Secrets from a Stargazer's Notebook: Making Astrology Work for You

399 Pages·2001·8.499 MB·English

by  Debbi Kempton Smith

SECRETS
FROM A
STARGAZER'S
NOTEBOOK:
Making Astrology
Work For You
Debbi Kempton-Smith
THE DEFINITIVE
LAZY PERSON'S GUIDE
TO ASTROLOGY
SECRETS'FROM A STARGAZER'S NOTEBOOK is a different kind
of astrology bopk. It's a fun, easy-to-undersfand
guide to the stars - how they affect you and hpw you can
.. dfolpver their meaning in virtually no time at all.
^How arid when to deal with family friends and enemies.
^Mpking love and marriage more satisfying. '
fcThkbest day of the month to ask for a raise.
. ^Astrology, birth control and planning the sex of your baby.
) ^Looking out for Zodiac Twilight Zones.
' v? When to buy, wtfen to sell, afid when to get away from it all.
All tfys and ffiiiChTnorefrom expert stargazer
Debbi K^Tipton-SrTfitb.jqstrologerto psychiatrists and „
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politfeons/ ropk'n' rollers and stockbrokers.
An almanac olplanejpf^plans and star-studded angles and
inftuencBs-Mrom Venus^. sleazy sex
and el|rndl love to, machp man Marsand his ;!
f
* fiery, ts Oft/enzy. - V
„ i
LfARN THE SEC ETS OF THE STARS
\U THIS DOOR- O-DOOR SEARCH
THROUGH THE TWELVE HOUSES,
OF THE HOROSCOPE - GOOD FROM 1901
"mROUGH THE YEAR 2000.
How—and why—
does astrology work
9
m
People get crazy and sexy and even bleed more
on the full moon. Sunspot flare-ups shoot the
stock market all over the place. Even buildings
respond to the movements of planets. Why?
Enough evidence is now in to show that astrology
does work. We know what happens, if not why.
While we're waiting for scientists to discover what
makes the planets influence human behavior,
astrologers are working to improve the human
condition as affected by those rocks in space.
SECRETS FROM A
STARGAZER'S NOTEBOOK
will streamline your life and will tell you when to
go after what you want.
ALAN OKEN'S COMPLETE ASTROLOGY by Alan Oken
ASTROLOGY FOR THE MILLIONS by Grant Lewi
HEAVEN KNOWS WHAT by Grant Lewi
LINDA GOODMAN'S SUN SIGNS by Linda Goodman
Before it move, hold it,
Before it go wrong, mould it,
Drain off water in winter before it freeze,
Before weeds grow, sow them to the breeze.
You can deal with what has not happened, can foresee
Harmful events and not allow them to be.
Though—as naturally as a seed becomes a tree of
arm-wide girth—
There can rise a nine-tiered tower from a man's handful
of earth
Or here at your feet a thousand-mile journey have birth,
Quick action bruises,
Quick grasping loses.
Therefore a sane man's care is not to exert
One move that can miss, one move that can hurt.
Most people who miss, after almost winning,
Should have 'known the end from the beginning.'.
—Lao Tzu
Contents
Introduction
I. HOW TO LOOK AT A CHART
How to Look at a Chart 3
The Horoscope Houses: Dark Enchantments at the
Gazebos's Twelve-unit Motel 16
Welcome to the Zodiac Zone 23
The Rising Sign: Your World View and the World's
View of You, Too 41
Those Shocking Squiggles in Your Chart: How to
Read Them 53
Rulers: They Make the Horoscope Hang Together 60
Aspects: What's the Angle? 64
Retrogrades 70
Fire Signs, Air Signs. Jello and Dirt Signs—Elements
and Qualities 74
How to Read a Chart in Less Than Five Minutes 77
U. THE PLANETS AND OTHER CELESTIAL BODIES
The Moon—The Things You Can't Live Without HI
Get the Moon to Work for You Everv Dav I(K)
Entering the Twilight Zone: Avoiding Trouble on the
Void-of-Course Moon 103
Bom on a Void-of-Course Moon 107
Eclipses 100
The Sun—Where are You Going in Life? 110
How Do You Speak? Mercury and the Yak-Yak Tables 132
Don't Sign, Don't Buy—Mercury Retrograde 150
Venus—Sleazy Sex and Eternal Love 154
Mars—How You Drive People Crazy 183
Jupiter—Merciful Fatso 200
Saturn—What's Stopping You From Getting There? 210
Chiron 243
The Outer Planets 246
Uranus—Rude Awakener 247
Neptune—Ecstasy Express 255
Pluto—Below the Boom Boom Room 260
III. ASTROLOGY IN DAILY LIVING From A to X
Astrological Birth Control 269
The Chart of a . . . Building??? 270
Critters 274
Enemies 278
Food 280
Gifts 286
Astrology and Health 292
Horary: Burning Questions 294
Horoscopes of Nations 301
How Do You Make the World a Better Place? 319
Maniacs 323
Marriage 325
Megabucks, Tycoonery, and Moolah 331
Old Age 342
Past Lives 346
Rock-V-Roll Horoscopes 354
The Astrology of Sports 370
Synastry: The Sinister Art of Getting Along With
Human Beings 371
Travel 372
X Ray Relationship Charts 377
IV. HOW TO USE THE TABLES IN THIS BOOK
What Time Zone Do You Live In? 381
How to Win at Nearly Everything, Achieve Nirvana,
and Screw Your Enemies with Black Magic Astrology 384
Red Lights, Green Lights 387
How to Use the Red Lights, Green Lights Table 390
Acknowledgements
The tables and computer charts in this book arc provided by:
ASTRO COMPUTING SERVICES. Box 16297, San Diego.
California 92116
Tel. [phone]
Horoscope data supplied courtesy of:
ASTRO CARTOGRAPHY. Box 959-KS. El Ccrrito.
California 94530
C.A.O. TIMES MAGAZINE, Box 75. Old Chelsea Station.
NYC 10113
AI H. Morrison
Lois Rodden, Profiles of Women, published by
American Federation of Astrologers
Bill Sarubbi
Zane Stein, The Association for Studying Chiron.
c/o C.A.O. Times
Clients wishing to be famous
Clients wishing to remain anonymous
New asteroids data from C.A.O. Times magazine
Thanks:
Roy Alexander
Eleanor Bach
Michal Bigger
Maureen Burk
Ram Dass
Liz Greene
Karen Haas, a brilliant editor and a scholar!
Rob Hand
Betsy Hooper
Charles Jaync
Vivia Jaync
Peter LeGuillou
Dr. Lee Lehman
Brian Lorentz
Dr. Brian Marsden, Smithsonian Astrophysical Observatory
H. Craig Merrell, beyond the call of all
Neil F. Michelsen
A1 H. Morrison
Bob Pike
Lois Rodden
Kim Rosston
Bill Sarubbi
Lynn Schaffer
Jane Schreiber
Norman Schreiber
Dr. Dennis Schwartz
Rod Serling
Susan Sewell
Zane Stein
Matthew Taylor
Jill Wood
Tom Wood
Sydny Weinberg
The James Davis Band, The Paddock Lounge, Bourbon Street,
New Orleans
The book was written in the howling night hours in London,
New York, San Diego, Los Angeles, New Orleans, Fort Lauderdale,
Munich, and in the wild woods of Main Line Philadelphia.
Musical aids were provided by Dr. John the Nighttripper,
Jimi Hendrix, The Rolling Stones, The Kinks, and Tubular Bells.
The example horoscopes appearing in Secrets from a Stargazer's
Notebook were triple-checked for accuracy; unfortunately 100%
accuracy regarding birth data is difficult to obtain. Some
inaccuracies may have occurred.
Introduction
Kings and queens of the Age of Aquarius, come on now, I know
what you want. You want everything.
Let me guess. You want a retreat in the country with chickens
and goats and a year's supply of food just in case they drop The
Big One, right?
And you need a place in town, just a modest brownstone—I
understand!—and a baby Lear jet with its own landing strip and
lots of pots of money to spend on your friends, of course! But
you want deeper things too. A job that fulfills you. A romantic
Significant Other. A code to live by. Awesome spiritual insight.
World peace, inner peace, love, truth, beauty, wisdom, and
nirvana every now and again. Freedom from anxiety, depression,
bills, pills, taxes, loneliness, fear, death, and boredom A holi-
day in Fiji. A night at the Ritz. Little lunches at the Russian Tea
Room with Bianca and Andy.
What's that? Your needs are more modest than that? You want
your tomatoes to come up right and the mushroom crop in the
cellar to flourish and multiply? You want your kids to stop
rotting their precious jelly-brains on television and to grow up
kind and amusing, healthy and happy? You want your old job
back; you want a new job; you want a raise; you want Robert
Redford to tie you up with silken cords? You want the Pope to
wink as he goes by? Do you dream of discovering an oil substi-
tute out of dirt, ending both the energy problem and world
starvation at a single blow? You want your friends to like you
and your enemies to screw themselves so royally that you sin-
cerely pity the poor bastards? You wish, perhaps, to save the
whale?
Try voodoo.
xin