend. Even though up until that point he had always been attracted to
girls. I will not say that I never expected this, but at that point it was certainly unexpected
news. In the conversation following this statement I did not hesitate to ask him if he had had
anal sex with his new boyfriend, who did have a homosexual past. I did not feel
uncomfortable asking, nor did he feel uncomfortable telling us about his experiences.
However, merely a week ago I was having dinner with eight of my close friends, male and
female. The conversation came to anal sex, because of my research. No personal anecdotes
regarding this subject were told by any of my friends. A few days later however, I had a
private conversation with one of my girlfriends who had attended that dinner. Completely
random she started telling me her personal experiences on anal sex. When she had finished

  4
she explained she wanted to tell me because of my research, but she had not felt confident to
tell it in front of the group at our dinner party. She confided in me that if someone else had
spoken first, she would have admitted to having had anal sex.
It seems to me that homosexuals feel more confident talking about anal sex compared
to heterosexuals; this is in line with the available literature, in which it is also more common
to associate anal sex with homosexuality. However, more heterosexual couples engage in anal
intercourse compared to homosexual couples. One study conducted in 1991 in the US
exposed that at least twice as many heterosexuals engage in anal intercourse compared to
homosexuals or bisexuals (Heywood & Smith, 2012, p.517). Another study conducted in
1999 concluded that in the absolute number of heterosexuals practicing anal intercourse could
be four times higher compared to homosexuals and even seven times higher if looked at anal
intercourse without protection in the form of condom use (Halperin, 1999). The most recent
data on the prevalence of anal sex among heterosexuals lies around one out of three people
that have ever engaged in heterosexual anal intercourse (McBride & Fortenberry, 2010, p.
125). So statistically speaking, at my dinner party more than two of our group are likely to
have ever engaged in anal sex but chose not to speak of it.

Defining anal sex
If nobody speaks of it, nobody really knows what it entails. Of course there is some
common knowledge on what anal sex is, but a scientific definition is not easily found. In
studying the scientific literature on the topic I realised that many articles do not elaborate on
the actual practice nor do they provide a definition of anal sex (Baldwin & Baldwin, 2000;
Carter, Henry-Moss, Hock-Long, Bergdall, & Andes, 2010; Heywood & Smith, 2012;
Leichliter, 2008). Among the scarce publications that do, McBride & Fortenberry (2010)
convey that the terms anal intercourse and anal sex are typically used to refer to the insertion
and trusting of one partners penis in the anus of the other. They themselves however, only
refer to anal intercourse as penetration of the anus by the penis. Anal sex entails anal
intercourse as well as ‘other anal sexual behaviours, such as oral-anal (analingus) contact and
penetration by fingers or other objects’ (McBride & Fortenberry, 2010, p. 123).
This definition seems pretty straightforward; however upon finding a book composed
of Internet articles, I found all sorts of combinations and specific actions that fall in the
category anal sex. Of course this should not be surprising; after all there are many ways to
have vaginal intercourse - but still I found it remarkable. I would have never thought of most
of these things on my own. I will name a few of the combinations I came across. One that I

  5
find especially interesting in the light of this paper is ‘pegging’ or ‘bend over boyfriend’
(BOB). This involves the women strapping on a dildo harness, on the place a man’s penis
would be situated. With this dildo she penetrates her partner anally. In this way the sex roles
are switched; as now the man is penetrated instead of the woman. Another possible practice is
giving the man a prostate massage, manually or through the use of an object. The man’s
prostate is situated anterior of the rectum wall and it is possible to induce an orgasm through
its stimulation alone.
I will name a few more practices that I never would have thought of and it is best to
regard them with some humour instead of taking these practices too seriously or visualising
them: fisting (the insertion of a fist in the anus), klismaphilia (having liquid inserted into the
rectum), barebacking (anal intercourse without condom), ass to mouth (inserting the penis
into the mouth right after it came out of the anus) and rusty trombone (simultaneously licking
the anus and manually stimulating the penis) (Advanced Techniques, 2010). The one that
shocked me most of all and I was really repulsed by is ‘felching’, which means sucking sperm
out of the partners’ anus or vagina (Klein, 2012, p. 377). There are without doubt many more
practices that I have not named. Also there are various toys used to enhance anal pleasure,
such as dildos, anal vibrators and anal beads, which is a string of beads that can be inserted in
and pulled out of the anus (Advanced Techniques, 2010) .
During my research on the Internet I was studying at Science Park, a building of the
University of Amsterdam. Places to sit where no one can look at your computer screen are
scarce. In researching these subjects I was constantly afraid that the people who were walking
past would read the words on my screen. Also on some sites I visited an explanatory picture
would appear next to the text. I was most afraid that such a picture would turn up when
someone was looking at my screen. A week previously I met some of the friends of my
boyfriend, the two of them stood next to my table and all of a sudden one of them spotted an
article lying on my table. He grabbed it and looked at it in astonishment, I felt my head redden
because I knew which article he was holding in his hand: ‘The ultimate guide to anal sex for
women’. I explained very fast with a bit of a stutter that this was the subject of my bachelor
dissertation, but that did not stop me from going red all the same. Imagine random people, to
whom I cannot explain this reason, walking past and seeing pictures, articles and words on
my computer screen concerning anal sex, felching or pegging. Therefore I decided merely
two hours after arriving at Science Park to go back home and finish that day’s research in
privacy.

  6
Heterosexual anal sex
Apparently anal sex is not a subject that can be taken too lightly. I must say that I was
surprised to find out that more heterosexual couples practice anal intercourse compared to
homosexual couples. Although I do not like to admit it, I personally find it more ‘natural’ for
homosexuals to practice anal intercourse compared to heterosexuals, or maybe more unnatural
for heterosexuals to practice anal intercourse compared to homosexuals. I might be too
conventional, but for me intercourse in its essence is penile-vaginal penetration. Homosexuals
are attracted to men, which makes penile-vaginal penetration obviously impossible. But I
believe that ideally and subconsciously if two people fall in love they want to be together in
the most intimate bodily composition possible and have offspring together. That is what
having sex is essentially about. However, men fall in love with men and women fall in love
with women and homosexual couples cannot have offspring that carries genetic material of
both partners. But for me it is obvious that homosexual men also want to have the closest
possible contact that might be subconsciously associated with making offspring. The closest
thing to penile-vaginal penetration is anal intercourse, so this is why it is logical to me why
homosexuals practice anal intercourse. It is as much an act of love as vaginal intercourse is
for heterosexual couples. However, if you can practice penile-vaginal intercourse that would
in my opinion be the act of love for heterosexuals. I notice that I find it difficult to explain
my, up until now, dormant and unvoiced feelings about anal sexuality in relation to
heterosexuals and homosexuals.
I tried to gather my thoughts on the reason why I feel this way, or why I believe this to
be so obviously true. I tried to look at it rationally and through the eyes of nature, or science. I
considered why I find anal sexuality for heterosexuals more ‘unnatural’ compared to
homosexuals, why I find it is natural to pick coitus over anal intercourse. I tried to find the
explanation of this personal ‘obvious truth’ in the evolutionary theory. I contemplated that if
this problem is considered evolutionary, anal sex is pointless, because it produces no
offspring. From an evolutionary point of view the biggest quest in human life is to pass on
one’s own genetic material, and make sure that this genetic material lives on for forever more.
However, my tutor pointed out to me that this could also be viewed as a religious explanation,
which is very much true. The church banned everything apart from coitus that can only be
engaged in after marriage. Furthermore he pointed out that condom use is also not
evolutionary beneficial for it prevents the possibility of offspring, but condom use does not, at
least for me, evoke a feeling of being unnatural. I tried to use nature and science to fit my own
assumptions, to plea that my feelings of unnaturalness towards heterosexual anal sex are

  7
logical because nature has intended it this way. I came to realise that these reasons are all
fallacies. It is interesting and slightly unnerving however that I felt the need to justify my
thoughts through nature and science, as so many before me have done to marginalise people,
beliefs and customs. Apparently it is so obvious to me to choose coitus over anal intercourse
that there should be a natural explanation for it.
However I do not try to make a comparison or hierarchy between vaginal-penile
intercourse and oral or manual sexual acts. When it comes to these two sexual acts I believe
them to be natural and part of sexual experience, but they are also not fit to provide
reproduction and are therefore comparable to anal sexual acts. The purpose of engaging in
sexual acts is not merely to reproduce but also because it is enjoyable, pleasuring and
gratifying. Anal intercourse is but one of all possible sexual interactions that can gratify the
human sexual need. Therefore anal sex should not be treated differently from oral sex,
masturbation or other sexual practices that are not (any longer) seen as unnatural. However, I,
and with me many others in my surroundings have difficulty viewing it this way. Anal sex is
not talked about as openly as other sexual practices; it is for the most part motioned with
hesitation and awkwardness.
Only in 2003 the last states of America abolished their anti-sodomy laws. Only twenty
years worth of scientific literature mentions and investigates heterosexual anal. There is a fair
amount of review articles concerning heterosexual anal sex, but most of them concentrate on
risk factors associated with anal intercourse (Baldwin & Baldwin, 2000; Carter et al., 2010;
Heywood & Smith, 2012; Leichliter, 2008; McBride & Fortenberry, 2010; Melby, 2007).
Most of the articles on heterosexual anal intercourse stress the fact that too little is known
about the anal sexual practices of heterosexuals (Baldwin & Baldwin, 2000; Carter et al.,
2010; Heywood & Smith, 2012; Leichliter, 2008; McBride & Fortenberry, 2010). Also
popular ‘how-to’ books are scarce compared to books on other sexual practices. Only a hand
full of books is written, and for a change not about the risks or dangers, but on how to enjoy it
best: practical guides to anal pleasure. These include: ‘The ultimate guide to anal sex for
women’ (1998) and ‘The anal sex position guide’ (2009), both by Tirstan Taoromino, ‘Anal
pleasure and health’ by Jack Morin (2010) and ‘The adventurous couple's guide to strap-on
sex’ by Violet Blue (2007). However, over the past decade there seems to be a proliferation of
materials and references to heterosexual anal sex, in popular publications as well as in
scientific documentation (McBride & Fortenberry, 2010, p. 124), but anal sex between
heterosexuals is still in the margins of society (Morin, 2010, pp. xi-xvii). There still exists a

  8
reluctance to talk about anal sexuality that is difficult to explain through rational reasoning.
Therefore we will dive in the theory on taboo.

Theories on Taboo
The word taboo entered the English language through Captain Cook’s usage of the word in
his description of his third voyage trough the Polynesian archipelago, which took place during
the last quarter of the eighteenth century and the first part of the nineteenth century. Captain
Cook notices that the Polynesian word tapu (which was corrupted into the English language
as taboo) is used in all cases where things are not to be touched. In Cook’s travel descriptions
it becomes clear that the word taboo is not used as often as the customs it depicts are seen and
perceived. Cook explains that taboo affects outward manner with a mysterious significance.
The English language does not have a single word for it, as it refers to people,
practices and places that are both prohibited and sacred (Steiner, n.d., 118).
Therefore the meaning of the word taboo must be found by taking the context in which it is
used into account. During that time, and even many years later, taboo was seen as something
for the primitive. Taboo came to be associated with silly rules without any relevance. The
accompanying term mana, which refers to the power ascribed to people that could impose
taboo, was assigned a comparable exotic aura.
During the Victorian period that followed upon Cook’s travels the concept taboo
received interest from different scholars due to two reasons. Firstly, during that time there was
a new way of rationalising everything, including religion. Religion was made to fit the aims
of the new industrial society. In trying to redeem everything in religion to a rational
explanation there remained certain acts and human attitudes not consistent with the minimum
of ethical coherence modern religion was supposed to display. These attitudes and practices
were subsequently ‘explained’ by designating them the status of survivals from earlier
illogical primitive ways of thinking. They were dealt with in terms of magic and taboo and
became the two main categories of religious residua (Steiner,1999, p. 133).
The second reason is that the Victorian time itself is one of the most taboo-minded
societies on record. It was an expanding society and different groups and classes could rise to
comparative wealth and therein needing to defend their right to wealth. This resulted in a very
sensitive awareness of avoidance customs as positive social factors and a strictly
departmentalised vocabulary (Steiner, 1999, p. 133). From this moment on various scholars
including many anthropologists wrote about taboo. For a long time it was believed that taboo
arises from an inferior mentality and was only for the primitive societies (Douglas, 1979, pp.

  9