Tequila Mockingbird: Cocktails with a Literary Twist

161 Pages·2013·6.292 MB·English

by  Tim Federle, Lauren Mortimer

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T
Wine & Spirits
e
An English major walks into a bar. . .
q
u
Congrats. You fought through War and Peace, burned through
i
Fahrenheit 451, and sailed through Moby-Dick. All right, you l
nearly drowned in Moby-Dick, but you made it to shore—and a
you deserve a drink!
M
A fun gift for barflies and a terrific treat for book clubs, Tequila
Mockingbirdis the ultimate cocktail book for the literary obsessed.
o
Featuring 65 delicious drink recipes—paired with wry commentary
on history’s most beloved novels—the book also includes bar bites, c
drinking games, and whimsical illustrations throughout. k
i
n
EVEN IF YOU DON’T HAVE A B.A. IN ENGLISH,
g
TONIGHT YOU’RE GONNA DRINK LIKE YOU DO.
b
Drinks include:
i
(cid:129) The Pitcher of Dorian Grey Goose r
TIMFEDERLEis a Broadway
(cid:129)The Last of the Mojitos actor, word nerd,cocktail enthu- d
siast, author of the YA comic
(cid:129) Love in the Time of Kahlúa
novel, Better Nate Than Ever,
(cid:129) Romeo and Julep and former lifestyle columnist
(cid:129)A Rum of One’s Own for Apartment Therapy. He lives F
E
(cid:129) AreYouThere,God? (and drinks) in New York City. D
Say hi at TimFederle.com and E
It’sMe,Margarita. on Twitter at @TimFederle. R
L
(cid:129) Vermouth the Bell Tolls E
and more! ISBN 978-0-7624-4865-4
#TequilaMockingbird
Visit us on the web! www.runningpresscooks.com
$15.00in U.S.A. $17.50in Canada £9.99 in U.K. PRINTED IN THE UNTITED STATES 04/13 RUNNING
PRESS
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COCKTAILS with a LITERARY TWIST
TIM FEDERLE
ILLUSTRATED BY
LAUREN MORTIMER
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Disclaimer: Please drink responsibly. This book is intended for people 21 years
and over who know the difference between Beverly Cleary and Judy Blume.
© 2013 by Tim Federle
Illustrations © 2013 by Lauren Mortimer
Published by Running Press,
A Member of the Perseus Books Group
All rights reserved under the Pan-American and
International Copyright Conventions
Printed in China
This book may not be reproduced in whole or in part, in any form or by any means,
electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage
and retrieval system now known or hereafter invented, without written permission from
the publisher.
Books published by Running Press are available at special discounts for
bulk purchases in the United States by corporations, institutions, and other
organizations. For more information, please contact the Special Markets
Department at the Perseus Books Group, 2300 Chestnut Street, Suite 200,
Philadelphia, PA 19103, or call [phone], ext. 5000, or e-mail
[email protected].
ISBN 978-0-7624-4865-4
Library of Congress Control Number: 2012944541
E-book ISBN 978-0-7624-4876-0
9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
Digit on the right indicates the number of this printing
Design by Joshua McDonnell
Edited by Jordana Tusman
Typography: Accanthis, Bembo, and Copperplate
Running Press Book Publishers
2300 Chestnut Street
Philadelphia, PA 19103-4371
Visit us on the web!
www.runningpresscooks.com
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For Brenda Bowen—worth her
weight in Cuervo Gold
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CONTENTS
Introduction . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1
Tools . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 4
Glassware . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 4
Equipment . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 6
Techniques . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 7
Making a Drink . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 7
Decorating a Drink . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 8
Terms . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 9
Spirits . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 9
Liqueurs . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 10
Beer . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 10
Wine . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 10
Other Flavorings . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 11
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Part 1
Drinks for Dames . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13
One Flew Over the Cosmo’s Nest . . . . . . . . . 15
Ethan Pom . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 16
Rye and Prejudice . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 18
Love in the Time of Kahlúa . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19
Brave New Swirled . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 21
A Cocktail of Two Cities . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 22
The Cooler Purple . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 24
Frangelico and Zooey . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 25
Bloody Carrie . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 26
Howards Blend . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 28
Gin Eyre . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 29
Paradise Sauced . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 31
The Joy of Sex on the Beach . . . . . . . . . . . . 32
A Midsummer Night’s Beam . . . . . . . . . . . . 34
The Postman Always Brings Ice . . . . . . . . . . 36
Remembrance of Things Pabst . . . . . . . . . . . 37
Bridget Jones’s Daiquiri . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 39
Romeo and Julep . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 40
The S(ide)carlet Letter . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 42
A Rum of One’s Own . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 44
Tequila Mockingbird . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 45
The Yellow Wallbanger . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 47
The Unbearable Lightness of Peeing . . . . . . . 48
Are You There God? It’s Me, Margarita. . . . . . 49
The Turn of the Screwdriver . . . . . . . . . . . . 51
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Part 2
Gulps for Guys . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 53
Crime and Punish-mint . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 55
Decline and Fall Down . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 56
Drankenstein . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 58
Huckleberry Sin . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 60
Absinthe Shrugged . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 61
The Count of Monte Cristal . . . . . . . . . . . . 63
Moby-Drink . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 64
Gulp-iver’s Travels . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 66
A Confederacy of Ounces . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 68
The Last of the Mojitos . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 69
The Lime of the Ancient Mariner . . . . . . . . . 71
Lord of the Mai-Tais . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 72
Infinite Zest . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 74
Heart of Dark Mist . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 76
The Moonshine and Sixpence . . . . . . . . . . . 77
A Farewell to Amaretto . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 79
One Hundred Beers of Solitude . . . . . . . . . . 80
Orange Julius Caesar . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 82
Vermouth the Bell Tolls . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 84
Silas Marnier . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 85
The Old Man and the Seagram’s . . . . . . . . . 87
The Malted Falcon . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 88
Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea Breeze. 90
Lord Pimm . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 92
The Sound and the Slurry . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 93